Could partner be more supportive about travel fiasco?

[Oxycarpus]

I'm in a LDR with a man whose take home pay is 5x mine. I've just organised a holiday where we travelled solely by train from home then Eurostar to Amsterdam then Paris. I feel like I went above and beyond booking every leg of the journey plus hotels. Unfortunately, my train from home was badly delayed and I missed the Eurostar. His was fine and he got the Eurostar. In short, I've had to fork out a small fortune getting there by alternative means. He's offered a back rub to make me feel better but it would be nice if he chipped in to help me. AIBU?

@NoCommentingFromNowOn I put db as dear boyfriend. I should have put dp.

Ok, but even so a friend is a very different relationship, it’s not comparable to a boyfriend or partner or something like that.

You can't just "get the next" Eurostar. Well, she did, but it cost £250. If you've booked a specific one and miss it, you have to buy a new ticket. And you pretty much have to book Eurostar, it's more like a flight or a ferry than a train you just buy an open ticket and get on any.

I think the gold digger comments are unnecessarily unkind! I wouldn't expect a partner to contribute but it would be nice if he offered.

Effectively you've put a lot of effort into planning a lovely trip for you both and you've split the costs exactly 50/50. You've then run into an unexpected extra cost through no fault of your own and the result is that you've ended up paying more for the trip than him. I can see how that grates a bit, especially when you've done all the planning work and he earns a lot more.

Whenever I've been in a better financial position than friends I've always been happy to treat them to a meal out or pay a bit extra towards a holiday. I can afford it, I care about them, I enjoy spending time with them and I don't necessarily want to be limited to their budget. I'd find it hard to enjoy a holiday fully if I knew the person I was with was paying more than they could comfortably afford or stressing about costs.

A lot depends on how long you've been together and what your future plans are. If it's a new relationship, or if either of you already have kids I can understand being more regimented with going halves. If you're in an established relationship and you plan to start a family together at some point I might be a bit more concerned.

I'm in a LDR, my boyfriend earns more than me. It's worked out that I have to do a lot more of the travelling (I travel to him around 80% of the time) and BF suggested that he should pay my travel costs to balance out the time and effort I was putting in travelling to see him. I didn't feel comfortable with that personally so I said no but I really appreciated the offer - it shows he's generous, he recognises the extra effort I'm putting in and he values spending time with me.

I think it is actually fair to stay within the budget of the lower paid person. Higher paid person cannot demand a different type of trip and the expect the lower paid to meet them. But that’s not what has happened here.
I actually think in OP’s scenario higher paid partner has backed off organising the trip to avoid accidentally making OP feel pressured into something she can’t afford - but even that seems to have backfired.
OP, time for a really open conversation about what you’re both looking for. Is this whole issue actually another you wanting more of a partnership/shared life than he’s actually willing to give you?