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Partner wants me out and I do not feel able to cope alone

117 replies

Purplehearts45 · 05/06/2026 13:33

He keeps trying to chuck me out the house he said your gone after I made a mess several times in the bathroom . recently I spoke to some people at a shop they asked if I was okay so I told them a bit about my situation, the girl at the shop said I could talk to her anytime so I said some things about my situation he then said he wanted to talk to me the people at the mushroom shop had told everything we both said to him he said he had enough , he said this is why we have to move on I feel betrayed by the people in the mushroom shop they misquoted what I’d said he was angry.

He also he I was very miserable a while back he said we are selling the house as I came home after a few bears I was a bit tipsy my daughter was being cared for by him . I can’t do anything right I have no friends as they are ignoring me as they are busy my neighbour is in a bad way and wants to be left alone I’ve only got him and my daughter, my mum is too busy to see me very often , she told me to toughen up which wasn’t helpful she told me not to cry over losing my family and the house he says I go on about myself which he calls me a nightmare but I’m struggling I got discharged from mental health services recently they said I’m fine I’m not I’m taking antidepressants my antipsychotic s and benzos I’m only taking about my self as I’m struggling and looking for support I’m feeling scared about losing my family and my home , a social worker has tried to get me a flat by myself but that wouldn’t work I need supported accommodation i really wouldn’t cope living on my own

OP posts:
MissMoneyFairy · Yesterday 10:04

Purplehearts45 · Yesterday 09:47

I couldn’t help it I cleaned it up for fucks sake I’m not expecting him to care for me

But if you don't expect him to care for you then you can leave and live on your own in the flat the social worker found for you, why are you staying in a house that is so unhappy.

PinkFrogss · Yesterday 10:06

Think of your DD having to constantly witness all this.

Are you not willing to move into a 1 bed flat for her sake?

It seems you want to punish your ex by staying and forcing him to care for you, but in doing so you are punishing and hurting your DD.

Please engage with services OP, if not for your own sake then for hers.

Jellox · Yesterday 10:18

OP can your social worker not help you get a place of your own?

You cannot live with him any more.

If you refuse to leave then he may have no choice but to get the police involved and cause you more stress. You don’t want your DD seeing that.

Speak to your social worker today and ask if she can help you contact the council and get some different accommodation.

Leave your DD where she is.
And focus on doing your new place up, so that she can eventually come and visit.

You are risking having DD taken away from you if you do not get proper help and actually listen.

ALovelyPinkUnicorn · Yesterday 10:59

MissMoneyFairy · Yesterday 10:04

But if you don't expect him to care for you then you can leave and live on your own in the flat the social worker found for you, why are you staying in a house that is so unhappy.

This, why can’t you cope on your own then if you don’t want him to care for you?

PinkFrogss · Yesterday 11:03

Jellox · Yesterday 10:18

OP can your social worker not help you get a place of your own?

You cannot live with him any more.

If you refuse to leave then he may have no choice but to get the police involved and cause you more stress. You don’t want your DD seeing that.

Speak to your social worker today and ask if she can help you contact the council and get some different accommodation.

Leave your DD where she is.
And focus on doing your new place up, so that she can eventually come and visit.

You are risking having DD taken away from you if you do not get proper help and actually listen.

OP’s social worker helped them find a 1 bed flat but she turned it down to remain living with her ex.

Its a terrible situation for all 3 of them and OP is the only one who can do something about it, but unfortunately refuses to engage with the help she desperately needs.

LittleGreenDragons · Yesterday 11:11

Purplehearts45 · Yesterday 09:47

I couldn’t help it I cleaned it up for fucks sake I’m not expecting him to care for me

I’m not expecting him to care for me
So why do you stay? You've admitted previously you can't look after your DD and your ex has sole custody but that doesn't mean you can't see her if you live elsewhere, so what is stopping you?

Keroppi · Yesterday 11:14

Move out it sounds chaotic

Jellox · Yesterday 11:34

PinkFrogss · Yesterday 11:03

OP’s social worker helped them find a 1 bed flat but she turned it down to remain living with her ex.

Its a terrible situation for all 3 of them and OP is the only one who can do something about it, but unfortunately refuses to engage with the help she desperately needs.

That’s so frustrating!!

OP is only making things worse for herself and it’s a shame she can’t see that.

howshouldibehave · Yesterday 12:15

Purplehearts45 · Yesterday 09:47

I couldn’t help it I cleaned it up for fucks sake I’m not expecting him to care for me

Cleaning it up is different to trying to clean it up.

If you’d actually cleaned it up, he wouldn’t know it had happened.

You are expecting him to care for you and he doesn’t want to. You need to leave asap.

Random321 · Yesterday 13:04

You need to take your perscribed medication and no other drugs or alcohol.

You need to contact your social worker, GP and mental health crisis team.

You say you can't cope leaving alone but you don't seem to be coping as you are either.

Take the support of those who can help you. Perhsps you need to return to the mental health hospital and habe a phased and supported move to your new accommodation.

MissMoneyFairy · Yesterday 13:09

Thus is great advice but I'm not sure op can or will listen, it's very chaotic and we get no clear answers to any of our questions

PetulaGordeno · Yesterday 13:36

MissMoneyFairy · Yesterday 13:09

Thus is great advice but I'm not sure op can or will listen, it's very chaotic and we get no clear answers to any of our questions

I just feel for her, life for her sounds horrific. It seems she had no friends and no support in real life.
It must be awful for her and upsetting for others who clearly can’t cope.

StillNotDoingIt · Yesterday 13:42

Purplehearts45 · 06/06/2026 16:50

I’m not wallowing in self pity I don’t ask him to look after me and she didn’t see have explosive toilet issues I cleaned it up your post is harsh for someone who is in a horrible situation

But why did you shit on the floor in the first place?

You’re not going to get much useful help if you can’t explain what is going on.

And please, what on Earth is the mushroom shop and why do you keep mentioning it?

Balloonhearts · Yesterday 14:54

It doesn't matter if the reasons he gave you are unfair. He doesn't want to be with you, that's enough reason. You not being able to cope alone is not his problem. He is not responsible for your wellbeing. You need to leave and stop inflicting this shit on your poor child.

drunkelephant83 · Yesterday 15:22

Do you take mushrooms on top of all of your other medication? Surely you don’t do those around your child. What country are you in?

Hallywally · Yesterday 16:53

OP you have been posting about this for years & have been given lots of advice but things never seem to change.

FayeMumsnet · Yesterday 17:12

Hi there.

We'd like to thank everyone who showed such kindness and concern for the OP, as it really does make a difference. If anyone has been affected by anything in this thread, our mental health resources are here.

Best wishes.
MNHQ.
💐

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