Friend posted a harsh message in group chat after my apology

[70Cats]

Group of friends (6) for 10 years. One is ultra sensitive borderline professional victim. I thought I’d upset her recently so before the others arrived I apologised. She replied very angrily, so I explained that I was shocked at the incident and apologised again. She was very aggressive so I explained that she also upset people. She stopped when the others arrived.

We sat for two hours chatting and laughing.

When I got home there was the most awful post on our group chat saying how I ‘launched a passive aggressive attack under the guise of an apology and could not put up with such unkindness so would leave our group but would welcome seeing people for coffee’.
Shocked, ripped to pieces, sick I was devastated. On a group chat for my friends to read. How could someone do that.
I feel so strongly about this I am thinking of seeing a solicitor to sue her.
Please talk me down.
.

I thought I’d upset her recently so before the others arrived I apologised.

Say what now?

A solicitor? For a WhatsApp group chat comment? Jesus Christ...😆

You sound like a huge drama queen. A solicitor? Take a few breaths, get a grip, and move on.

No one is obliged to accept your apology.

To be posted on group chat:

My apology was sincere, but badly received. As I am no longer 12 years old, I refuse to engage in any more discussion of this matter. Hope you all have a lovely Easter 🐣 😊

And they call us litigious. 😂

You both sound like drama 👑 s here.

If OP had posted this in AIBU, I know what the final vote would have been . . . .

So you felt the need to apologise and the moment she arrived early you said sorry. Then when she explained yes, you had in fact upset her. You told spoke for others and essentially told her off because she upsets people too?

And youre surprised she wasnt happy with that ambush?

This friend you quiet viciously describe as "ultra sensitive borderline professional victim"?

So shes realised you arent really friends, said she found your behaviour unkind (didnt call you names or anything) and was leaving the group chat.

And all you care about is what everyone else will think of your behavoiur. And, by your own version.. its an actuate if biased interpretation of what happened. What exactly would you sue for?

This whole story.

A solicitor, I actually can’t 🫠🫠🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Type a group reply that’s covers all the points you’ve made here AND point out that her hypersensitivity has probably played a part in her bizarre post.

Sue her for what though?

Jesus.

Shocked, ripped to pieces, sick I was devastated
I am thinking of seeing a solicitor to sue her

And she's the ultra sensitive, professional victim?
Lol.

I was wondering the same...

I agree. Take a few days to get over it.

Shocked, ripped to pieces, sick I was devastated

Over a group chat post? Take a step back, this (as well as the solicitor) is a massive overreaction. She's dramatic, so are you, best avoid each other.

She sounds unhinged and I’d say you’re better off without her. Let her leave the group and I expect you’ll all enjoy it more without her! Next time you see the others just explain what happened. Leave her be.. I couldn’t be bothered with someone this dramatic or self interested!

If this happened in any normal group of friends, surely everyone would be like, Barbara, what the hell are you on about?! And then everyone would give her the fade because they don’t want any of this crazy falling in their laps. Of course, you can’t sue her. 🤣

I'd just put in the group chat "I'm genuinely at a loss as to how you could have seen our conversation in that light Sharon and I'm upset that you would say these things about me"
Then leave it.
The others in the group will be blowing up your phone (and hers!) for the details. When they do, take care not to malign her. Just stick to your guns that you apologised because you thought you upset her last time, and she clearly took it the wrong way, and you're upset by what's happened. Say as little as possible and nothing that could make you seem in the wrong. Confused and sad is best.
They will then no doubt decide whether to be team you, team ex friend or keep out of it and see you both separately.

You’re not going to sue her, don’t be so silly.

I’d probably give it to her with both barrels on the group chat and then block her.

I’d add a little extra intrigue “ I am genuinely at a loss as to how you could’ve seen our conversation in that light, Sharon, and I’m upset that you would say these things about me particularly in view of the things that you shared with me”

Yes. That's naughty. But i like it. The OPs phone will explode!

Interesting that you call her ultra sensitive borderline professional victim but then say you're "Shocked, ripped to pieces, sick I was devastated. On a group chat for my friends to read. How could someone do that" and are considering seeing a solicitor because she ended your friendship and gave her version of events in a small group chat.
Dependant on what you did to her, it wasn't a nice thing for her to do but you're reaction is very over the top. One may say you are ultra sensitive borderline professional victim.

Indeed to the solicitor @£350plus vat per hour.

Quite!