I've just received a text from MIL which I think was meant for DH and it has upset me.

[Thishasupsetme]

The message said 'Looking forward to Sunday, I'll pick you and DGD up at 1.30pm for X's christening, remember not to mention it to DW'
DH has told me that he is going to take DD out for a few hours on Saturday to give me some time to myself, but it looks like he is going to his family members christening and I am not invited.
I didn't know I had upset anyone. DD was christed 6 months ago now and all of his family were invited and his cousin is DD godmother.
I am really upset. I don't know if I should mention it to him or hust leave it.

I cannnot believe this arsehole is not falling ove himself to ezplain whats going on?

Does he not care about how you are feeling, what a tosser.

I think there is more to this than meets the eye. Surely this cannot be just about a christening. He could have cleared that up by explaining all, thn got his mother dearest to call you and apologise.

Her not contacting you, and him pretending to be asleep so as not to discuss means ther is a whole lot more to come out methinks.

Poor you, am for you.

she def did not send it by accedent, If she had, she would have send a "OMG I am so sorry" one staright away, not given you a wall of silence.

He is acting like he has done something wrong IMO. If he felt bad about them not inviting you for some reason, he would have told you and would be trying to make you feel better, surely?!?!?
They must think they are very clever that they can all attend a Christening and you would be none the wiser.
I would follow through with the threat - but phone the cousin first and see what the "reason" is... then decide about MIL.
It is probably worth packing a bag for a few nights, then at least you and DD wont be around on the day.

I hope you are OK, and your DH gets his sad arse into gear

A couple of people have asked this but I don't think the OP has said whether he's got previous on this kind of behaviour. It is fairly relevant, actually, as to how she should proceed.

wtf? now question is to dh (mil is separate issue) and how far he was instrumental in this - its bad enough that he goes along with ti but was it his idea?

Fucking hell - it's not often I swear on MN but this is just unreal. What a bitch the MIL is.

That said your DH isn't much better for being complicit in this.

Well done you for calling the cousin - you're handling this amazingly.

THUM you need to go back upstairs and make him face this. If there's any future in your relationship he has GOT to fess up and tell the truth now.

I am appalled for you, I really am, you poor love

This is awful. I have put up with a lot from my dh but I could not forgive this kind of spiteful deception. It is disgusting behaviour. I am so and for you.

blimey

The MIL cooked the whole thing up herself & the DH went long with it? Or the 2 of them cooked it up between them?

Oh THUM, been reading this and feel for you so much.

What a complete wanker he is, but well done for staying so calm.

You can get some small satisfation that now members of your own mil's family can see her for the bitch she is

Right, well done to speaking to the cousin. And at least she now knows your MIL is a fruitloop

So, the issue is not with you and the cousin. I bet my bottom dollar MIL set this up. She probably saw it as the perfect opportunity for stirring.

So, time to wake dh (icy water if need be) adn sort this out once and for all.

OMG!

What nasty, horrible pieces of work.
I would pack a bag and get out of that house, taking as much stuff with you as you can. Enough to frighten the shit out of him.

When out I would then text MIL I think.

Poor you x

Sorry you're going through this Your DH is being a fecking tosser I'd be going back up and TELLING him to get the fuck downstairs.

WEll if cousin wanted you to come DH and MIL BOTH need to explain WTF is going on.
Go upstairs pull the blood y duvet off him and stand over and DEMAND a bloody ansewr and dont go away until you get one.

Your MIL is an utter cow. Now the cousin knows what is going on then hopefully the rest of the family will see that too.

Phone your MIL. If he is not talking you have every right to. The involvement of YOUR child is really sickening too.

OMFG! that is even worse! they where not trying to protect you, they where going against you!

Oh God, just seen your post!

Get up there, and tell him if he does not give you an explanation NOW, you are leaving.
Your MIL is such s hit stirring cow bad, and is probably LOVING this.
I really feel for you, you must be so hurt

THUM

Where do u live? I feel like coming round ur house and giving a really big hug after that last post, WTF is going on here? Go up them stairs and beat the life outta ur wank of a husband untill he comes out and tells u the facts, im actually sittin here livid, just said to my own dh all men are tosspots, he just looked at me lol.

this just gets worse by the minute. MIL and DH can't even claim that they were trying to save your feelings.

Your DH needs to start being honest with you now. He is acting like a 12 year old.

I think he is very much to blame in all this.

So MiL cooked the whole thing up!!! What a bitch!!

So basically MIL didn't want you there and your spineless (sorry) husband went along with it. Oh dear.

Have you rung your sister to pick you up yet?

I'm not a knee jerker, I don't shout "leave him!" to every poster whose husband acts like a twunt. Yours definitely needs to experience life without you for a few days though.

I actually think in some ways something like this is more hurtful than infidelity. Basically you're good enough to bear his child, cook his meals and clean his house, but you aren't really part of his family.

If he doesn't make with some serious grovelling I would seriously consider getting the locks changed while he is at work.

If he shows any interest in understanding why you are so upset, I'd say you need Relate together. He obviously thinks the world revolves around Mummy Dearest and needs to learn that it doesn't. It revolves around you and his child.

What a twat.

Sorry. xx

Here, have some of these:

[shock ]

Right, so the cousin seems to be in the clear. It just didn't add up that you could have offended her so badly without knowing about it.
But it puts your MIL in a Really Bad Light. And your DH for going along with it, as he must have known. What was he thinking of??????

infact - if I were you I'd go!