Beautiful's Road to Recovery for the Recently Ditched

[BEAUTlFUL]

Dearly Be-Chucked, we are gathered here today because, for whatever reason, our man has dumped us!

Whether we were dating, cohabiting or married, we are now to use therapist-speak well effed-off about the whole business and are desperate to regain our fabulosity.

Well, this is the place! This is where we regain our positivity, our self-confidence and eventually our mojos. We might think at the moment that we'd also like to regain our men, but that might not last long, as we'll soon realise that anyone who could put us through this does not deserve us.

Come in and start regaining your brilliance! I will be setting us exercises to complete that are based vaguely on self-help books, beauy tips and Feng Shui, or we'll just have a right good bitch until we feel completely drained and sick of the sound of our ex's names. Whatever works.

Buba, well done to you on raising you dd alone. The early days are brutal to avoid contacting, tg I'm past all that now, hang i there.

Anyway Fellow Dumplings, as the thread is so quiet I'm assuming you're all away visualising somewhere. Have news to report, the visualisations are begining to work already, a fine ride just strode up my drive & planted his bum on my sofa! I kid you not. However, the secret tells us we need to be very specific so I obviously need to fine tune a bit as he was only here to talk about what happened with x on Sun. It's a start anyway, god he was soo sexy!! He's coming back 2m morn so I'll have to be up early to beautify myself.

On the whole trifle addiction front, had to drive ds's playdate home to arsewhole of nowhere in flooding, storms & gales. Up a mountainside & through a forrest, was fearful near death experience, didn't even know I lived near to such a place. Anyway, when I rejoined civialisation again, I decided I deffinately needed trifle tonight to steady nerves, bloody garage only had microscopic portions, which is a total insult to a woman of my devouring capabilities & so I'm sat here with fresh cream swissroll instead (am regretting my hasty decision now though, cravings have sat in).

Hi all. Have updated myself on all your posts over last couple of days and had a good laugh at some of them.

Mavis thanks for your offer of long distance interior designer! Will take you up on that offer at some point!

Caramela are you finally seeing the light about your navel-gazing xp? Sounds as though he's still around a fair bit but what on earth is he saying to you? (ignore my nosy question if you want!).

Beauty why don't I believe you when you say you're off men!?! If only we could just do without them happily and not feel that yearning (mostly for sex of course).

Am toying with the idea of getting a fuck buddy but don't know how to go about it. Don't think I've really got the guts but it's a nice thought. Maybe this is what we all need then but how to find one. Thoughts please ladies.

Am very excited about house but this has been overshadowed by xh being total arse again. God I have to watch everything I do with ds. Am under intense scrutiny the whole time - it's awful. My own special persecutor - just for me - for years to come. Can't wait.

I've been doing really well on xp front over the last week but today have cried again and am missing him loads. Feeling like I hate him at the moment for the lost year and the false hope for the future. However, I can now see a way forward even though I still love him and couldn't contemplate being with anyone else.

Just want to get into my new house with ds and settle down, finish my course and get myself together emotionally. Had a flip out with ds tonight and was shouting really loudly. Feel so bad. I never was like this before xh. I get so angry and I know it's frustration, stress and feeling out of control. Does anyone else get like this? I think I'm alright generally but then something happens and I tend to fall apart.

Hope all is well with everyone tonight.

Hi Lamby, great to see you back. One bad day is nada out of a full week, you've come a long way, big pat on back. you're still having trouble from xh, he will eventually move on. See my post to beauty re shouting at ds.

You might recall I previously mentioned dipping my toe in the whole FB (eager puppy type) thing. The physical release was great (multiples all the way ) but despite his multi talants in that dept, I found him incredibly boring & unstimulating in every other dept & just didn't fancy him.

On reflection now though maybe I should go back because the only thing that was missing really was lust & I've just realised typing this that lust is what landed me in the shite with xh!!

Ok, this is too complicated, I'm just going to focus on my visualisations & leave the universe sort it out!!!!!!

Been here before but had to change name.

Beauty - continue to be amazed by your exploits, I am in awe of your dating exploits and only wish I had your courage.

Lamby, I'm with you on the fbuddy, I'm just not sure where we get them (or one anyway).

Googling the secret now, not heard of that one but sounds like something I need.

