My daughter has made allegations that my husband in abusing her, I can't find any support on the net. Please help!!!

[hurtandworried]

My 14 year old daughter has made a statement to the police that my husband has been inappropriatley touching her and making sexual advances towards her. Please tell me where I can get some support around how this is making me feel. I can't find anywhere on the net for this kind of thing.

.. and the OP is a bloke.

yes nabster absoluteyy totally sadly

Don't let desi hijack the thread. Esp for NABS sake!
The OP is still in the hotseat FWIW, NAB.

hurtandworried, have you told your daughter that you believe her unconditionally yet, and that you want her to press charges?

The other thing I'm is the Mon-Fri victim support deal. It is 24/7 so not sure why there is a limit on the vs for your dd.

Interesting Desiderata - I am coming to that conclusion too unfortunately. Have you reported it?

Molesworth .. the hunt is on. Sniff the air. A troll is under the bridge.

BANG !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

he did not have a solicitor present at interview

I posted only a while ago in support of HAW thinking she was being honest about her feelings.
I really hope she is being honest about all of this as doubts are planting in my mind - thanks Desi for being rational and making it clearer.
NAB - I hope for your sake this isnt a troll - if it is, in all my time on MN it will be the worst one I have seen.

Desi, everyone who is abused has it happen for the first time at some time. People aren't born abused, on the whole. And abusers differ - some are indeed sexually obsessed with prepubescents and small children, many others like to abuse people who may be sexually mature (ie past puberty) but who are in some way vulnerable or less powerful than the abuser. So it is perfectly feasible, and sadly not that uncommon, for a man to 'suddenly' start abusing a young girl once she has matured physically, especially around the time she starts to think of herself as a sexual being or behave like one. So it is all too possible for a bad man to change his view of a teenage girl from 'child' to 'sexually available woman' once she starts dating even when he has previously treated her as a daughter/niece/child.

(I don't know, wigandrobe talking at length about her child dying of meningitis in her arms is currently still my all time worst....)

no solicitor present at interview? Was this his choice?

nabs i can quite understand your reasons for wanting to do that.

desi and other self appointed troll hunters . you dont KNOW whether this op is telling the truth anymore than the rest of us.... although some of you feel able to pronounce about her daughter's truthtelling or lying as well as the op's honesty with great certainty. you may be right. you may be wrong. if you are sure of your rightness then perhaps the decent thing to do would be to leave the thread. you've made your views known.

and desi it's not v edifying to be spatting with another mner on this thread is it?

HAW, I don't think you are making this up, but I would suggest that you contact one of the many organisations that have been mentioned on this thread for the appropriate support that I think you are looking for.

If you are new to Mumsnet and this type of forum then it is almost...
...intoxicating to be at the receiving end of this type of interest. But it is best mobilised for less sensitive subjects - it will be at best intermittently helpful to you and you need to recognise that. Your story will be picked apart and questioned and pored over and I don't think this will end well.

I'm sorry for your troubles, but really, contact the trained professionals available to help both you AND your daughter.

oh thanks

i didnt see that one orangina and I'm bloody glad I didnt.

Nab: if you are the same Nab who has posted in the past about your unhappiness and difficulty with relationships (I am phrasing it like that so as not to either out you or insult you), then I think it might be best for you to put this thread on hide, go and do something enjoyable instead.

lol @ desiderata. Very 'rational', I'm sure.

god you're a real charmer desi. what exactly are you so v angry and aggressive about??

yes triff it was his choice

You'll love me one day, moley!

No self respecting solicitor (esp duty) would be 100% willing to damage their cred by backing a preditor of this callibre.
I'm not surprised he declined to have one present. It will all go better in court that he didn't.
He is very clever.

I can't find any mention of Gillick competence in relation to child sexual abuse cases (although I've only done a brief google on it so far). Anyone got any info on this?