Life360 Shows DH Spent 59 mins in Thai Massage

[Caramelsyrup]

As the title says. DH away abroad with some friends. Checked life 360 this morning and showed he had spent 59 minutes in a Thai massage place. Took all the screenshots and sent a friend. It’s not on Google but on street view with a number. It’s not looking good is it??

What does that mean though?

If my DH and I do our own thing I just see that as completely unremarkable. There's nothing naughty about it, in a good way or otherwise.

How strange. I get sports massages quite often, and never once have I been offered masturbation as a natural part of the process. I wonder why, when it's apparently so normal? 🤔

Wow, some of these replies are bonkers. Who goes on a lads holiday and books in for an innocent Thai massage after a night out. I can’t work out if people are trying to wind you up or are they genuinely that naive!?

Its pretty obvious what he’s done and why he’s gone silent on you. But from what you have said he’s clearly got previous for this type of stuff so if you keep staying with him he’s going to keep doing this. Surely by now he’s done enough for you to just leave him? I don’t understand why women are so eager to catch their partner out but still stay with them each and every time. It’s sort of pointless isn’t it?

And on the sniff..pathetic.

What to do:

• Protect your physical health, so don't have unprotected sex with him until he's had STI testing - there isn't any point in testing until there's been long enough for an infection to develop which is at least two weeks. (Exception: if you don't want him to know you know just yet and you're willing to take the risk and get STI testing yourself later)

*Also in protecting your physical health: make sure you can't get pregnant.

• Think about finances together and apart. Would staying for a bit help you save a meaningful amount of money to help you with eg. a deposit on a new house?

• You don't have to separate if you don't want to - if you can live with a partner who does sexual things with others when away from home. You could say nothing and let life continue as it is 'don't ask, don't tell' style. You could tell him you know, book a holiday yourself and be clear you now understand your relationship as including the freedom to have sex with others when away from home.

• I suspect with the previous cheating you're heading for separation because he's not behaving in accordance with the rules of your relationship and he's lying to you. The question is going to be over timing. Do you want to split now? Do you want to stay for a bit to save money? Do you want to stay till your youngest child is closer to adulthood even though you can't see yourselves together as a retired couple?

• I assume from what I've read that he's not abusive (other than cheating = STI risk to you) so maintaining a reasonable relationship working out how you can co-parent together would be a better idea than terrible arguments.

Im extremely naive 🤣 would he be there longer or shorter?

@Soontobe60 If he had been visiting a brothel, believe me he wouldn’t have been in there for 59 minutes!

Weird comment. That's a normal time for someone to be in a massage place or a brothel.

@Lins77 How strange. I get sports massages quite often, and never once have I been offered masturbation as a natural part of the process. I wonder why, when it's apparently so normal?

Women are not offered extras because virtually all women would consider that sexual assault.

Extras are only for men.

Half hour /hour+
All sorts of prices
I was friends with a sex worker way back not through her work I may add.

59 minutes just means he was waiting for his mates to finish.

It's gaslighting at its finest.

I was not being entirely serious....

Yes because this is clearly the correct thread to have a joke and a laugh 🙄

Okay, my post was more offensive than the bloke who said a handjob was a normal part of a massage. Mea culpa.

I have much sympathy for the OP, it's a horrible situation for her.

Ok so I have an update.
He hasn’t replied or been in touch today so I rang him. He answered and sounded drunk and I asked where he went last night, he said he went to bed, I said before you went to bed? He said I don’t remember! So I asked where he was and he said in a bar, so I said what bar? And he asked a THAI SOUNDING LADY what was the name of the bar? I said who is that put her on the phone?! He started laughing saying what are you on about?! I said put her on the phone, and I think he actually went to put her on the phone and her Howard her saying’No no no I don’t speak English!’ Anyway I shouted I know what you’re doing and he just laughed and called me an idiot!!! How the hell can he think this is funny?? He doesn’t know I can see life 360 where he was yesterday. Ironically that is the only place it’s showed his location for 59 mins the rest is just walking and where he’s walked to and from, not places he’s stayed at. I can’t see where he was then when I rang as it just showed where he’s walked had been walking. I’m trying to think of logical explanations for all this and don’t want to believe he could be so awful but sadly I think he is!!!! Hope this makes sense I’ve typed t all quickly. Feeling very much in shock

I can’t understand why you’re in shock. This is a pattern of behaviour. He sounds utterly sickening. And to think he is father is depressing. Use this time to start formulating a plan.

Ducks in a row my queen and he's cooked. I am so truly sorry. Bastard!

I’m going to suggest tomorrow he doesn’t come on the holiday next week. I will go on my own with my daughter. Our DS is staying home. Could get away with saying he has to work or something. I don’t want to see his face tomorrow as at the moment all I want to is repeatedly punch his face in

Darling. Can the holiday be postponed at least? Do you have a support system IRL? I feel for you. You can't ever come back from this. And never give him access to you again. Not your kindness, your warmth, your soul or your body. He's now your enemy. I'm truly sorry he's done this to you my love. One day you'll be happy he's a distant memory. My inbox is open. Please be strong

you don’t suggest he doesn’t come. You tell him he’s not going on holiday with you. If booking is in his name and he says he’s going, you say you’re not

So sorry OP.

Don’t allow him to come on holiday. Keep him well away.

Don’t punch him. Just divorce him.

That's unfortunate that Life360 wasn't showing his location when you heard him with the Thai sounding lady. Has it updated yet?

He laughed at you?! When you could hear another woman?
You cannot be complicit in his behaviour. You are right to say no to him going on holiday (he's got a lot time of work hadn't he).
Work out how to separate. He's already checked out but it's easier for him to stay.