I've just received a text from MIL which I think was meant for DH and it has upset me.

[Thishasupsetme]

The message said 'Looking forward to Sunday, I'll pick you and DGD up at 1.30pm for X's christening, remember not to mention it to DW'
DH has told me that he is going to take DD out for a few hours on Saturday to give me some time to myself, but it looks like he is going to his family members christening and I am not invited.
I didn't know I had upset anyone. DD was christed 6 months ago now and all of his family were invited and his cousin is DD godmother.
I am really upset. I don't know if I should mention it to him or hust leave it.

sorry and am with whomovedmychocoalte on this - why should thum move out?
dh is so much in cahoots with his mil he shodl get her to yank on the umbilical cord and get back home to her

sorry am for you thum.. this is unbelievable

Oh and def call your DB and SIL and get them round so that if he is shitty with you, they are there to help.

Why are you contemplating leaving?
Kick the arsehole out. Sounds like he and his mother deserve each other

Seriously, DO NOT LEAVE THE MARITAL HOME. Stay put with your DD.
Pack his stuff in bin liners.
Show HIM the door.
What a twat
I am so sorry for you

[shock ]

I'll have that one back.

Defective piece of crap.

THUM, you could phone the cousin and say something along the lines of,

"I saw a lovely and thought it would make an ideal christening present for _, what size/colour do you think would be best for him?"

you would then probably be able to tell from her reaction what was going on,

you wouldn't then be starting off the conversation about your exclusion from the christening, difficult I know but something I think you should do. If your dh isn't going to provide the answers to your questions, then calling the cousin will be a start.

I echo Pennies post, both the fucking hell and the well done. You are handling this brilliantly.

The poor cousin, she must be feeling awful too.

I feel so sorry for you, your H has betrayed you in the worst possible way. I would go so far as to say it is worse than an affair, as it was such a devious plan that he and MIL concocted.

He must stand up like a man and tell you why.

and for you

Sounds like his mother has a too strong a hold over her son and she is poisoning him against you - for what ever reason.. Some mothers cant let their grown up sons be men - I know 2 whose wives have moved them abroad to get them away from their mothers!!! Both brothers - their mother would turn up with her choice of paint and tell the wives it was time to re-decorate!!!
Kick him into touch - make him choose - her or you!

I reckon the MIL lied about her not being invited and maybe the DH doesn't know the truth

Hoping this is the case for you THUM

to the christening I mean, the only people who should feel like tits are your MIL and Husband.

Are they a family that ignores difficult issues - my inlaws refuse point blank to discuss rows or problems, they just studiously avoid the subject - that'sprobably why they are all bitter hags Perhaps your DH thinks if he keeps his head down this will blow over?

Personally I would go upstairs, pull the duvet off him and tell him he has thirty seconds to get up, come downstairs and talk to you about it or you will be citing this as the first act of unreasonable behaviour in the divorce petition.

sorry just read your post, must learn to type faster!

I would be packing his bags and kicking him out now!!

I can't believe that they could do something so low.

when do ou go to your brothers?

How could (D)H not know the truth. Surely he would know if she was unable to come! Afteral he said 'I didn't mean for you to find out like this'

I am with WMMC on this, kick him out, don't move out of the house.

Cowardly bastard

Sorry that should be haven't upset you and .

I have the feeling people are going to be wearing jumpers at this christening with the chill factor from various attendees at this rate - please don't allow your child to be dragged to such an event. You can't allow your kids to be used as pawns in your MiL/DHs little powerplays.

You have to talk to your dh now and find out what the hell was going through his head when he agreed to MIL's pathetic little scheme.

I take back what I said earlier - DO NOT phone your MIL.

If he refuses to talk to you then tell him to fuck off back to his precious mother.

DH must know the truth or he would have a simple explanation for his DW. He is being a twat and I would be packing his bag for him.

Just read and caught up with all this after feeding and putting DS to bed. Fuck me (excuse the french), I would get upstairs and demand to know why your MIL is such a nasty bitch that she would do this. If he sticks up for MIL or doesn't give you a decent explanation get the hell out of there with your DD. This is so disgraceful, she has lied to you and whats worse so has the one person you should be able to trust the most your DH. What a pack of bastards, I feel so sorry for you.
Your MIL probs knows by now if you have spoken to cousin. If she doesn't have the decency to phone you to explain then this whole situation was obviously intentional. Big hugs for you.

Call a taxi for an hours time, pack a bag for him and when the taxi rings the doorbell, make him answer then push him out and slam the door. If you can yell 'ya feckless loser' through the letterbox, so much the better.

oh Thum can't believe dh won't even discuss this with you. You are being incredibly reasonable imo. chuck him out (for tonight at least!) hugs to you ..

Bettybooo might have something there (clutching at straws) - the husband might genuinely think his wife wasn't invited, and when he said "didn't want you to find out like this" he meant about the christening which (he thought) she was not invited to.

Still pathetic and wrong of him to agree, if my DH was not welcome at a family event I would not go either.

I can't understand why your MiL is being like this Halloween was last week

Not mocking your pain btw, but jeez I thought mine was a uber-cow but yours is actually slightly worse!