My partner is angry because I wont tell him my Bodycount

[northern2025]

He has repeatedly asked me and I haven’t answered him but now he has sat me down and said think carefully exactly what you say and wanted me to talk about my sec life since I was a teen, when I am mid forties now
I have been single for quite a bit of this time and had several short term relationships
he is making me feel anxious and isn’t speaking to me now as thinks I can’t be trusted

If he is not ecstatic to be with you and has energy for this nonsense he is a waste of your time and trying to belittle you - you are worth more than this insecure man

Absolutely. Leave. 🏃‍♀️🚩

OP do not go into 2026 with this vile man.

Dump him now so you’ve got a couple of weeks to get over him before Xmas.

Then between Xmas and new year make a plan of the new you.

Then make 2026 your best year.

"I have thought carefully. And concluded that this relationship is a really crap one and I don't need this shit. Goodbye".

If you could and did give an exact and truthful number, he'd call you a liar. Listen to your friends and get rid.

he wants to use it against you whatever the number is

sounds like an andrew tate wannabe

Please get rid of this fuckwit. You don't need him.

He's not talking to you so just block him everywhere and stop talking to him. You know that there is no acceptable answer to his question. No amount of detail is going to make him believe you are telling the truth. Nothing you say or do is going to make him start treating you with decency and kindness. You are not making each other happy and never will. End it. Get support from your friends if you find yourself weakening.

OP, please please please do not tell him, you NEED to stand your ground on this, telling him will not make him shut up or help him trust you, I had the exact same situation happen to me at the start of a relationship, as you said every single thing was dissected and it was an excuse ‘to not trust me even more’ it never ever got better and I never lived anything down, and it wasn’t anything out of the ordinary. Please don’t give in X

I know that at Christmas it can seem like everybody is paired up or with family - the reality is that people often don't get on with their family and sometimes put up with dreadful behaviour from their partner and people are at each other throats by Boxing Day. Honestly, he sounds very disturbed. At
least you have friends who care enough to tell you the truth. Breaking up with this dreadful man is the first step in finding a much better nicer and kinder man to share your life with rather than this loon. I think the bottom line is that he doesn't make you happy, does he?

I mean... I'd actually dump a guy just for using the word 'slag'.
Shows an appalling attitude to women's sexuality that is never going to be fixed and will taint any relationship he has

Walk away. No good will arise from this relationship. You know this.

Tell him 500 and then tell him to fuck off. What a cunt

@northern2025 I have lived through this and it never ever ends.
Being cross examined. This reply being compared word for word against the last reply. Questioned about penis size, orgasms, body type and on and on and on. The more honest I was the more ammunition I was giving him.

He absolutely believes you to be a liar and if he just could ask the right question it will prove it. It will consume him. Damned if you do and damned if you dont.
Don't be me.

Make your only answer, 'This isn't working for me anymore, have a great life and don't contact me again.' Then block, block, block.

Well who gives a shit? Just pluck a number out of thin air. Then leave him.

Get as far away from this controlling ass hat as fast as you possibly can

It's great that you don't live together - so it should be easier to end it (particularly since he's told you he doesn't love or trust you). Given that this abusive, misogynistic prick is pushing 50 I'd be very interested to see what a Clare's Law application would reveal about his past. I bet he has a history of being abusive to partners. Run NOW!

I have The Ick and he’s not even my partner.

He sounds chilling but also like a snivelling insecure loser.
I find it so frustrating that the worst of these knuckledraggers always seem to be rewarded by getting to be in a relationship with decent but long suffering women.
For the love of God, OP you can do better. Being alone is better. Kick him to the kerb.

Honestly he sounds potentially dangerous. His way of questioning seems very loaded, he’s looking for information that he can use to be abusive towards you (which you’ve confirmed).

Please extract yourself from this relationship as soon and as safely as possible. He’s only going to get worse.

I don't know I feel honesty is important for a relationship.

Your partner sounds really unpleasant OP.

But on the body count thing - well it's very much related to age and how many long relationships you have or haven't had, isn't it?

Mine is pretty low but that's only because I met my partner at 22. If I'd spent longer not being in a long term relationship (and instead had more shorter relationships) then it would probably be higher wouldn't it? Wouldn't mean I was shagging about every night.

It's just simple maths to some extent.

Ewwww. RUN

Get rid of him. He sounds like a misogynistic arsehole.

You don't live together, great.

"This isn't working for me, I wish you well, Goodbye"

And block.

He doesn't deserve all this time and headspace OP. Take some time out to work on your self esteem. Ironically you have the perfect excuse - "Thanks, but I've recently ended a relationship so I'm taking some time for myself"

Love, I've been here, exactly here. You need to leave. He is abusive and this will get worse. This is going to feel so overwhelming I know but this will not get better.