We all know that one person that always orders the most expensive thing when someone else is paying, but… extreme content 😂

[AliceR1]

What is it with men and being totally reckless with money? Guy and I, known each for about 5 years, went exclusive about six months ago. It’s his birthday next week so I said I’d take him out for a birthday meal out. He picked the place so I knew it wasn’t going to be budget but what I wasn’t planning on was him ordering a £100 bottle of wine followed by more by the glass. I wasn’t drinking as I drove there and back. He knows I’m not in the poor category but that’s essentially down to extreme budgeting, which he’s well aware of. It was a nice mea out, totally ruined by me still internally stewing over the fact that I picked up a tab the equivalent of a monthly food budget for me and two kids and totally put me off sticking around him for a moment longer. We do get on but this really narked me.

He's an inconsiderate user.

he should be embarrassed behaving like that but he sounds like he's one of those thick skinned insensitive types who won't give it a second thought.

youve only been formally going out with him for 6 months, think what it would be like in 6 years time.

I hope you'll bin him, pronto.

He drank a bottle of wine plus two further glasses, which trend to be at least 175 size if not 250, so at best he drank one and a half bottles of wine. Even when I was an alcoholic that would have made me visibly drunk. Wine is lethal. He absolutely would have been very drunk.

How excruciatingly cringe for him poncing off his friends - I don’t know why you were worried about your mutual friends as I predicted earlier they will already have had the measure of this cznty character.

Executed, zero time for this 🚮

I'd have got up and left him drunk as a fart in the restaurant with his own drinks bill to pay.

"Nice knowing you, Bob, don't bother contacting me when you're sober, we're through".

Nice one!

Ditch him! But not until after your own birthday treat

20 stone, hence the absorption. The rose tinted glasses are off, the benefit of the doubt gone. Morbidly obese waste of space who’s been employed for 3 months in 7 years, reliant on UC and bailouts. The house he lives in is in a trust of his 8yo, who can technically kick him out in 10 years time. My bad, I really need to start seeing people for who they are.

I feel sorry for his kids

No no it’s done. He’d probably be out of funds at that moment in time!

Raise those standards op. You deserve much better than that. Glad you’ve dumped him.

You sound like a nice person, but stop giving away your power! You made all the decisions that turned you into a doormat here and took money away from your kids. You could have spoken up at any time and said no. Start being nice to yourself, putting you and your kids first.

Unless he is a stratospherically amazing lover and had already booked your 100,pound plus spa break for your birthday, you are better off loosing this loser.

@AliceR1 you said he went back to yours, obviously you don’t need to answer this - but did you actually sleep with him after he did that?

I think if you did - respectfully, you need to examine why you did that.

It’s one thing not saying anything in the moment when the bill came out as at that point you’re probably a bit shocked and thinking what’s done is done, but I can’t imagine why you’d go on to lay down with this man after that.

If you didn’t - good!

And how tall is he? I ask just because you said his weight.

You already knew him, I doubt you'd have swiped right otherwise.

He's too stupid to realise he got lucky.

That’s going to be my new line with anyone, any gender, I meet: I lost 20st 😂🤣

A word of advice for the future if you’re treating someone always just stick to meals only. That’s what I do as a non-drinker. I know the price of alcohol can be ridiculous and I’m just not paying for someone’s drink, so I say I’ll take them out for dinner but emphasise they can get the drinks in - which is basically just their own drinks since I’ll usually stick to water.

Also more importantly a man with a poor work ethic is usually a red flag. I don’t care if it’s seen as snobby but I don’t date unemployed men. I’ve been unemployed and I was just trying to graft and focus on improving my situation , not going on dates.

Yeah well my bad… perceived obligation not to ruin a birthday because ‘all his birthdays have always been shit’ I got momentarily manipulated. Just under 6ft so his man bits are buried in lard anyway, if that’s what you’re thinking. As I get older I’m taking less crap, but still too much.

According to the BMI calculator he would have to be SEVEN feet FIVE inches to not be overweight at 20st.

Tell me he was 7ft 5 inches @AliceR1!!!

Ugh - I am so sorry! Perhaps you were still a bit stunned over it all.

I have definitely been a people pleaser - although mostly in friendships moreso than romantic connections . I sometimes cringe at the disrespect I’ve allowed, but found talking it through with a counsellor or a safe friend really helpful and unpicking why I made those choices. So I can choose better next time.

Well done for getting rid of him now though. Better late than never.

Op said he was just under 6ft 😂

You’re absolutely right - man who doesn’t have money, will take yours. When we first met over five years ago, he was a bum on UC and I made it clear I was not interested in pursuing a relationship. Green light given when he got a job last summer. Lasted three months. You then obv get involved and I’d feel like an arse dumping someone because they’ve been laid off (though facts and reasons unknown). He’s a waste of space who’s been employed likes to take the piss, if opportunity arises. Trust me I’m cured. You know when you get the ick, properly, I’m past the no return point. I got a mild ick after I run out of a 12 bottle case of red for indoor drinking that vanished in the space of six weeks, possibly less, and I have minimal amount… then it ran out and I thought no, I’m not replacing, and he rocked up quite clearly expecting a re-stock. That’s when it really started. Then I thought, I’m still doing every single job in the house that’s going and came to realise there’s very little in this for me. And last night was the final straw.

I’d do the same for my birthday.

No, BMI of just over 38. I messed up. I’m 23 so we’re not like two fat slobs rubbing each other’s bellies.

You poor pet.
I have so much money, no stealth boast at all, but i wouldn't leave this go.
He is scum of the earth.

I feel so sorry for you. Please please share with mutual friends.
Don't let this go.

Thats how cheeky fxxkers like this get away with it.