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Original poster

Question for the married women

187 replies

georgiegold · 22/10/2025 02:20

If you had to redo your life, would you get married again?
I’m interested in the answers from women who are currently married and living with their spouse.

OP posts:
CryMyEyesViolet · 22/10/2025 22:47

Together 16 years, married 10, would do it over again no hesitation.

NattyKnitter116 · 22/10/2025 22:47

Been with him 25 years, cohabited 15, and married 4 years. Wouldn’t hesitate to marry him again. Wouldn’t consider marriage again though if I outsurvive him.

Youraveragelass · 22/10/2025 22:49

Together 16 years, married 3 years - first and only relationship/ marriage. I wouldn’t change a thing!

fourelementary · 22/10/2025 22:49

Married for 18 years and absolutely would marry him again. Not the first husband- we only lasted 8 years!

Enko · 22/10/2025 22:50

Together 32 years married almost 30.

Yes Id do over. But likely have the wedding in UK not DK my mother did take over

Waitingfordoggo · 22/10/2025 22:50

I’ve been with my DH for 27 years and married for 22. First marriage for both of us. I would do it again- he is the only person on the planet who would put up with me really gets me. I believe my life is much richer with him in it than it would be without. Also, we have two DCs together who are awesome and I couldn’t have had those DCs with anyone else.

BoredZelda · 22/10/2025 22:52

Together nearly 26 years, married for 19 years. If I had my time again I’d have married him sooner.

VeryQuaintIrene · 22/10/2025 22:55

Had a bad first marriage (lasted 8 years and there were red flags a-plenty as I see now). I've been with my current spouse for 18 years, and first met when I was 42, so we were both settled in our identities, careers etc. and knew what we wanted and didn't want in a relationship. It's been brilliant and I am absolutely delighted with her and will be with her until death do one of us part.

MsCactus · 22/10/2025 22:57

Yes yes yes! Would marry again.

Been with DH for 15 years, first marriage

HellsBells67 · 22/10/2025 22:57

Married 24 years, my first, his second. I would definitely marry him again. We've grown up over the years so that things that seemed big issues in the early years no longer do and he is such a great father and protector. I do wonder though, if my attitude as the wedding day approached didn't help - I was petrified of 'forever' and went into it telling myself 'there's always divorce, it's not a prison' 😅

MustTryHarderAndHarder · 22/10/2025 22:58

Together 20 years married for 12.

My first his second.

Got married for inheritance tax purposes and would do it again for the same reason.

elm26 · 22/10/2025 23:00

Married 11 years, met age 13 and 14 married at 21 and 22. I would marry him again in a heartbeat and I love the bones of him. He’s a great man. He’s considerate, kind, adores me and our children, he works hard running his own business and he never ever lacks when it comes to helping at home/taking over with the kids. He can build anything from scratch and he’s an amazing cook which are bonuses. I trust him wholeheartedly and as a child I dreamt of a future that was safe and happy and warm and I’m so lucky I have that.

yeesh · 22/10/2025 23:02

Together 22 years, married 11. I would 100% do it again.

LouLou789 · 22/10/2025 23:03

Been married twice, wouldn’t choose number 1 again. I was worried I’d never find anyone and that was a big part of my motivation. However, our two lovely sons have never been regretted for a second. I’ve been with number 2 for 21 years and he’s the love of my life. I suppose if I’d married someone more suitable the first time round then I wouldn’t have been free to meet number 2. Strange how life turns out (I’m 65)

Deliveroo · 22/10/2025 23:08

19 years, 1st marriage. I’d do it all again, in a heart beat. I wish I could. Or better yet, I’d go back in time so we could meet even earlier. I wouldn’t change him for the world.

But if anything happened to him, I wouldn’t have any interest in remarrying.

mamagogo1 · 22/10/2025 23:09

Yes, I remarried recently

Dutchhouse14 · 22/10/2025 23:15

Yes, been married 28 year's.
Had a lot of trials and tribulations, stress, money worries, DC with serious illness which has put our relationship under pressure as well as the good times.
we have had 4 beautiful children together and a lifetime of shared memories. I have no regrets, when times were difficult we both could have walked away but we worked at it and things got better.

Deliveroo · 22/10/2025 23:16

It’s really interesting how many (myself included) happily married women have stated that they won’t remarry. I wonder why that is?

Frequentlyincorrectbut · 22/10/2025 23:17

Why does everyone keep saying they'd do it all again instantly but wouldn't remarry if they died? I get you might not want to marry for administrative reasons, but perhaps partner up? I'm a widow and I think unless you have trodden that path, you cannot know how you would feel in that situation. In my experience, divorcees are less likely to remarry than widows, and the not having someone to cuddle and to come home to does eat away at you even if you love many aspects of single life. What is good about being a widow these days is that you are not obliged for financial or social reasons to remarry, but if you are widowed with a good couple of decades of life to go, that life does feel rather long and loney without someone to spend it with, and that is made worse in some ways by having a happy original marriage.

Frequentlyincorrectbut · 22/10/2025 23:23

Deliveroo · 22/10/2025 23:16

It’s really interesting how many (myself included) happily married women have stated that they won’t remarry. I wonder why that is?

Lots of women, not just happily married women, are choosing to remain single these days, perhaps they don't find the quality of men available to their liking as many men haven't kept pace with changing norms and what's expected of equal partners. I also think it's the equivalent of wanting a cottage by the sea and writing books, it's kind of fantasy life where you get to live on your own without anyone else making a mess or demanding anything of you. In reality, not being touched by anyone for years on end can be very lonely, as can having no-one to talk to or to share happy or sad events with, some people do love the single life when they get to it, others find it's preferable to team up with someone else again. My mum declared she was happy single, til she met someone and then she wasn't!

TableLegs001 · 22/10/2025 23:24

Together 20 years and married most of it. Yes. Neither of us are perfect and we both know this and both work to make it better. My parents are married 50 years.

AppropriateAdult · 22/10/2025 23:25

Together 19 years. Married 13. No regrets.

Tryingatleast · 22/10/2025 23:27

Married twenty years and we’ve had some low lows but yes, definitely, I don’t think anyone could say their life would be better or worse having gone off on a different path, you had what you needed when you needed it but if it didn’t work that’s ok, it’s just a different way

HellsBells67 · 22/10/2025 23:32

Deliveroo · 22/10/2025 23:16

It’s really interesting how many (myself included) happily married women have stated that they won’t remarry. I wonder why that is?

If my dh died, I wouldn't want to do marry anyone else as I married dh to have my family with. At old age, there is no need.

JLou08 · 22/10/2025 23:33

I've never said this out loud, but no, he became to unwell for work shortly after the marriage. We're good now but there have been times it's been tough and when thinking about separation I've realised that he could be entitled to half my savings and pensions if we divorce. If he'd been a stay at home parent doing the childcare and housework I'd think that fair, but he hasn't. I've done the majority of that, provided care for him and progressed in my career. I have no issue in sharing the finances now but I would be very resentful if we had to share after separation , especially if it was due to another woman! Marriage is not always the safest option for women.