Would you message him after a lovely holiday connection went quiet?

[BigSpongyHelmet]

Name changed obviously as I feel really pathetic.

Recently returned from a solo holiday, met a really lovely man on the Thursday evening (I went home the following Saturday), whilst watching a live band and we chatted for hours about everything and anything. It all felt really natural, he was a little shy but we had a lovely time and I felt comfortable when he offered to walk me back (near to) my apartment. I'd had a few drinks as had he and he asked if I wanted to link arms as I seemed a little unsteady...I probably was to be fair, I was merry but as I don't drink often, it probably takes me much less to get tipsy than others!

Anyhoo, the walk back was 20 mins, in that time we went from linked arms to holding hands, chatted all the way about our jobs, friends, holidays, the fact that we were both single, and ended up sitting on a bench near the apartment until 4.00 a.m. just chatting. It was so lovely. The next morning he messaged me saying he'd had a lovely time and could he see me again, we decided to go and see a singer we'd both talked about the night before, so I met him at 4.30 in a seafront bar, had a couple of cocktails, saw the singer at 6.30 and then he asked if he could buy me dinner. Ended up at the same bar as the night before watching the live band again, didn't stop chatting and laughing and we also had a couple of snogs (discretely, it was very dark). He walked me back again, took a bit longer this time as we were constantly stopping for a kiss, he was a gentlemen, didn't try anything else, walked me to my door, bit more kissing, said he'd love to see when he gets home and then he said he better let me go as I was leaving for the airport at 9 the next day.

He messaged me whilst I was at the airport, said how lovely it had been to meet me and he really wanted to see me again and he'd message/call me when he got home (he was there until Thursday last week). I responded to say I'd really enjoyed meeting him and I'd love to see him again....and then nothing. And still nothing.

I have to say this has really hit me hard and I'm almost embarrassed to admit that, I really liked him and I honestly thought he would get in touch. My friends are in 2 camps, some have said message him (mostly blokes), some have said you messaged last, you made your feelings clear and he DID say he'd message you once home. I have stopped myself from messaging him so many times as I don't want to feel like I'm prompting him, but I would have really liked to see him again. It could have been all bullshit on holiday but then why text me when I'm on my way home.

We're both 52 for context.

WWYD?

Good luck, hope you have a lovely time! Is a yomp the same as a romp?😁

Don't text him OP, you desperado.

Lol kidding.

Enjoy your date/s! I hope it goes well.
And please update us! (Ignore the fruit loops on the thread).

I'm not sure, I'll let you know 😉

Gosh what a lot of negativity on this thread! Good luck on your date OP, I think he sounds like a good match and I hope you two have a lovely time together!

Contrary to popular beliefs (some of these posts!) there are a lot of good men around and I hope he is one of them :)

He called you @BigSpongyHelmet

Fucking Hell this has to be the biggest red flag of all. Calling you? Blimey!

😂

I am glad it's all coming together - I love a happy ending.

I've always understood yomp as just going for a walk, perhaps more energetic than a stroll on a tarmacked path. If I were to go for a walk on say Dartmoor (wish) I would say I'm going for a yomp.

In fact I now want to go for a walk on Dartmoor, it's a glorious sunny day here but sadly the sun would be set the time I got there 😭

Edited to say completely missed the point. Glad he's made contact and enjoy your date

Awww, this is a lovely update OP. I'm so pleased for you!

On one hand I think this is fab news, and go you! 😎

On the other, I'm eagerly awaiting to see what @ANNotherWritercomes back with this time 😈 🤣

I think you need a safe word too. Just in case, then you can post it here and we'll all know.

Well, @BigSpongyHelmet you are definitely totally invested now, I mean an evening AND day (and perchance another evening….). Just think what other more productive things you could be doing with your time…. 😉

Totally rooting for you having found a lovely normal, non scamming man of my own at 52. Mint sauce is my favourite condiment 😂

Isn’t this how people used to meet before the internet. Maybe not so much on holiday because of the potential to be from very different places but meeting in actual real life. This is actually how my aunt and uncle met. She was on a girls holiday and him a lads holiday in Spain. They exchanged landline numbers even though there was a good few hours distance between their homes. Bless my Uncle he kept to his word and called her when he got home. Her dad answered first. No mobiles to keep things personal. He then drove to see her every weekend and they were together for over 30 years until he died suddenly last year. My Gramps was stationed in Cyprus just after he met my nan and wrote to her every single day until he came home. I have the letters and they are very sweet. Not surprising my Uncle was just as lovely. I do understand that people are wary of dating these days but I still remember those love stories and keep the faith. Fingers crossed it works out for you. There are genuine people out there.

Sounds like he’s trying to steal your identity by finding out your favourite foods and copying your walk. Be careful OP!

Love the update! Have the best time! I do wonder how we’re meant to actually meet people if it’s such a bad thing to meet them in a bar on holiday?! Maybe there’s a secret club where it has been checked every man there has 0 red flags, will reply to every text within 4 seconds and has no previous life 🙄. Have a bloody amazing weekend and whilst it seems you aren’t anyway, please don’t let any of the negative stuff on this post put you off x

Message him! If you dont you will forever be tortured with what ifs. If he doesn't message you back then you will know he isnt interested and you wont see him again so youve no need to feel embarrassed! Good luck!

29 pages and 700+ replies and you don't think she may have done by now?

Are you on a time delay? 😀

Hooray, you did exactly the right thing… you’d have always wondered about him if you hadn’t messaged. He might be ‘the one’ or it might lead nowhere but enjoy the dates.

And I’ve no idea why others are being so weird, in the old days we just had to trust people!

He sounds lovely, OP, and I really hope this turns into something special.

I cannot understand the paranoia of some posters. I am all for identifying red flags when they are waved in your face, but making them up is bonkers. If we were all so suspicious, none of us would date outside our immediate social circle!

Lot of naive posters on here blithely assuming that Holiday Man is actually a human. Beware, OP, he may be one of the lizard people, hellbent on world domination one holiday romance at a time. Or, OR, a brain-sucking alien who's just grooming you with false pretenses in order to feast on the contents of your skull before discarding your lifeless husk in a wheelie bin and beaming back up to wherever he came from.

Now I'll have to sort what I am going to wear with our new gentleman suitor! 😂. Such fun following your adventures!

I had done that thanks 🙄 She hadn’t posted anymore so I was asking her direct if she’d post an update.

OP has posted 104 times in this thread...

Nice one. Not sure you'll get away with this one after 104 updates from OP, but good try😂😂

Love this, sounds like a lovely plan. Enjoy, and I look forward to the update.

OP is going to be on her 5th date and still getting people advising her to message him as nothing ventured nothing gained, and all that.