FAB & GLAM PART 8 - Onwards and Upwards!

[ginnny]

8000 posts - how do we find so much to talk about

Well i am glad there are a lot of lurkers - we just need to get you to come on here still.

McD - hope you are ok - please take the time to really think about what you want and dont worry if he likes it or not - i sense you are still 'fighting' for it to work and you are not completly happy with yourself for that.

Baffy - sorry about your cousin - i recently had a similar experience and it does put life into a different perspective - which can only be for the better.

Ginnny - hope he keeps up the good work - are you managing to talk about it so it does not allow the little things to get out of hand?

MHIS - hope is all ok with you - and again hope you are able to figure out why it all happened so it wont happen again.

Well h is on his final countdown at work - it has been ages and he is getting so bored (as am i) - but at least he is getting home at a reasonable time and there is little pressure.
He has also started to cut down on the alcohol - it was getting a bit out of hand - i think there will always be a problem but at least he is recognising it and taking (all be it) small steps in the right direction.

I am working a bit more until christmas which is helping with the pressie buying, as well as my self esteem.

Well another busy day today - it is lovely but v v cold here, but i am going to try and get all the dc out in the fresh air at some point - wish me luck.

Baffy, so sorry about your cousin. I've lost two friends in the past 6 years and recently heard another one - ex-parent at DD's school - is terminally ill. These funerals are the worst as the children are so young and the lost parent would only have wanted to live to see them grow up and be happy. It does make you think. My brush with cancer 10 years ago really was a turning point for me, I think - it made me feel I must do what I want to do, take control of my life, not drift along being what others expected me to be.

Hi.
Baffy- that's so sad about your cousin, and you are right, it does put things into perspective.
Fubsy - glad to see you again. Sorry you are still feeling down though
Dior - don't worry about a little slip up, you've done really really well.
Tannee - it sounds like going to Relate has helped dp realise he needs more help, which is a good thing. Hope he gets the help he needs and starts to see how lucky he is to have you in his life.
HW - at your trip! Glad you and H are getting along better now.
MHIS- sorry not been on MSN much lately. Its been very hectic and I'm shattered most evenings. Hopefully things will slow down a bit next week.
I can't believe the change in dp since we decided to try again. He's so different.
He's not got much work on at the moment but he's not drinking, he's keeping busy doing other things and he's just generally being his lovely old self again.
Its my step grandmother's funeral on Friday and as luck would have it he also has a funeral on the same day, but he is missing his and taking me to mine instead. The old dp would have gone to his no matter what as funerals used to be a perfect excuse for a piss up.
We are talking a lot more now and we're a lot closer than we've been for ages.
It just shows that you never know what's round the corner. A few months ago I was convinced that it was completely over and that he'd never change, but he has amazed me.

Ginnny, things sound so positive for you - really hope they keep up.

Fubsy, so sorry for you - all I can say is, some of us have definitely turned a corner in the past year - Dior, HW, Ginnny and Baffy (despite what she's going through) - that it really gives me hope for the rest of us.

No Relate for us tonight - counsellor is ill again. Am really feeling like we have lost momentum again as I have a possible engagement next Tuesday, so we'll lose another week. DP has been lovely the last couple of evenings, had a drink but only with dinner and shared with me. Haven't asked him whether he's had any further thoughts about counselling - I was going to do it tonight at Relate, but now think I must do it with just the two of us. As for the wretched computer, the lad who was going to fix it walked out of the repair shop on Saturday leaving his work undone - so his claims to repair it by today at the latest were just bullshit, nobody bothered to let us know until I rang them today, and God knows when we'll get it back. And the shop came recommended!

Feeling a bit - plus got an arsy email from a member of the public today, really insulting me - totally unwarranted. Not having a great afternoon, all told. But planning to make lasagne tonight, watch a movie with DP and ya boo sucks to the world !

oh tanee - feel so for you - it just seems to be the way of the world now doesnt it - no-one really really cares about anyone except themselves.

Try not to take the email too personally if you can. I am about to write a shitty letter about our hotel room.

When we arrived we were not met at the airport and then there was no room at the hotel - after a lot of waiting around the manager 'found' us a room - we were supossed to be very grateful to her for a room we had already paid for and had the booking conformation. She was very rude - i know she was busy and stressed but we had to thank her for her time - and didnt she make us feel unworthy of her time.
I am not after blame or anything but i just wish other people would at least understand how others may feel.

Hi

Can I ask what the criteria is for joining?

I think I may fit in here

Hi AreYouCallingMeDarling, we have one criteria here - the core group call ourselves the Teabags - because the longer we are in hot water, the stronger we get - if you want to become a stronger brew, jump in!

actually, that should be criterion (pedant's corner !

HW, yes, write that letter. Some people just get off on power - and they are usually such little, little people, really - tinpot Hitlers.

