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Original poster

Never want to live with a man again?

151 replies

RosesAreRoses · 13/04/2026 23:59

Im not even dating yet so this is a bit silly but I was talking about this with some people and I basically said I would never ever live with a man, I have children but even if I didn’t I would never move in with a man or have a man move in with me ever again. But according to people I was talking to this would be a deal breaker for them and they wouldn’t want to date someone who never wanted to live together? Im obviously not going to change my mind on this but does anyone else never intend to live with a man ever again? I just couldn’t live with a man again. Does anyone else feel this way?

OP posts:

HotRootsAndNaughtyToots · 14/04/2026 00:00

Lots of women feel the same way!

CrikeyMajikey · 14/04/2026 00:15

I still live with mine but if that ever changes there’s no way I’d live with another one.

Original poster

RosesAreRoses · 14/04/2026 00:46

Thanks both, it was other single mums so it surprised me as I assumed most single mums would feel the same and wouldnt want to live with a man again but apparently for them it would be a deal breaker. For me I’d only want to live together if we had children but no more for me so I don’t see another reason for me to live with someone personally.

OP posts:

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 14/04/2026 00:59

The main reasons people move in together are costs of running home and to bring up children together so if neirher are an issue then you’re right it probably doesn’t make sense. Unless in your old age after children moved out you met a man with a much nicer home in a better location would you be tempted or would you just stay there often but keep your own?

Nat6999 · 14/04/2026 01:02

Me too. I prefer my own company, tbh when ds left home it didn't break my heart as much as I love him, I can choose myself what & when I eat, what I watch & what I do. I love it when he comes to visit but there comes a point that I'm glad when it is time for him to go home, I find making conversation exhausting at times. I can't see a time now that I will ever have another relationship, it would take someone very special for me to put up with them or them put up with me.

Brightandblustery · 14/04/2026 01:02

Absolutely. I've been single for nearly 10 years and love my peaceful life (despite living with two stroppy teenagers). I don't intend to ever date again, let alone live with someone.

Friendlygingercat · 14/04/2026 01:15

I was married for a very short time when we divorced by mutual consent. No children. Its not as though my ex was horrible or abusive. I just could not bear the idea of blivng intimately with the same person for years. Full stop. I infinately prefer my own company.

Heraldry · 14/04/2026 01:19

My DP and I have been incredibly happy, and deeply committed, for over ten years, not living together and never plan to. Do I sometimes wish my life had worked out differently, yes, but I also know how fortunate I’ve been finding the strength to do my life on my own with my children.

Meadowfinch · 14/04/2026 01:37

There's nothing unusual in that. I feel the same. I must attract the dregs because most of the men I meet don't want an equal partnership. They are looking for an unpaid housekeeper, a personal banker or both.

But that doesn't stop you dating. You never know, you might meet a rare exception to the rule. Just don't voice your views anywhere they can hear. Their job is to convince you they are desirable enough. That's how relationships work.

bornwithhorns · 14/04/2026 01:40

I just don’t see any man ever doing anything that would make me want to live together.
im so happy
living with my teenager and dogs I just wouldn’t see how it could ever work, im set in my
ways now and used to being single I think.

ForTipsyFinch · 14/04/2026 05:52

Absolutely not. I would rather do nearly anything else 😂 I have lived with one man, not recently and I didn’t enjoy it. Not only did it make more work, it just made me realise I need my own space, so even if the man did an equal amount of housework etc it would be a no.

GlovedhandsCecilia · 14/04/2026 06:07

RosesAreRoses · 13/04/2026 23:59

The thing is, the people rightly said that for some people it will be a deal breaker. Then you asked other women if they feel the same as you.

Even if we all feel the same as you, it wont necessarily mean that there are men who would have us. I think it would make more sense to ask people if they'd be with someone who ruled out living together from the start of the relationship. Would it be a deal breaker if a man said "I will never want to live with you"?

GlovedhandsCecilia · 14/04/2026 06:09

Sorry are you suggesting that the OP doesn't tell prospective partners that living together wil never be a possibility?

Highlighta · 14/04/2026 06:14

Maybe it's their age OP, are they on the younger side?

For me there is just no chance of a man ever moving in with me. I'm not looking to date anyway but if, just if I were to meet someone, he would stay living in his own home.

I think age does play a part as I have no need to live with anyone. I run my own home and manage myself just fine. But a younger person might still want more children, not be financially secure enough to run a house alone, feel the pressure from their age group, not self assured as yet etc etc.

For me, no-one is going to upset the calm and serene I have built for myself. It took a lot to get to this place I am in now, so that is never going to be put at risk now. I am the happiest now I have ever been in my adult life. Why would I risk changing that.

JennyForeigner · 14/04/2026 07:01

I'm newly separated with children but can confidently affirm with every single fibre and cell of my being that I will never live with a man again.

SortingItOut · 14/04/2026 07:05

When I split from my husband 8 years ago I vowed never to love with a man again, lots of reasons including my children (who are adults) but also I don't want to get caught up in the mundane.

I've dated in the past and make it clear from the outset that I want a LAT (Living Apart Together ) relationship.
Some men want the same and some don't and thats completely fine.

I wont ever change my mind so its better to be honest from the start.

There's a Facebook group about LAT, its definitely more common in other countries.

DreamingOfGeneHunt · 14/04/2026 07:08

I couldn't live with anyone again. I'm perfectly happy to be in a relationship with someone but I won't ever live with them.

Nowvoyager99 · 14/04/2026 07:16

God no. Never again.

Hito · 14/04/2026 07:22

I'm male and wouldn't live with anyone ever again.

Globules · 14/04/2026 07:23

I'm currently loving my LAT relationship. We both have teenagers/young adults and moving in together just isn't what either of us want.

I love that we date. I love when he stays over. I love that he goes home.

I love that I don't have to argue about unloading the dishwasher or tidying up.

That may change in the future as the children leave home, but it's right for now and the next few years at least. He knows that, and he's happy with that.

I've been informed on MN that my relationship is just a bit of fun and we're not going anywhere because we're not looking to move in together at any time soon. So be prepared for that attitude from others if you do start a new relationship.

Stripes84 · 14/04/2026 07:27

Before I met my DH I had lived with two men over a decade in my mid 20s to mid 30s. Both were incredibly unhappy experiences. I am happy now, but as a PP said, if that ever changed or something happened to DH, I would not contemplate living with a man ever again!

SparklyGlitterballs · 14/04/2026 07:32

I'm older, early sixties and I was widowed two years ago. It wasn't a great marriage and I definitely wouldn't want a man living in my space again. I like having the bed to myself (with no snoring bed-hogger), being able to do what I want, when I want. I can choose what I want to watch on the tv, eat what I want to eat, and decorate the house to my taste at last. I have no piles of hobby stuff lying around, and no heaps of clothes on the back of every chair. Wouldn't have it any other way.

greyweek · 14/04/2026 07:33

I can’t imagine my mum living without my dad. She relies on him too much and he is genuinely her closest person, her support network.
It’s sad but I am sure I’ll never get that from a man. It’s basically accepting a long term dream is never going to come true. May be, men were brought up differently a couple of decades ago?
I live with a man but had to adjust my expectations a lot and I know I’d never live with another one if the situation changes.

Changingplace · 14/04/2026 07:39

I’m in the process of splitting from ‘D’H and honestly the idea of living with another man isn’t on my radar at all, I’m just not interested.

I lived on my own before and loved having my own space, I’d potentially date again, too soon to say really on that but I have no interest in living with someone.

SatelliteSpaceman · 14/04/2026 07:51