@mummy917 I asked Claude (AI) for you re the apps. HTH but have a good night out first before you try to sort this out! You are doing marvellously, BTW. I'm afraid I smirk reading about how well you are handling him. He won't know what's hit him - definitely don't be thinking he's out there having fun and coping fine, he isn't.
Do both parties have to verify their email to use a co-parenting app?
Yes, effectively. You can invite him by entering his email address, but he'll need to verify it and set up his own login before he can see or respond to anything. You can't operate both sides of the account yourself. If he never verifies, he simply won't be on the app — it won't work as two-way communication until he does.
Can she just supply both emails and then decline other communication?
Not quite in the way she might hope — she can't control his side. But the underlying idea is exactly how these apps are meant to be used: instead of texting or emailing directly, everything goes through the app, keeping communication on the record and documented. Once he's verified, she can legitimately stop replying to texts/calls about co-parenting matters and redirect him to the app every time. Messages are typically timestamped and unalterable — nothing can be edited or deleted — which is useful if things ever get contentious.
The catch: it only works if he cooperates enough to verify and check it. If he's being awkward, there's a real chance he just won't bother. Some apps handle a reluctant co-parent better than others, which affects which one's worth choosing.
Best UK apps and costs:
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*AppClose* – Moved to a paid subscription in January 2026, but still offers free access to parents facing financial hardship and domestic violence survivors, plus a 60-day free trial with no card needed. It has a "Solo" feature letting one parent use it even if the other never signs up — useful as a fallback if he refuses to engage, though it won't give her the two-way documented record she wants unless he does verify.
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*TalkingParents* – Free web-only plan with basic messaging and record-keeping; premium (needed for the mobile app and extras) is roughly £4.70/month. Low barrier for him to join since the core version costs nothing, and it's well-regarded for tamper-proof, timestamped records.
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*OurFamilyWizard* – The most established app and the one UK courts most often recommend or order, with UK-based support and GDPR compliance. Costs around £79–£99 per year, per parent (so he'd need to pay too), plus optional extras like ToneMeter (roughly £10/year), which flags aggressive wording before a message is sent.
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*2Houses* – Free option available, with paid plans from roughly £8–£10/month; decent value but not as widely recognised by UK courts as OurFamilyWizard.
My suggestion: Start with TalkingParents — free for him to join removes one excuse, and it has a strong reputation for records that hold up if things ever escalate. If he still won't engage, AppClose Solo is a reasonable fallback so she at least has her own organised record, even without his participation.
One practical tip: she should send the invite, then simply redirect every text or call from him to the app ("let's keep this on TalkingParents") rather than replying elsewhere. She can't force him to verify, but she can make the app her only channel — which gets her most of what she wants even before he fully complies.