Boyfriend has split up with me because

[Thatisthatthen]

I am going on an all girls family holiday this weekend for a long weekend abroad. It’s been planned for months and we have been together for a year.

he has always had trust issues and he has always been insecure. He said this weekend is going to be the end of him and he has been very physically unwell this week in what he thinks is anxiety and stress induced.

He called me this afternoon and said, I’d rather be single with my head held high and walk away letting you carry on with what you are inevitably going to be doing this weekend, or I could stay with you never knowing the truth knowing you have lied to me.

i have never been unfaithful to him. He has made mountains out of molehills before over nothing and seems to use these as reasons not to trust but I just need a hand hold. Have been totally blind sided - I even booked us a weekend trip away in the coming weeks last night.

🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
This is the beginning of a slippery slope!
Block him and enjoy your weekend.

Omg.
Run for the hills.
Enjoy your weekend

Oh OP, I had one of these, it was awful. My anxiety was through the roof permanently.

Block him, enjoy your holiday and don’t look back. Be warned he will almost definitely come crawling back but please be strong! You will feel like the weight of the world has been lifted from your shoulders once he finally gets the message, I promise x

He sounds like a nutter. The trash has taken itself out - although I’m sure the trash will try to bring itself back in soon, so be prepared for that. Just stay strong and agree he was right it wasn’t working out. you’re 100% better off.

Go and enjoy your weekend and thank your lucky stars it finished while he was just a bf and had not attached himself inextricably.

Block, delete and move on! You have had a lucky escape! 🚩

Massive red flag. He’s done you a favour. Good men (or even half decent ones) do NOT behave like this. It’s abusive. You deserve better and you will find someone better.

Run and don't ever look back, you've had a lucky escape from this controlling arse. Go and enjoy your weekend away and never give this man a second thought. Block, delete, cut all contact, don't give him the opportunity to contact you again.

This. Imagine your life married to this control freak, slowly diminishing your world, getting jealous when you visit family or friends. It is a huge red flag and you should thank your lucky stars he is showing himself now. Run like the wind. Enjoy your fab weekend.

I went out with someone similar, just for a few months in my early 30's. I dumped him once we got to the stage when he pinned me by the wall by my neck. All the games he played up to that point were what you're hearing now.

Just be prepared for the declarations of love, then the nasty when you ignore him, for possibly a few months, don't be tempted to go back there for your own sake. I actually got rather good at typing 'f**k off' to each and every single text message he sent me without even looking at my mobile and I did find a way to block his emails. Days before smart phones, lol. I did however change my locks in case he'd had a key cut.

You need to block him now and unblock him later if you want. Before the medical emergency or threats of suicide start.

Trash took itself out

If he has trust issues without cause theyre his issue and tbh im not convinced he isnt just saying these things to control you and encourage you to behave how hed prefer

This is a 'him' problem and you are not going to change anything. I don't think you need to tie yourself to this person

Have a great time and don't look back.

What a complete twat he really is. Good riddence to that moron.
You party on girl !🤘

It sounds like he has some deep-seated trust issues, but at the end of the day, he can't be ruining your life because of it

I think trust issues are just another weapon of control with these twats.

It's a favoured tactic as trust is subjective and unquantifiable. Regaining trust would be a lifetime's endeavour. Jumping through hoops but never quite enough hoops to reach the goal. Any tiny (or non existing) excuse will 'reset' the trust clock.

Example

'D'P - Where did you go this afternoon?
OP - Morrisons
'D'P - Did you post that letter for me.
OP - Yes
'D'P - So when I asked where you went you only said Morrisons. Now I find out you also posted that letter. There isn't a letterbox near Morrisons. What else are you not telling me? I fucking knew I couldn't trust you. It's lie after lie with you isn't it?

Rinse and repeat to infinity.

His behaviour is bordering on abusive control.
Block him and don't look back. He won't change.

Congratulations 🥂 Well rid

Oh, FFS. I'd have ZERO patience for such an unhealthy relationship. It's deeply fucked-up, and so is he. I'd rather be single for a million years than put up with this kind of utter, utter crap.

You know what to do.

Edit: I saw that you did it! WELL DONE! Nasty, abusive little twerp deserves you to tell him how you met a tall dark stranger on your weekend away who practically railed you through the headboard, LOL! How dare he try to control and upset you like this. 🤬

Jesus this man is a classic abuser OP. Please do not allow yourself to be hoovered back in. It WILL only get much worse...Don't end up bitterly regretting not getting away from him NOW. 💐

He won't do anything, they threaten it but again it's a control thing.
My ex did this and I shrugged "Okay, that's up to you, bye."
Oddly enough his shattered life, nothing worth living for was resolved within 2 weeks. He was mugging off some other poor cow before dumping her high and dry and in debt. I know because she called me to tell me oh so smugly, she'd make him happy. I tried to tell her, she called me jealous. The four months later I got the sob stories from her he'd stolen moey and goods from her and run off with her words "Some old slag from the pub." What did she really expect?

"He said, he would be happier never speaking to me again as he will never then know what I have been up to, yet he loves me so much, too much which is why his life is in a mess."

If he'd be "happier never speaking to you again" that's ok - he doesn't have to, and you're doing him a favour by saying it's over.
And he'll have to sort his own life out because that's not up to you.
Don't let him come whining back (wouldn't be surprising if he tried).

Enjoy your holiday and don’t get back with this controlling bully.

Please block him now. Otherwise you just know he's going to be in touch with you all of your holiday putting a downer on it.

Off you fuck then Romeo.

what better way to get over a man than to surround yourself with marvellous women.

have a fantastic time op.

Keep this thread handy if you have a wobble. You are well rid of him.