Partner does not know I know he didn't stay home last night

[Goldleafsand]

My partner went out with friends for food and drinks last night
He msg me at 11pm saying he would be getting a taxi home soon , just having one last beer which is all fine by me of course.
We both msg goodnight and I love you to each other as I had an early start this morning
All was really good between us
I said I'd hoped he had a lovely evening with friends and he said he was looking forward to seeing me on Wednesday.

This morning my work colleague rang me and said her car wouldn't start and would I mind picking her up on the way to work , I agreed , it's absolutely no problem for me & didnt put me out of my way at all

She lives on the same cul de sac as my partner and you have to drive past his to get to hers.
As I glanced at his house I noticed every curtain was open including the bedroom ones. He also hadn't put his bin out , it's bin day
I know his house if that makes sense and it was clear he had not been home.
This was 7. 30 am , he is on annual leave , he was planning a lay in this morning , he was out with mates drinking I know him well he would no way be up that early
Anyway this surprised me a bit as he hadn't said he was staying out , however i understand things can cahnge on a night out drinking and all that and maybe he stayed at a friend's house ? Stayed for a few more drinks , who knows 🤷‍♀️

He is free to do how he pleases
However I have not heard from his at all today.
No goodmorning txts which is unlike him, even if he had been out drinking the night before he would always msg in the morning.

I am not going to say I know he didn't stay at home , I am going to sit back and watch and see if he is honest about this as there would be no reason to lie to me
I am very laid back and we both have a good group of friends and social lives so I am in no way controlling or jealous type
But there's this awful gut feeling niggling away at me and it's like my instincts are telling me something just isn't right here
I am also worrying that he is actually ok
But I don't want to bombard him with msgs either
So I'm giving it some time to see how this pans out throughout the day.
Why do I have this awful gut feeling? Is it anxiety or intuition?

I would be having your exact reaction to the circumstances.
I hope everything was okay in the end. Any updates?

Hope all is ok OP!

I feel really sorry for you op. I don’t think you are being unreasonable and I’d be feeling worried too. Hope you have heard from him now x

Given OP was quite upset by some of the unpleasant posts directed at her, at a time when she was already worried and upset about her partner, I wouldn't blame her at all for not coming back to the thread.
I hope she is ok and I hope that whatever the explanation for her partner going awol turned out to be it hasn't caused OP more distress.

Hope you are both ok.

What was the outcome, OP?? Was he ok??

@Goldleafsand Sorry, but what do you think happened? He was out drinking, so the only thing that could happen afterwards is that he would head home and go to bed.

You aren't thinking he met a woman during the night out are you? Because that's largely confined to TV and the days of men going to pubs or clubs to meet women are over.

Hope he made contact and all is now well x

@Goldleafsand Any update???

People are honestly so rude on this site. You have every reason to be concerned or even suspicious. Why wouldn’t you!? Did you hear back?

It is possible to crawl into the house drunk and into bed without closing the curtains - well because you’re drunk. Also forgetting the bins in the morning because you are comatose or feeling ill. It can happen.

I’d be worried too! People on mumsnet are weird. Don’t listen to the ones saying stalker or unhinged. Let us know how you get on!

Where do you think men are meeting women these days? Dating apps?

Hi everyone
Apologies for only now replying , I only heard from him at 8pm this evening 🫣
So the good news is he is alive
I can't quite believe what I'm about to write because it feels and sounds surreal, probably because it is so here goes...
I get a video call from him an hour ago , he is in France with his best friend
They ended up getting more and more drunk and decided in a very drunken state to get a train then the ferry to calais 😮
Carried on drinking , got into thier accommodation in calais and slept for a few hours , when he woke up his phone had died
He then went into town with his friend to buy a charger to let me and his parents know that he was alive, well and just in France on a random , spontaneous trip & bender in France with his best mate
They carried on drinking through the whole of today
He thought it would sound far fetched and that's why he did the video call to show where he was. His best friend was next to him in the video totally plastered
This evening he has msg and said He is feeling really rough and regrets going
They are coming home tomorrow
I asked him how did you get your passport? and he said they got a taxi back to his last night got some stuff and passport and then onto his mates then got the train!
I feel like this is something from the hangover. It is a bit nuts but I am so pleased he is safe!
This has been one hell of a worrying day I'm going to get some sleep now
Thank you for all of your supportive messages

I hope you've managed to get hold of him OP and everything is ok.

Wow! Well, nobody guessed THAT 😂

Glad he's okay(ish) and hope he remembered to get you a souvenir 😆
Thank you very much for the update!

Oh thank goodness op! As the hours crept on, I honestly thought he was badly injured (or dead!)

So you are far calmer than I'd have been in your shoes!

Well yes, most people meet their partner online nowadays.

Do you really think women go to pubs and clubs to meet men? May have been true in the past, but nowadays, I'm pretty sure that women's lives don't revolve around men.

He might feel like rubbish and hungover now but I did the same once about 20 years ago! Was in a club and we decided to go to Paris! Mad drunken dash for passports but look back and what a great night!

I’m sure this happened in a 70s sitcom! Maybe that’s where they got the idea! Glad he’s safe and I wouldn’t be sympathetic about his hangover.

Glad you got an answer, sounds like it was more exciting than you anticipated!

Have you even read OP’s updates? 🤔

That’s funny. I am glad he contacted you!

🤣🤣🤣 brilliant. He's going to need some kip when he gets back lol. Glad he's safe and well.

Hello OP, definitely sounds like something off the hangover, hope you’re ok and I’m so glad you’ve heard from him!
You will hopefully sleep well tonight after a full day of worry bless you, you’ve a very cool head on your shoulders for sure, I would have been climbing the walls 🥴
So glad it’s a really positive ending, and I hope you have a lovely evening tomorrow when he’s back, I’m just assuming here you’ll see him after you’ve finished work! 💛