I have drafted a lovely letter for my boss to send the nasty emailer. He was pompous, dismissive of me and downright rude without any justification (he was just peeved that we hadn't managed to get him an instant response from the council - turns out he is always peeved with everyone). We decided that, whatever his problems, no one has the right to be rude to people who are genuinely trying to help (especially me, so kind, sympathetic, and hardworking - when I'm not checking up on MN ) and he should be told as much - so I/the MP will be telling him that, although she is happy to continue to try to help, his tone was extremely unhelpful and unwarranted, and it would be reasonable to extend the courtesy to her staff that they unfailingly extend to the public.

Was that well said or was that well said?

Just hope she agrees to sign it!

• thanks for the hugs Dior! Im glad some of you nare doing better, sorry some of you arent, but glad there are some familiar faces here! And I hope to get to know the newer ones.

Do you know Id forgotten about what Teabags stood for! Ive been wallowing in a AD numbed fug for so long - so now I am trying to do things rather than let them slide.

I have just ordered a truck load of supplements, including 5htp - didnt some of you try this, Im sure someone here recommended it, so i thought I would give it a try.

I am also trying very hard to make sense of my finances - I was sliding into debt, so want to get that sorted out.

The news on the XP front os that he is planning to move in with his NW after Xmas, so will be selling the flat I had to remortgage at great expense for him to buy. I really could kill him when I think of all the thousands of pounds he has wasted on buying it and tarting up the bloody kitchen - in a year, that is all he has done - and he had the gall to suggest I sell mine and buy his off him!

I want to sell mine, but the state of the housing market, plus the fact that he thinks he is going to get a wad of cash when i sell, is causing me nightmares atm.

areyoucallingmedarling - i have read your thread with interest and wanted to cat you anyway - (but still so bloody tight to part with the cash). If you want to cat me i would love it or if you can manage to find any of us on fb you would be able to get us as friends.

How are you doing now anyway - hope you are ok but suspect you are feeling a bit bashed and battered by the past few weeks.

Its all normal and you will find great support here - we have not all been through the same thing but mostly it is men troubles but we now try and focus more on getting on with our lives whist managing to still have these men in our lives. Think that sums us up.

Anyway welcome to all.

Tannee i will be writing that letter but i am not too good at it (being a lovely kind person too).

Evening all still lurking here from time to time!
Baffy no truer word said than life is too short definately!!

good to see you lilyloo, hope you're ok xx

come on baffy - whats up then!!
email me if you dont want to say on here.

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dior - all sounds normal to me
Had a couple of friends around yesterday and all we seemed to do was man moan - one of them was off for half term too and the other would have been murdered if he had i think.
So dont feel bad that you are not all lovey dovey - tis normal.

My h is in the bad books today too - he left fridge door open (again) and a huge mess in the kitchen.

Off to dentists today with all 4 of my children so that should be fun.

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How has the WW been going Dior? I tried Xenical for a little while, but all it did was let me kid myself that I could eat fish suppers etc without absorbing the fat. Si I am being referred to the Eating Disorder service.

I feel a bit of a fraud really as I just comfort eat, it's not like Im bulaemic or anorexic. But it might be useful to talk to someone about it.

Sounds like half term has been pretty much the same for most people - HW I took DD to the dentist on Tuesday, it felt like a children's party in there, with kids screaming up and down the corridor! Our dentist is really soft spoken too, so it was a bit of a struggle at times!

Dentist was a doddle actually - we were there at 9 am so the hoads of screamers had not arrived. And we were all healthy too so an added bonus.

Back on track next week doir - at least you know why it happened.

I know what you mean Fubsy im a comfort eater too still I guess if you learn to recognise the things that trigger you to eat then perhaps you can learn to avoid them.

It has to be said though that good food is just so damn enjoyable at the time I keep trying to persuade myself to hate the weight more than I love the food but its just not working...I did lay in bed this morning thinking "look there is no way you are going to be the kind of person who drinks water all day and sucks on a lettuce leaf so you are just GOING to have to excercise" So starting next week (kids back at school) im going to try to find the time!!

I was previously an extremely thin person but at the time walked everywhere and was much more nervous/unhappy - I guess I would rather be happy with a bit more weight.

Interesting (illuminating) thread on MN a while ago for those of us who may be heading towards a certain age about the link between weight gain and menopause/hormones. Of course im not quite there yet

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Half term and the onset on winter - see im back on here when I could be doing something more constructive with my time LOL

Have fun at your big bead show, im terrible if I get in "crafty" places and end up spending far more than I should (even worse if the children are with me as they encourage it) Do you get the red buying mist or are you more restrained?

So used to being on FB I nearly signed my name on this

Difficult one that Dior, if I had been younger, had easier pregnancies and more money I would probably have had one more but I knew it wasnt logical and I always err on the side of logic over emotion I was pretty ill last time and had the sneaking feeling another one would be stretching my luck.

To be honest the "not to late for me" joke was hideously insensitive but typical male humour.

No guarantees you would have a girl though are there and you could end up with an even more male heavy household

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