Hi Ifyouhappy, I'll be racking brains now to figure out who you are!!!!!!! Any hints??

Not really - treat me as someone new as I've not posted much previously, just occasionally.

Am really mostly an onlooker summoning up courage to add to everyone's wise words.

And on that note, there was a question raised earlier about trying to be a better mother. I can relate to that one! Although XP is still around it's amazing how much he's just completely out of the picture now he's left. I feel like I'm trying to be a good mother / a star at work / someone with a good social life all at the same time. Knackering and hard but I really do need to do all three. Sometimes it works but it just takes one thing to go wrong and then the dominoes fall over........

But as the name says, so much happier than pre-dump.

Morning Dumplings

Well the date was good, met for a drink I intended to grace him with an hour of my time and ended up chatting for 2 and a half hours only reason we left was because the pub shut.

He did not get at all smutty, a bit flirty which is nice but I dont think he's a womaniser.....

Early days i know but he gave me a lift home I had walked down there and he even opened the car door for me I know its old fashioned but I like all that.

Biggest bonus is I DID fancy him woo hoo. He has alrady sent me a text today trying to arrange another date so we'll see waht happens

Beautiful I found him on website date the uk its only 4.99 for a month , you don't have to pay but unless you do you cannot read any messages people send you or send messages yourself. i was a bit reluctant to join it but my friend insisted I did.

Book not arrived in post yet I am waiting with baited breath lol

Morning Dumplings,
Loobie, I am so excited for you, he sounds great. I don't think you need the book, you seem to have mastered the trick already!! Well done to you.

Ifyourhappy, I know what you mean, when all is running smoothly I feel akin to superwoman, life is great etc.. alas when things start to go wrong I can feel my whole life is shite. I think you can have that regardless of being single though.

Lucky you that you feel so much happier since dump, I think that is where most of us struggled the most, so you're already a step ahead so to speak.

Loobie that's great! He sounds keen. But no, don't get into their car on the first date! Argh! lease don't do that again, I will worry.

I was ticked by every man who went speeddating! Am slightly at this but has boosted confidence sky-high. Am actually getting a bit vain and up myself today, tbh. You should have seen me swanking it on the school run this morning.

Went shopping yesterday and was so naughty, bought 3 pairs of knee-high boots. This is ridiculously extravagent and I ought to take at least one pair back, but I caaaaan't....

I'm loving the visalisation success! Was he a policeman? I think I'm going to sign up to Uniform Dating where it's all firemen , policemen, etc.

ahhhh okay wasn't thinking was I??!!

Woo hoo to you getting ticked by every man and fab that you are feeling sky high

No don't think you should take any boots back, after all one pair may get nibbled by the alsatians that are always lurking in the corner waiting to eat us so you simply MUST keep them all.

No he's not a policeman last weeks disaster date that didn't like me was a policeman He is a site foreman for a building firm and is a carpenter by trade, cheeky looking but got his own house (apparently) and a nice car

Uniform dating OMG OMG why did you not mention this site before?? A hunky fireman yes i could just about fit one of those into my life. Not going to put all my eggs in one basket just yet because men let people down lol

Startingover I do still need the book I don't trust men all keen one minute all backing off the next so the book will be cherished and read from cover to cover.

It's still not been delivered yet though , postperson must be ........ a man!! grin

Yes, join Uniform Dating!! I just did and have already been "hugged" by a fireman and a policeman.

it's BRILLIANT

Plus i think i just found my dream job: Uniform Dating is looking for Party hosts, where you sort out local nightclubs to have parties in, then (ready?) VISIT ALL YOUR LOCAL FIRE STATIONS and police stations, etc, recruiting SINGLE MEN to come to the parties.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Then you go to the party and get them all their free drink, sign them up, find out their address and phone numbers, chat to them...

AND THEY PAY YOU FOR THIS!

What I'm doing next week, all dolled-up in my first date Dress:

"All households can receive a FREE Home Fire Risk Check, as part of our on-going drive to reduce the number of fires in the county.
.
UK National Fire statistics show that in 2003, 447 people died in accidental fires in the home. More than three quarters of these deaths were in properties without a smoke alarm, or with a smoke alarm that did not work.
.
Fires can be prevented and a Home Fire Risk Check will help you to do so.
.
The Home Fire Risk Check will involve a visit from your local fire station at a convenient time for you. Firefighters will use a simple questionnaire to look at potential problem areas in your home and offer advice on the installation and maintenance of smoke alarms. They will also give guidance on how to stay safe from fire including kitchen hazards, safe disposal of smoking materials, candles, heaters, electric blankets and dangers from harmful substances."

