ALL NEW Road to Recovery for the Recently Ditched

[BEAUTlFUL]

Dearly Be-Chucked, we are gathered here today because, for whatever reason, our man has dumped us!

Come in here and chat about erection-texts, lechy lecturers and getting the painters in.

You are not alone

Waves at ifyourhappy, glad I haven't been deserted! How are things going for you.

Hello everyone, sorry for the absence - work, kids, freezing to bloody death and a certain amount of virtual perviness. Anyway, I have not deserted the good ship Dumpling.

I was seriously tempted to post that I was a master baker in the middle of the bread conversation but decided that it was too immature even for me.

Maybees, like Mumfun says, you'll get great advice from Startingover, I hope things get easier for you.

Hello Mavis, Mumfun and Ifyou'rehappy.

Loobie, thinking of you - hope things are ok.

Starting - I'd go for puppy like a shot but then my mind is addled by lack of penis input so my judgement may well be skewed.

Hi all

Nothing much to say here really.

Waiting for invite to Beauty surrey mansion.

Going to good concert this weekend.

Doing major tidy and clear out of house

Going to try and find pilates class that I can go to while DD at nursery.

Eating too much of the kids chocolate

Buying too much lovely underwear

Getting myself in gear for DD birthday!

Hmmm Caramela I think we should hear a bit more about this virtual perviness -have you graduated to skype sex?

Starting - sorry youre snowed in. Any decisions on puppies? Has MD been kindly put out to pastures new?

IfyourHappy how are you?

Hi all

No penis input here either I'm afraid - still a dumpling

A rather challenging time at the moment and so no time to even pursue candidates right now

Would love to regale you all (that is a word isn't it?) with witty tales of my exploits but I would have to make them up! Weekend highlights - playing with kitten/cake much enjoyed by the DCs/walks in the snow (failed on the bread). Lowlight - various (ahem) discussions with BE who is behaving like a total twunt

Oh Evening Dumplings, delighted to see you all coming back to the fold! Well, I cannot resist, Caramela the minute I read, virtual perviness my imagination went to overdrive (webcaming bf??), spill all to us deprived & depraved dumplings!! Delighted to see you back, & glad to hear your master bakery skills [grin}.

Mumfun, you are putting me to shame, you are doing all the things I should be doing. I did up dc's bedrooms before xmas as you might remember in my operation house (during which I got side tracked with MD)! Anyway, bedrooms now look fab but wardropes are a disgrace, I seriously need to get my arse in gear but am lacking motivation. House is full of clutter, not only do I have all the santa toys but my two dd's also have b'days in Jan so house full of toys.

Ifyourhappy, sorry to hear you're still having problems with BE, mind yourself.

Well MD has been put out to pasture, puppy is lined up & ready to go as soon as I am no longer snowbound . My reasons for this are as follows : MD is too emotional (like really a tattoo of mammy! What was I thinking?? , I don't want undying love at the moment just a bit of CL action for the cold nights, puppy is the best shag you could imagine, all about pleasing the woman! She comes first etc... he's not 35 but he has the stanima of a stallion! (ex football player), completely trustworthy & is in a similiar place in life to me so is happy to take this for what it is.

I've considered doing without either & waiting for Mr Right but really life is short & I've been on my own & trying to work on a dead marriage for long enough now. I'm going to enjoy the company of puppy for however long it lasts.

Not webcamming, no - Kerrist - I suspect fiddling with myself on camera would entice no-one. A certain amount of escalating x-rated elctronic material may have been exchanged < cough >.

I'm worried that I'm getting obsessed. What is the matter with me ? - throw in a reluctance to get washed and an inability to communicate in anything other than grunts and I could be mistaken for a 15 year old boy, albeit one with big tits.

Puppy sounds fabulous - I'm surprised you've not dug yourself out of the snow and hired an emergency sex skidoo to get to him. I would, but then I've already outed myself above as a sex-crazed nutcase .

