40 yr old bachelor needs some advice!

[saracenandy]

Ladies

Can you help? I seem to have long term problems developing relationships with women. I consider myself attractive, active, fit, successful in sport (ex pro rugby player) and business (MD of my own company) but am increasingly frustrated with women I have relationships with. Most do not last more than 3 months.

After a number of initial successes over the years, the ladies have soon lost interest or they just play extraordinary games. I have Tourette's, epilepsy and echopraxia, and when women discover this it seems to be the catalyst for ending what we have, even after things are going swimmingly. BTW my condition does not involve spontaneous profanities or major fits, and I do not consider myself a liability, just in case you wanted to go there! In most respects I consider myself normal. :-)

I have a very comfortable lifestyle but my generosity is often abused. I do not consider myself needy or emotional. I'm not flashy or advertise my wealth. I'm just a sound guy with lots to offer the right woman, so why is it all so difficult?

For instance, my current girlfriend problem is unusual even by my standards. She is 40 also, photographer, beautiful, very sexy, lots of fun, GSOH, and after 6 months I have fallen in love. Trouble is there is no intimacy between us. Last time we snogged was in May, and we've never slept together. She claims she has old-fashioned values, which translates as "I have to submit to her every whim, pay for everything, be at her beck and call, only go out or see each other on her terms etc, etc". Thing is, I don't succumb to her needs, yet she always keeps bouncing back thinking there's nothing wrong, when I tell her its over.

Is it me, or do women of my age not know the word compromise, and don't want to understand me?

Any thoughts or suggestions appreciated.

I did pinch a man's shopping trolley in Aldi the other day though, that would have been a good way to meet him! Only I didn't realise I'd done it and he looked none too impressed (especially when he got to the checkout with all the things I'd slung into his trolley by mistake!)

i think my first post on this thread said no one can tell you how to find a mate

Steps to happiness

Connect
Developing relationships with family, friends, colleagues and neighbours will enrich your life and bring you support

Be active
Sports, hobbies such as gardening or dancing, or just a daily stroll will make you feel good and maintain mobility and fitness

Be curious
Noting the beauty of everyday moments as well as the unusual and reflecting on them helps you to appreciate what matters to you

Learn
Fixing a bike, learning an instrument, cooking ? the challenge and satisfaction brings fun and confidence

Give
Helping friends and strangers links your happiness to a wider community and is very rewarding

Dizziness
Walking round and round in a little circle is loads of fun!

Don't be afraid to be lazy too. Slob out every now and then with a DVD and a bottle of wine.

Guinness
Develop Irish accent and drink Guinness!

kewcumber- but it's TRUE! Look at how many posts there are under this thread- proves the point, doesn't it?

I agree with jazzicatz, lots of people are suggesting things that are right for them and you need to find something that's right for you. As i said before I met my husband on a round the world yacht race, I wore the same pair of shorts for four weeks, didn't shower or wash my hair in that time, and wore no make up. We both smelled pretty bad. We had no sleep, and were crammed with 14 other people on a 60' boat. Not everyone's cup of tea as a first date

no not really

it just shows how dull mn is at the moment

and that the premise of the thread was one that struck a chord with people who like to post

No. Honestfriend. It proves nowt.

Sometimes I see little people waving at me from under my shoe too.

Are they The Borrowers Rhubarb?

in fact the post about a gorgeous date flying an aeroplane in the park was started by a woman and racked up lots of posts

like this one a lartge number of them from me

well the only other thread I found remotely interesting was the humanist advert one - but them UQD is posting on that so maybe I'm in denial about my honeybee'ness.

I don't know, I think they were screaming. I had to stomp my foot to shut them up.

I think they might have been Norman's mates.

and any thread where people think it muight be a troll racks up posts fast

i have bumped up the posts about kk but that isnt very exciting

anyone else find it ironic that some posters are telling us we are being nasty to poor Andy (who appears to be quite capable of standing up to the vipers nest) and one is saying how we are clusterd around him like honey bees because he's a sinlge male (allegedly).

I think he is the whole of Saracens squad on an Iphone on a cold wet training pitch somehwere.

humanist advert

Did you miss a thread rabbit?

Anyway I'm just going to saddle up the bloated toad in the garden and squelch over to get the kids from school. After that I need to feed the mice who live in my nose hairs.

Good luck!

is that Ironic or am I being a bit Alannis Morrisette in my definition (sorry tired)

don;t know what you're on Rhubarb but pmsl @

"Dizziness
Walking round and round in a little circle is loads of fun!"

Amen - its now my new approach to happiness.

steps to happiness..... stop thinking about it too much and do things instinctively.

oh and the clustering around thing is what i call the Girls World (do you remember those?) phenomenon, we all love to do a makeover, be it cosmetic or personal.... or is it just me?

There you go saracenandy. 500 posts!

Bees round a honey pot is not meant to imply you all want him- just that you zoom in on his post!

Maybe it's the mothering instinct that you want to help him.