Found my own engagement ring, what do I do?

[Boymum2811]

My partner and I have discussed marriage quite a lot and I know he'll ask in the near future. We went shopping a few months ago and ended up in a jewelers, and I saw an amazing ring I liked, for a bit of fun I tried it on with a couple of others as I'd never really known what would suit me and thought it was harmless fun and if he knows my size plus an idea now of what I might like, then it's much easier for him to choose something, in the future.

Fast forward to 2 days ago a delivery guy knocked on the door, asked me to sign for a parcel and HE TOLD ME "it needs signing for, because it's expensive gold from Ernest Jones" firstly what an absolute Twt for telling me, but also my other half what a Twt for not being more discreet.

There was 1 rings I loved and that was wherr it was from, I burst out crying as obviously the surprise was ruined :( he was also gutted and fuming this happened and has put a complaint in and was told all packaging was discreet.

Do I accept that the surprise is now out of the bag and just leave it to my partner decide what to do about it, or do I tell him to send it back and then just leave things to happen naturally. It just doesn't feel special anymore, like this to me should be an exciting special moment for us both, but we're both left feeling upset and flat about it.

Am I overreacting? Should I just suck it up and be happy he's made such an effort to consider what I wanted.

I feel so conflicted about the whole thing!

Ernest Jones shipping packaging is discreet and generally not identifiable as being from a jewellery company, though specific gift packaging options may have branding.
Online Order Packaging

• Outer Packaging: The outer delivery boxes used for online orders are typically plain and unbranded to ensure security and discretion. The return address on the parcel will not explicitly state "Ernest Jones" to avoid indicating the valuable nature of the contents.

In summary, the external parcel you receive via delivery partners like Royal Mail or DX will not give away the contents.

Your life must be hard work if this is your reaction to something not going how you envisaged. Lots more opportunities for fate to intervene lie ahead: the wedding, childbirth, anniversary celebrations, family Christmasses.

This makes no sense. It could just as easily have been earrings or something for your Xmas present. You didn't have to open it and look at it.

Didn’t RTFT but read your updates…why can’t the proposal still be a lovely, romantic moment chosen by your bf? You knew he’d propose in near future, you chose a ring (kind of), you didn’t know when it would happen. What has changed? You bf can put the ring away and propose when the moment is right, just as he would have if you hadn’t found the ring.

Feels like a marketing ploy. All news is good news, etc

The doorstep delivery is not engagement day. You know you’ll get married one day. You will have the ring of your dreams.

Your partner doesn’t have to propose now. He can put it away and do a romantic proposal when the time is right. Catch you off guard - down on one knee as you turn round from the cooker, on a country picnic, on a holiday etc or splash out on something grand. You aren’t marrying the ring you are marrying him.

You have discussed marriage and even tried on engagement rings so how was a proposal ever going to be much of a surprise?

You also have a child together so I would assume you discussed marriage quite a while ago

With respect OP you need to get a grip

And this is is why I don't like online shopping. (Misses the point of the thread)

I thought that this was about losing your engagement ring, replacing it, then finding the original.

Do I accept that the surprise is now out of the bag and just leave it to my partner decide what to do about it, or do I tell him to send it back and then just leave things to happen naturally. It just doesn't feel special anymore, like this to me should be an exciting special moment for us both, but we're both left feeling upset and flat about it.

Why do people these days make everything so unnecessarily complicated?

Is this him?

Now there’s an oxymoron. You’ve ruined the surprise that I’VE CAREFULLY PLANNED. Good luck being married, that’s one looooooooong ruined surprise. Guessing you don’t have kids yet. I won’t say a word: don’t want to ruin your surprise.

LOL!

This, although my first response to the original post for "for fucks sake!"

So you talked about getting engaged. Chose a ring you like. You know it’s going to happen and with the ring you’ve chosen. I really don’t understand the issue? Nothing at this point is a surprise.

Is it an actual ring in the box?
maybe a piece of jewellery for someone else
🤣🤣🤣

You burst out crying? Massive ott reaction

Could be a cock ring....

It's normal to be disappointed that the delivery guy let the cat out of the bag - anyone would be in the same situation. It's also funny at least with time.

Your call on how you want to proceed, send it back and start over if that's what you prefer.

Marriage is a big step and it is not about the ring or the proposal. It is about building a life together. You already discussed marriage and tried on rings. It is not a surprise. Why weren't you just happy he picked out the ring you loved? Honestly you don't sound emotionally mature enough to get married.

They already live together and are parents. I actually think those are very big steps!

Cheer up OP just because he’s got a ring doesn’t mean he mightn’t change his mind about proposing.

(Just joking but I hope it’ll give you a sense of suspense unless and until it happens.)

You’ll laugh about it in a few years time! Let things just happen as he planned. If you put so much pressure on things to be perfect, your wedding planning, wedding day and everything beyond it will be exceptionally stressful. The proposal is one moment in time, and your wedding is just one day- what matters is the rest of your lives.

Sorry OP but get a fucking grip. There are people with genuine problems out here 🙄🙄🙄🙄

We can only hope they were tears of joy.

So your boyfriend (now fiance, I suppose) bought you a ring that you told him you love. He's declaring his love for you in a most thoughtful way and asking you to marry him.

What's wrong with you! Give him a big kiss, put the ring on, and now you are engaged.