Ah Caramela, glad to hear you're having fun in true dumpling style . Also want to encourage full disclosures as I don't want to be the only slapper outing herself here .

Puppy can wait, he's eager & keen! I know it all sounds erotic etc but the reality is I'm really tied down with dc's. I don't like leaving them with babysitter that often so it means going out when their in bed, tearing down the road, frantic sex, tearing back road again.... am on tight schedule as I have to have babysitter dropped home & can't be too late. Oh the joys of single parenting & trying to juggle a sex life!!

helloooo Dumplings

Just dipped a toe back into Dumpling Island because I have been so busy arranging stuff for funeral Friday that I have not had time to internet play. I have to say that you girlies never cease to make me giggle.

I too though of webcams and self wanking for Caramela gave me a right giggle. Startingover well done on making a decision re MD I may have missed a post but noted that eager puppy is on standby you go girl.

I too have ben stuck in the snow twice in my car, yesterday two young men helped me escape and I found myself wondering about their sexual stamina ( they were about 25)which is just wrong really but I just can't help myself. I resisited the urge to throw myself at their feet and say take me I'm yours and merely thanked them profusely like the proper grown up I am supposed to be.

I now officially own the house in my own right well along with a huge mortgage but it feels pretty damn good to be honest. And my decree absolute is at the court awaiting a rubber stamp so things are looking up.

Its ex Twunts birthday today and although I made DS send a card and pressie I have firmly resisted any urge to say Happy Birthday by text so I am so proud of how strong I have become

I just have to get through funeral Friday now which will be dreadful and then 2010 really starts for me.

Waves to all Dumplings that have returned to the fold

Hi Loobie, great to hear from you again. Glad you're keeping well despite this sad time for you & family. My thoughts will be with you for Fri.

Well done on not texting happy birthday & on having your house transfer finalised.

I'm still knee deep in trying to get db's estate sorted, will be ongoing for awhile.

Snow is gone & schools are going to reopen tomorrow.

OMG, MD has resurfaced & is of the mistaken belief that we're back on track. He's dying of the flu at the moment & I couldn't break it to him on the phone, so I'll have to meet up & break the bad news.

Hello lovely dumplings.

Loobie, I'm glad you feel better for sorting the mortgage out and having the divorce almost finalised, it must have been dreadful waiting for so long until you could have your mum's funeral. It's such a draining, awful period between a death and a funeral, as Starting says we'll be thinking of you on Friday.

Starting - slapper ? how very dare you . I hope MD takes it just badly enough to make you feel wanted and not so badly that you end up feeling unhappy.

I would of course post salacious details of BF-Caramela communications for dumpling amusement/entertainment but I am worried about him recognising himself a laydee, don't ya know.

Ifyou'rehappy - sorry about BE being a big twat, can't you feed up and train the kitten so it attacks him on sight ? Imagine how awful it would be if kitty were to sink razor sharp claws into his bollocks

Caramela post the filth how dare you hide it from us dumplings

Startingover good luck with MD rotten task to have to deal with but think of mammy lol ...... no seriously good luck it's not a nice task no matter how brief things have been ((hug))

Caramela, did I tell you I'm actually still a virgin ! Well almost, just did it once for each dc .

Hi Loobie, great to see your spirits still up. Phonecall with MD earlier convinced me anyway that he's not a keeper, terrible patient, just stops communicating when sick . Also seems to have difficulty with listening skills or comprehension, kept saying you're all right, it was just a misunderstanding, we'll start again!! Oh dear god, he's going to be v hard to let down gently. Will do it amicably anyway as I'll still be bumping into him from time to time & I don't want any awkwardness.

Waves to all other dumplings.

