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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

40 yr old bachelor needs some advice!

634 replies

saracenandy · 21/10/2008 15:12

Ladies

Can you help? I seem to have long term problems developing relationships with women. I consider myself attractive, active, fit, successful in sport (ex pro rugby player) and business (MD of my own company) but am increasingly frustrated with women I have relationships with. Most do not last more than 3 months.

After a number of initial successes over the years, the ladies have soon lost interest or they just play extraordinary games. I have Tourette's, epilepsy and echopraxia, and when women discover this it seems to be the catalyst for ending what we have, even after things are going swimmingly. BTW my condition does not involve spontaneous profanities or major fits, and I do not consider myself a liability, just in case you wanted to go there! In most respects I consider myself normal. :-)

I have a very comfortable lifestyle but my generosity is often abused. I do not consider myself needy or emotional. I'm not flashy or advertise my wealth. I'm just a sound guy with lots to offer the right woman, so why is it all so difficult?

For instance, my current girlfriend problem is unusual even by my standards. She is 40 also, photographer, beautiful, very sexy, lots of fun, GSOH, and after 6 months I have fallen in love. Trouble is there is no intimacy between us. Last time we snogged was in May, and we've never slept together. She claims she has old-fashioned values, which translates as "I have to submit to her every whim, pay for everything, be at her beck and call, only go out or see each other on her terms etc, etc". Thing is, I don't succumb to her needs, yet she always keeps bouncing back thinking there's nothing wrong, when I tell her its over.

Is it me, or do women of my age not know the word compromise, and don't want to understand me?

Any thoughts or suggestions appreciated.

OP posts:
beaniescreamyb · 26/10/2008 18:28

what is the times article please? I came back and this thread is so massive I don't know what you mean.

ToughDaddy · 26/10/2008 18:36

TimesArticle

Flightattendant3 · 26/10/2008 18:37

I just read it and it's crap. He says we talk about Baby Dancing, which we all know isn't true - well very few of us use that expression.

Knob end.

ToughDaddy · 26/10/2008 18:39

I got bored reading it.

Swedes · 26/10/2008 18:47

Stop viewing each woman you meet as a potential life-mate. Get to know them as friends first.

ElviraInanEcup · 26/10/2008 19:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

beaniescreamyb · 26/10/2008 20:19

Thank you ToughDaddy reading now.

beaniescreamyb · 26/10/2008 20:22

Oh - it was a funny little article. I'm quite disapppointed, did the OP write it?I am a little confused.

ToughDaddy · 26/10/2008 20:36

No. The OP was suspected to be a wind up troll that had a few threads on the go last week. Someone said that the Times article might be the explanation of recent troll invasion.

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