Friend upset after I reported hacked account to the police

[ThisHappyBiscuit]

So my sons account got hacked by a friend of mines son who gave the details to someone to hack into. When this was all happening I said if my son's accounts password isn't given to me then im guna have to contact the police and my friend said "do it". So I did call when I didn't get the password. Ive gone upto my friend today and she's said do you really think you should be talking to me? I said why what's the matter? She said well we are under criminal investigation cause of you and we shouldn't be talking. I said well you told me to contact them and she said well it was to shut you up (in so many words) cause you were going off on one. Im really upset because I thought she was my friend and im just so lost now because I literally have no friends outside of my life. Can I just have some friendly words of encouragement because I'm just so lost and feeling so alone right now.

No, but that's not what's happened, is it?

If I spoke to the kids parents and they effectively told me to eff off, yes I would.

Because, as others have said, how else are the little shits supposed to learn?

Id called the police well before id gotten everything back and resolved myself. At first it was very difficult due to user error mainly my sons in terms of inventory needed sorting to accept things back. Ive not blown any friendship up when there wasnt really one to begin with, ive recieved no apology and I had to sort it all myself. I got told to contact the police by her herself and she told me that to shut me up. Which again isnt a friend in my opinion. This situation just revealed a person impersonating as a friend.

You need friends who:

• Communicate literally, rather than writing hyperbolic statements and acting surprised when you interpret them as literal instructions.
• Share your strong sense of right and wrong and so take responsibility for their children's actions and try to make amends.

You also need to more closely supervise your son's internet use. I really mean that. Roblox is full of paedo creeps.

Why have you not explained what the misogyny was?

Every day's a school day! I did not know that.

I thought it was a separate, lesser offence.

It might not be "hacking", which no one ever seems to want to define, but it is denial of service and misuse of someone else's account.

You cannot use the police as a “telling off” tool, you report and let them decide the actions.

In what way am I making the thread about me? Oh wait, I'm not, I'm on topic, talking about why going to the police is justified.

I didn't spot the OP's murder comparison. So sue me.

This is entirely true.

It's also still OK to call the police. If the parents won't do the telling-off and cooperate with resolving the issue, they are failing to parent properly.

I don’t understand why you didn’t just reset the password?

Sue you? I literally answered your question.

I cant believe the other mother doesnt seem to give a shit about her son's part in this.
Yes, son son gave his password to his friend, which was silly, but what his friend did was also very wrong. You would expect his parents to feel he needed consequences for his own part in the whole thing.

So he clearly knows what he’s doing and this can’t be passed off as an “accident”!

But there is no indication there was no consequences or they didn’t give a shit. Not wanting to involve the police doesn’t translate to doesn’t give a shit.

Ditch the friend and her shit of a son.

To do that at 10 or any age is a bastard thing to do.

Obviously impress on your son never to share passwords with anyone apart from you.

Well, I'm not surprised the friendship is over. Just surprised that OP is surprised.

Then there is no issue here, so why the thread about how you’ve lost a friend?

No she gave him his phone back and he went to football practice to play with his friends. There were no consequences. We didn't receive an apology again no acknowledgement of ownership.

Ive obviously not lost a friend have I since shes not taken any accountability for her son's actions and hasnt communicated with me effectively. Ive just lost someone impersonating a friend.

So she was wrong and should have handled it better. You are not wrong for reporting it. In fact I’d say that was the right thing to do.

However, you are bonkers for expecting her to still be your friend. Her and her son’s actions have consequences and so do yours. It doesn’t matter if you are right, your actions have consequences.

Youre right, im just sorry I even did it but I feel like if I didn't I didn't have my sons back.

My reaction to finding out my child had done something like this would have been mortification. Then I would have made my child transfer the items back and give the account back.

Her saying ‘do it’ about calling the police shows she was never a friend in the first place.

Thank you, the thing is i interpreted as she sent it like it meant like she proper wanted me to do it as well. It was "just do it xx" so I took what she said literally. It was more so about the boy not giving my son his password so he could have access to it again. But because her son was complicit in it by giving the details to another child hes now being investigated. But I couldn't just let this slide and it be ok he did wrong for it to possibly happen again in future to another unsuspecting victim like my son. 🫶

I can imagine you didn’t receive an apology or accountability because by that time you had involved the police and she didn’t want to keep speaking to you. Right or wrong, I wouldn’t be continuing contact with you when we were on opposing sides in a police investigation.

Seriously, why would you want her as a friend. Raise your bar.