Has anyone in their 30s met a partner through hobby groups?

[HeartbreakingCat]

Any time I read a thread about dating the general consensus is to meet a man in real life and to put yourself out there and go to hobby clubs/groups to meet a man. But has anyone actually met a man at a hobby group/ hobby club? I keep being told to join clubs to meet men instead of online dating but who has actually met their partner this way? I don’t think many men in their 30s join clubs but maybe im wrong. If they do then it’s probably sports related? And im not sporty or interested in sports (that also includes walking and hiking) so what clubs / hobbies do women in their 30s join to find a partner? The type of things im interested in is probably not going to attracted the type of men im interested in, if that makes sense! And I also don’t want to join something im not interested in in the hope of meeting a man (if a man did this to meet women he'd be considered a creep) Would be nice to know how many people in their 30s have actually met a partner at a hobby group?

I know a lot of couples who met through am-dram groups.

I think you need to think "one step removed" and just aim to meet more people without having "meeting a partner" as the primary objective. One of the problems of life becoming more online is that circles of real life acquaintances have narrowed considerably and relationships with others have become more one-dimensional/ transactional

e.g my flatmate married a guy I used to work with. If I had wfh then I almost certainly wouldn't have socialised with him to the same extent and it's likely they wouldn't have met.

Even if you don't meet anyone I find that people with wide real life circles are the happiest.

I've tried one of those sports watching events for singles. Didn't work at all, everyone just watched the screen and didn't socialise.

I really dislike sports so why would I want to end up with a man very into sports if I don’t like it? I am open to other stuff though

I met DP through a creative writing event. Not a group exactly, but an event a similar group of people attended regularly. I know two couples who met through a ukulele club.

do you live in a town/city with a good arts/community scene? If you do, maybe pick something at random and go along. Just to experience something different. Widening your experiences will widen your interests etc etc

I met my dh playing an online computer game (World of Warcraft). That was 18 years ago. We are still together and we still play!

I don't think there is anything wrong with using dating apps OP, its just there is quite a lot of chaff to weed through on there, doesn't mean you won't find any decent guys though.

My friend met his current partner at a D&D club. Honestly people say that because there’s not much else to say. You can meet people through the apps/online or at a bar or at clubs or through a friend/family or through work.

Thats about it. There’s very little chance you’ll find them sat in your house, doing nothing new or never changing who you meet or where you go.

Does this supposed femosphere cause women to murder men? Or go on shooting sprees? If not then they’re really not comparable

“they're the ones who take the message on-board”
What message is it that you think that these men are taking on board?

Even if the ”Femosphere and pink pilling” women’s groups exist, and I’m not sure they do,
are these really comparable to the incel/manoshphere, Andrew Tate type men?

Do you feel the same about the gym?. Maybe classes - as well as the more vigorous ones you can do yoga, Pilates etc

I know a number of couples who
met there in your age group

We got together through volunteering but we were quite a bit older than you

Yes that includes the gym.

The sweet spot for this is nerdy hobby groups that attract a reasonable gender balance - I know couples in their thirties and beyond who met at things like historical reenactment groups, a gilbert and sullivan society, and a sea shanty singing club. If you can deal with quirkiness (which i very much can 😁 hence knowing so many people in these kind of groups) this sort of thing is a good bet. Climbing/bouldering clubs are also pretty balanced - my BIL met his partner at one.

See im unlikely to be attracted to a nerdy guy no offence to anyone im really not being mean when I say that but can’t help attraction, thats what I meant by my hobbies aren’t really the things guys in attracted to would be at. Ah maybe I will stick to online dating

My DD met her DH through a hobby. She’d just come out of a long relationship and wasn’t looking at all - I’m pretty sure that helped!

Ahhh so you only like buff sporty men but you hate sports. That will be part of why you’re finding it so hard.

No none of the men ive dated have been gym goers or even particularly fit by the have been into sports like football etc my ex was not exactly a buff gym guy but also wasnt nerdy or arty etc

What a weird thing to say if you're not a 14-year-old mean girl. Why wouldn't you be attracted to someone with so-called nerdy hobbies? Because your hobbies make you so irresistible?

What are you even looking for in a partner? What kind of life do you want to have with them? Maybe the problem isn't where you're looking, but what you're looking for.

Me - skiing
Best friend - reeling
Sister - sailing club
BIL - Dog training - is that a hobby?

You seem overly focused on how much you don’t want to do a sport. There are hundreds of things that you could do that aren’t a sport.

Any suggestions then? Ive said not sports but people have continued to tell me how they met their partners at a sports club my thread ask for suggestions other than sports… it’s not my fault i have to repeat that

It’s not weird, if I wasn’t attracted to a sporty guy would that also be weird?

Reading group?

Friend of mine belongs to one in London and there's quite a mix of people who attend

Must say I tend to be in the find when you are not looking team. 🙂

As my main hobbies are barre and pilates, I never had any luck meeting men that way.

I did meet DP out in the wild though (at a rave) rather than on an app. I was 35.