Boyfriend has split up with me because

[Thatisthatthen]

I am going on an all girls family holiday this weekend for a long weekend abroad. It’s been planned for months and we have been together for a year.

he has always had trust issues and he has always been insecure. He said this weekend is going to be the end of him and he has been very physically unwell this week in what he thinks is anxiety and stress induced.

He called me this afternoon and said, I’d rather be single with my head held high and walk away letting you carry on with what you are inevitably going to be doing this weekend, or I could stay with you never knowing the truth knowing you have lied to me.

i have never been unfaithful to him. He has made mountains out of molehills before over nothing and seems to use these as reasons not to trust but I just need a hand hold. Have been totally blind sided - I even booked us a weekend trip away in the coming weeks last night.

I bet he love bombed you too at the beginning and made himself out to be the ideal boyfriend. Did he?

I was going to say something like this. Yes, he will try to get back with you on the condition that you never arrange to go away with friends again.

Please don’t reply to him. Block him. Go away with your friends and have fun.

Good on you! Don’t let the bugger grind you down with his faux love for you, he’s trying to control you and you are right, good women friends are worth far more than male “loves”.
Have a great week-end!

is his name Mark?

As the saying goes, when someone shows you what they are like it’s wise to believe them. Congratulations on getting your future back. Commiserations to his next victim.

I really hope you block him and enjoy your holiday - and the rest of your life. He sounds like a coercive bore, and you're so well rid of him. Relationships are supposed to make you feel happy and safe, not scolded, criticised and controlled.

Go have sex if you want, you are now single. Enjoy your holiday! Tell your friends all about it, it’ll make it harder for you to row back when you get home. Knew he’s pull the “I just love you so much” card.

It’s bullshit manipulation. He’s created a story where you are the bad guy for not obeying him and it’s because you are a giant slag. Really think about that. Really think about the fact that the only way to prove you aren’t a “loose” woman is to do exactly what he wants. God I hate him from here.

Just ditch him and move on. You're going to have a lifetime of stress if you stay with someone who clearly doesn't trust you and wants to control you!

That really is the best attitude to have! Good on you and have a fab time, send us all a postcard!

This. 100%

I knew he’d be back after his long message listing all the ways you’d disrespected him. He will probably turn nasty, beg, threaten to end his life, turn even more nasty…. These insecure controlling twats always do. He’ll try and gaslight you into thinking you’ve caused him to feel the way he does. I would block him now. He’s already been back hoping he can still hook you back. Don’t even give it the time of day. Block and move on.

What a lovely guilt free holiday you can enjoy now. No one to explain yourself to, defend yourself, beg forgiveness from, try to appease…. Relief!

Controlling wanker overplayed his hand, he thought he'd snap his fingers and you'd cancel the trip. Good for you, OP, stay strong and never look back. Block the whining twit before you go, otherwise you'll be subjected to his idiocy when you should be having a good time!

Run, toward your holiday, friends, family, fun - and away from this controlling, insecure, gaslighting prick.

His behaviour is only going one way - worse. Tell him 'bye, have a nice life' and then block him on absolutely everything. It is tempting to defend yourself, to point out that this is a him problem not a you problem - it is a waste of your time and energy, he isn't interested in the truth.

Dear God how dramatic is he.
As n’sync says Bye Bye Bye.
Seriously op you can’t live your life like this and it will get worse not better.

Tell him to fuck off and wish him luck finding another mug (no insult intended) to gaslight

Enjoy your holiday

let him go. He’s not worth the stress

I’m so glad you can see what he’s trying to do and not played into his hands. He obviously thought you’d cancel the trip and not go so he wouldn’t break up with you. Have a great holiday!!

Lucky lucky escape

Be advised: More bullshit to follow.

Be on your guard for the avalanche of shite he is going to make up to get you back. Don’t believe anything. He might cry.

He sounds desperate.

Be really careful and back away.

I’m sorry he turned out to be a controlling dick, you are defo better off out of that potential shit show. Have a great weekend and move on. Block and delete, he may come grovelling back. Do not cave, he won’t change.

Sounds like you had a lucky escape! Enjoy the weekend with your friends and forget about the pratty ex- boyfriend .

Enjoy your girls trip OP and celebrate your freedom from this awful man!!! You dodged a massive bullet there!!!

Bloody hell I hope you didn’t ever have your children around him op

Don’t waste any more time or headspace on this person. Block him and make sure you have good personal security for when you return, don’t open the door to him and be alert to him turning up to where he knows you’ll be, you might need to be very firm with him. He has shown you who he really is, believe him.

Enjoy your holiday !!! Don’t let anyone control you .

Think yourself lucky. Walk away.