Potential marriage with a very wealthy man… but I’m physically repulsed. WWYD?

[ForeverHopeful3]

33F, about to be 34. Single as a pringle.

But, my family friend just proposed a guy (38) from an extremely wealthy family (millions, big business). She said the family is good and he's their only kid.

THE PROBLEM: I’ve seen a couple of pics + a company video of him and my honest initial reaction was “ew, no”. I’d rate him 2/10 by my usual standards. Maybe a 3. Overall, I feel zero physical spark... I've tried to find one picture of him where I think he looks even just a little handsome and I can't. Even his voice was a turn-off for me in the video. I couldn't make it to 30 seconds😭

Part of me thinks I should at least have one coffee in case attraction grows or I’m being too shallow. The other part feels it would be dishonest – like I’d only be forcing it for the money/lifestyle. I also don't want to waste his time or give the family any sort of false hope :(

Would you meet once anyway, or is zero initial attraction an automatic no, even when the man is literally a millionaire?

I have tried to go on dates with men I didn't find initially attractive in photos but attraction has never grown on me in the past. Usually after 2 dates, I call it quits :(

Ever thought he might not fancy you or do you think you are irrisistable ? Leave the poor chap alone.

I met my husband online. I wasn’t remotely attracted to him but his initial message made me laugh, and unlike the hundreds of other messages from men, didn’t mention sex.
we chatted for a while and I enjoyed talking to him but I told him that while I enjoyed his ‘company’ I wasn’t attracted to him. He was fine with that and we carried on as friends.
he was going to be in my area for work so we met up. He made me laugh so much that I was doubled up, tears running down my facedown my I fell in love with him in the aisles of Tesco and we married 6m later.
he will never be my ‘type’ but I fancy him so much and 14y on we are still as ‘active’ as we were when we met, probably more to be honest 🤣

Met him and see if you get on, even if you don’t become a thing you could find a friend.

before I met my husband I was with a millionaire, lovely bloke, treated me amazingly but he just didn’t do it for me at all, we had NOTHING in common. So I ended it. I’d rather be with someone who I can chat to and have fun with.

we’re very poor but we love each other and still laugh every day.

Your not attracted to him don't go on a date simple.
I dont understand how marriage has even come into the equation you have not even meet this man.

WOW, just WOW.

Also, 9 pages of responses and not one follow up post by the OP. I call BS.

If this is real, I sincerely hope he doesn’t have the misfortune of meeting you for a coffee!

Meet him, why not?

But tbh, we all choose our best pics to post so I wouldn’t expect much of the meeting…

I'm sorry that's been your experience, but it isn't a universal truth, it's just your experience. Plenty of men in loving rll, respectful relationships

That.
it is obviously someone having fun with the forum 😂

Move along folks, nothing to see here.

Why would he want to marry you? You come across as very shallow and not very nice, he probably won't like you, never mind you not liking him 🙄

my grandmother told me marrying for money may seem attractive but remember, if you marry for money you spend the rest of your life paying for it.

He could be very gay but looking for a cover story OP. What would you do then?

This.

Clearly you aren't interested. Clearly you see this as a hugely convenient relationship.

I usually suggest you go for a coffee as personality can win you over but, and im going to be blunt.. you've been so horrible about him and youre only asking this because hes rich - my advice would be to HIM and it would be to run fast

Why don't you meet him and see how the date goes. Nothing to lose and possibly everything to gain! Some people are not photogenic and look better in reality. But please don't go on the fact he is a millionaire just a date and see what happens!

Gosh, I hope for his, sake you don't meet him. You sound awful.

Might as well meet him for a coffee. Could make a friend if nothing else.

I've been deeply in love with at least a couple of people who you could say had fallen out of the Ugly Tree and hit every branch on the way down. Their personalities made them SO attractive that I fancied them madly. They were very confident, funny, and had jobs that were really admirable, like being a homicide detective. They weren't handsome, but boy, were they masculine. YUM YUM!

But OF COURSE you should not actually date and marry him unless you have genuine feelings for him! I think you should meet him though. I'd never have met those exes if I'd just gone by photos or videos.

She's probably trying on dresses and choosing napkins.

Is this a prospective arranged marriage?

Sounds like one.

I wish I'd married for money, no lie.

You can get with someone fun and gorgeous, but within a few years, they're just grumbling to you about how many courgettes you have or haven't bought, and have totally let themselves go. Especially if you are both poor, and don't have the time or resources to nurture your relationship or work out / get your teeth fixed or whatever. Especially if you're planning kids. At least with cash behind you, you're not missing your kids grow up because you're working some random job you don't care about, and have less stress on your relationship overall. Again, if you ARE planning kids, once they come along you might well be more interested in being with them, than whatever your partner or husband, is or isn't doing. So how sexy you find them, matters less. Or you might not. But I don't think it's uncommon for people (especially women?) to feel this way.

PLUS I think a lot of what makes someone attractive, is their smell, weirdly. Obviously you can't smell someone through a photo, so personally I'd meet in person to smell him (weird as that is) and see how we got on as people, before writing him off.

I wouldn't, but I also know that first impressions aren't everything. Would it hurt to go for one coffee, and how difficult would it be to pull back if you felt the same?

Don’t be so absolutely ridiculous

Would this be an arranged marriage? Your family have arranged for you to marry this man? Because why else would you be talking about marriage as if it’s an actual option for you with this man whom you haven’t met… why do you think he wants to marry you when you haven’t even met?

It’s a bit up yourself really to think that if you decide to go out with him then it’s inevitable that he will marry you. How odd.

The only time money has ever entered my head would be if someone is potentially controlling/narcissistic.

I can’t believe you actually have to ask this question!

You’d seriously consider meeting someone purely because they’re rich even though you’re repulsed by them?!

Where’s your dignity!!

Tbh I can’t take a good photo if I tried. Why don’t you meet him for a coffee? You’ll know then if there would be a spark

I’d love to have your confidence. You talk like you are the season’s diamond and the belle of the ball and a marriage offer would be a definite. I’m the same age as you so can say this, you are knocking on!

😂😂😂😂

I’d leave him well alone - not sure he deserves someone like you. You’re also presuming he wants to go out (let alone marry) you. Hopefully he’s had a lucky escape.