Ok my plan to retain my dignity and self control faltered at the weekend when i had a fumble with my H, v quick v horny .First time i fancied him in 2mths ,purely hormonal ,me gagging for it sort of thing,and I dont actually feel that bad about it.But I know it wont be good for me in the long run so made a note to have a clear plan that in another six weeks we are either together or working at being together or officially separated (none of this "need my space" ambiguity).He did ignore me the next time I saw him but now that im tryin to be more detatched from his drinking im like, who cares make the most of it .He still keeps goin on about how his mess is all my doin but im tryin to stop engaging in those sorts of conversations cos if i react(ie flip it in utter disbelief) just lets him justify his drinking. Did the alanon meeting.Really odd how everyone has been living the same life as me.Anyway alanon reckon to aim for serenity,bit of a tall order most days at the moment, but will give it a go.I think if I can improve my own behaviour ,find some peace,learn how best to support him and he still doesnt want to change then at least I will feel that I tried my best to save my marriage.But I don't know if i'll always be able to keep my pants on !

Hi Maybees, I had just sat down with a cuppa & was flicking through some of the other threads in complete disbelief. Is the world gone mad!

That's great that you got some support at Alanon but remember it's yourself you need to be supporting & not H. It is about learning not to enable bad behaviour, it's up to your H to support himself or ultimately he will never get recovery. He needs to do this for himself, not for you, not for the dc's or else it will not last in the longrun.

I know it's a huge temptation to fall back into the sack but be careful about the messages this might be giving your H (that is that he can treat you badly i.e. him ignoring you next time he saw you). as this is probably not what you want to hear. I really & truly wouldn't in any way want to hurt your feelings but I've had 12yrs exp with addictions, alanon, aa etc & I just want to advise you to be careful.

Try & pick up as much liturature as possible at you next Alanon meeting. The more you learn about your H's disease the easier it will be for you whatever way things work out. Take care.

Just re-read my post & wanted to say, I do have the utmost compassion for your H. My post might have sounded harsh. I have just had a lot of experience in this & know that addictions of any kind if not treated destroy the lives of the nearest & dearest. You cannot help your H unfortunately, only he can do that, you will learn this in Alanon.

Off to do lunches but will check back in when I'm done.

Hi Dumplings

I too have been reading a number of other threads this evening - a bit distracting and ing.

Maybees, I will leave you in StartingOver's capable hands. She is a senior Dumpling, much revered in our world

Loobs, hope you're ok, thoughts will be with you on Friday

StartingOver, enjoying reading about your exploits and purity

Hi Ifyourhappy, I've been reading the paranoid thread & went into the link ! It would nearly put you off sex & men for life, we'll all be having warped dreams tonight!

Am honoured at the "much revered" but don't think I can handle the senior dumpling status . Would feel a need to be sensible & curtail my activities . Am looking forward to sharing my exploits with puppy as soon as I've had a chance to persue them & wouldn't like to be restricted . Apart from all that at 37, I would like to remain a junior for as long as I can .

Waves to all other dumplings & if anyone is feeling down or depressed check out the paranoid thread, it will distract you from all else & make you feel your problems are minor! If that fails I believe there is also a car sex thread running.....

Oh Christ, I've just seen the titles bum love & masturbating........has anyone just got normal problems anymore!!

its cool just couldnt have shared that with anyone cause worst thing i could have done at the moment and people would have judged me so badly but hey we all make mistakes.Its all wrong ,whatever happens I know that, ,but ive just got to keep on goin for me and my kids keep happy for them and know that in 6 mths my life will be calmer and even better in a year cos I wont be living with an alcoholic (but I cant promise I wont shag him a few times )x

Thanks again startin I do appreciate your posts just a bit mixed up i guess take care nite nite x

Don't call it a mistake Maybees & I wouldn't worry about anyone judging you. I could say it was a huge mistake when I took my exh back last year but I can honestly say it was the best thing I ever did because it took that for me to finally begin to accept my marriage was over.

Shag your h all you want once it doesn't leave you feeling shite. Also, who knows what the outcome of this will be, your h could indeed find recovery before it's too late for you. You're doing great . Chin up & tits out.

Bum love, is that like shagging an arsehole ,cos if so im a f*cking expert!

Maybees, you just gave me a great laugh, that was a classic . I'm also an expert so .