I agree with the others, this is an escalation as he is sensing that you are developing an awareness and setting boundaries.
I also agree that you need to get out, even if only for a little bit. This is for your physical safety, and to give you some distance from the psychological horror of not being able to go to bed at night safely and walking on eggshells. It might seem like an impossible task so perhaps think of it only for a day or two at a time.
Leaving long term might seem like it’s too difficult - you’ve cited money issues in the past. But there are I’ll be financial support in the form of benefits and also child maintenance payments. You’re probably thinking that there will need to be an adjustment of lifestyle to you and your children, which doesn’t seem fair. You’re right, it’s not fair, but it’s a loving act. Your children will not begrudge living in a smaller home, doing less activities, but this will not harm them. Staying in your household (no matter how much you claim it won’t) will harm them. Psychological safety is everything, and sometimes the most permeating effects from childhood comes from children not knowing which version of a parent they will be around from one moment to the next. This will then affect their adult relationships, and so on, and so on.
it really does seem like the scales are starting to fall off your eyes. One step at a time - get yourself safe before the next stage of the cycle begins.