Could partner be more supportive about travel fiasco?

[Oxycarpus]

I'm in a LDR with a man whose take home pay is 5x mine. I've just organised a holiday where we travelled solely by train from home then Eurostar to Amsterdam then Paris. I feel like I went above and beyond booking every leg of the journey plus hotels. Unfortunately, my train from home was badly delayed and I missed the Eurostar. His was fine and he got the Eurostar. In short, I've had to fork out a small fortune getting there by alternative means. He's offered a back rub to make me feel better but it would be nice if he chipped in to help me. AIBU?

This is what travel insurance is for. Claim your delay/rebooking through your travel insurance.

This is what travel insurance is for.

Just claim on your travel insurance.

I wouldn’t expect my partner to chip in but he would because that’s just what he would do, if he would pay food and drink etc for the rest of the trip. He does earn just under a week what I earn in a month.

Claiming on travel insurance isn't really a solution to the immediate problem that OP is down £250 now when she needs it.

Did you explain at Eurostar? Normally they would put you on the next train with no extra cost?

Yes this! First port of call should be the Eurostar help desk, most rail companies have an agreement to honour onward journeys and they would have full access to see that your delay was genuinely caused by another network operator and should offer you a reissued ticket for the next available service.

Can you claim on your holiday insurance? It might not be worth the excess of course.

But, basically, no I wouldn't expect it at all.

If it's a cultural thing for you then asking random people probably not from the same culture isn't going to give you a lot of insight I wouldn't think.

You also sound a bit as if you expected him to pay more because you organised it. Which is weird.

If I was your partner I would assume you’d sort this through the train company or the travel insurance. My responses would be of the “god that’s so annoying for you!” style. I might ask if you need to borrow some money till pay day.
I really wouldn’t see it as my job to pay it back as there are clear channels for you to do that.

Because last minute tickets on Eurostar cost that amount.

The train from A to London was £60, which she gets back. But train companies don't cover consequential losses. So she had to buy a new Eurostar ticket.

Though I'm pretty sure train companies do have contingency for this with onward journeys.

If you won the lottery would you share your fortune in some way? If you gave your adult children money would you call them gold diggers?

I read it as she mentioned his salary because he can afford to pay her extra travel costs and she expected him to offer

Giving adult children money from a lottery win is completely different to your situation

Yes. You are unreasonable to expect this. Wouldn’t occur to me.

I would if anyone asked for it. The difference in the scenario you’ve described is the ‘giving of’ not ‘asking for’.

Do you actually have insurance?

How long have you been dating? What is the norm for you both - 50/50? If that’s how the relationship has been so far at most I’d expect him to pay for dinner tonight to help ease the blow.
I only ever dated men on similar pay to me until I met my DH, so things were pretty much split but more in a I’ll pay tonight you pay tomorrow. But as I say he earned loads more than me and when we’d been dating a couple months we went to Rome for the weekend. He paid for it all.

If he earns 5x what you earn, I wouldn't pay for half the trip.

And are you both of the same culture?

ETA I see you’ve already answered

No, I wouldn’t expect this. But I would hope that next time you meet up he shoulders more of the expense of the travel and other costs knowing you have had some unexpected expenses. Dh and I were long distance for 2 years. I mean, really long distance, 11 hour £800 flight away from each other. At various times one of us was in a better place financially than the other. Whoever was better off did more of the travelling or carried more of the costs of seeing each other than the other one.

£250 is hardly a small fortune! Pretty standard holiday contingency cost that you can stick on a credit card. No way would I expect anyone else to pay if I was in this situation, except possibly my travel insurance.

Then it’s something she could claim from her travel insurance surely?

Kids are not a boyfriend…..

You are an independent woman. You earn the wage you do so have to cut your cloth accordingly. Please don’t demean yourself by expecting a man to give you money just to make things easier for you. He is not your husband/civil partner and has no financial obligations towards you.