GIRLS, YOU ALL HAVE TO BOOK ONE OF THESE! Um, just to keep the DC safe...

Oh Beauty, you are deffinately my twin. I love knee high boots with a passion, only good think about the winter season. I always tend to be so torn trying to pick a pair that I end up buying at least 2 pairs at a time. Do not return, they will always come in handy. Use the secret, abundance in every area of your life! Money will come to you easily & effortlessly, do not fret.

Was indeed a fine sexy policeman that strode up my drive & planked his sexy arse on my sofa. I am deffinately going to fine tune those visualisations!! Nearly there!!

On a more serious note, incident on sun was sorted in that there will be no further access for now. Obviously this is best for dc's but v .

I am soo that you have access to uniform online dating!! Here's me trying to gatecrash the local fire station xmas night out.

Loobie, visualise a sexy man walking up your drive to deliver your book & the universe will dispatch your way!!

Ah Fuk, that's it, I'm moving to London!!!!! I am so , I want that job, I want firemen walking about my house!!! Will have to try & overcome & start visualising like fuk!!

Beauty, don that dress & boots & strut your stuff!!

Uniform Dating is nationwide! The fireman who "hugged" me was from Lancashire. GET ON THERE!!!

Right, everyone, book this Home Fire Safety Visit now. Get the number by googling "fire service + where you live" and find the relevent bit of the Local Council website.

I just booked mine. I said to the woman, "Um, so is it real firemen who come over?" She said it is. I said, "I'm going to wear so much make-up you wouldn't believe!"

That set us giggling and she went on to reveal:

• They fit (or move) free smoke alarms for you. Think girls: surely we need one in our BEDROOM?

• They turn up IN UNIFORM.

• They usually arrive IN THE FIRE ENGINE. (Honest!)

• THEY STAY FOR AS LONG AS YOU LIKE TO ANSWER ANY QUESTIONS YOU MIGHT HAVE. Like, "Are you free Friday night?")

DO IT GIRLS!

I'm going to be all glammed-up for mine, and start lots of questions with, "Well, since my husband left us..." and "Of course, as a vulnerable woman alone with small children..." etc.

Oooh, they check the safety of electric blankets too. I have one of those! On my bed! If I get the fireman in the right position, surely one quick push and he'll be on my bed, defenceless.

I'm inconsolable, I've checked uniform dating & not available here!! Am too distraught to visualise so I'm going boot shopping to cheer self up & will refocus on return.

Where are you? I just met a nice fireman
on there from Ireland.

OMG, how did I miss this, I can't even log on without first 3 digits of postcode. Am estatic, off to check again. Tell whoever he is from Ireland to wait, I'm a coming...

Looking up Uniform Dating NOW! And what a dream job

have to sadly say I had fire visit earlier this year when H still with me and in house at time

But can confirm several firemen turned up, spent quite a bit of time in house and fitted free smoke alarms - and were LOVELY! Need to move house

Loobie glad you had a great date but watch out for yourself - and dont get in cars for a while eek!

Beauty. 3 pairs of boots are a winter essential! Major result at speed dating - great to get more boosts in when you know its going to be wiping bottoms in the morning!

Yes I can beleive that you have an electric blanket that needs checked!

Staring - sorry about reults but at least some hunky men will be across your doorstep for the nexxt while.

Anyone doing anything great tonight - have an early night I think -start reading soem of the self help books -need them Have good weekends!

Disaster, just ended up creating profile on some weird sex online place!!! Computer will probably have crashed by time I return.
No uniform dating this side of water. Can't even get on to look at all those lovely bodies you girls are drooling over. Right am off in persuit of boots to console self.

Hi Mumfun, could you get them out again on some false pretense?? Am probably doing movie night with dc's followed by frantic visualisations!!

I don't know what to do tonight, am child-free but at loose end. Might have a beauty night and do fake tan, etc, as am out on the town tomorrow night!