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Original poster

Husband is MASSIVELY pee’d off with me

276 replies

Blackjack2002 · 31/05/2025 20:29

I had lip filler done today but didn’t tell my husband as I know he hates it.
I pranked him a few years back by sticking my top lip up with face glue as an April Fool, and he went mad. At the time, I said I’d never have it done. I’ve never been confident about the way I look, I’ve just turned 48 and thought why not?

I’ve only had a small amount and they are quite swollen, they will settle down in a few days. But he says he can’t look at me and that I look like a clown. He’s been angry and shouty but now getting the silent treatment. We rarely have a cross word so today has been no fun.

Not sure what to do. Any advice please?

OP posts:
cinnamongirl123 · 31/05/2025 21:45

“thought why not?”
Because they look ridiculous, for one thing.

Itsrainingthankgoodness · 31/05/2025 21:46

HobbyHorse30 · 31/05/2025 21:34

Wish I was surprised at the amount of replies defending your DH and slagging fillers (and no, I don’t have any). The fillers are beside the point; it’s your face and your DH has no right to dictate to you what you do with it. I hope you love them and they give you the confidence you were hoping they would.

I dont think the fillers are " beside the point".

I understand that it's OP's body and her choice. But she has done something drastic by having lip fillers and it will change her DH's physical attraction to her and lower his estimation of her as a person. So I think it's understandable for him to be upset.

isawrainbowbridge · 31/05/2025 21:46

Lip fillers looks absolutely awful. We’re going to have a generation of women who have defaced themselves. I’m not surprised he’s annoyed.

BruFord · 31/05/2025 21:48

CopperWhite · 31/05/2025 21:17

If my DP came home having drastically altered the way their face looks, I’d be upset too. Especially if he knew I’d hate it. It’s like saying you don’t give a shit about whether or not he finds you attractive.

@CopperWhite Sometimes a person can feel self-conscious about something even when their partner isn't bothered/doesn't even notice. My DH thinks that his face is too round and that his beard elongates the shape - so he prefers the way he looks with it even though I think he looks fine without it. So, I can see that if the OP dislikes her lips, she may feel more confident with filler.

Glowingup · 31/05/2025 21:48

I can’t believe the comments on here. What the fuck is wrong with people? What else does the OP need her husbands permission for? Getting her hair cut/dyed? Losing/gaining weight? Should she run her outfit choices by him too so that the poor lamb isn’t upset if he doesn’t like something she’s wearing?
Not sure how clear I can make it but it has precisely fuck all to do with him. If my DP wanted to get Botox or filler or do his hair differently or start bulking I wouldn’t care. I love him for who he is, not his appearance. And no I wouldn’t expect him to run it by me or discuss it in advance. It’s entirely his choice.
you should be ashamed of yourselves.

OonaStubbs · 31/05/2025 21:48

OP what your reaction be if your DC came home one day with botox lips?

NewGoldFox · 31/05/2025 21:49

It’s your face at the end of the day.
Expect he will come around to them once the swelling goes down.
Enjoy your new pout.

Glowingup · 31/05/2025 21:50

OlderGlaswegianLivingInDevon · 31/05/2025 21:11

' I’ve never been confident about the way I look,'

your husband is obiv happy with the way you look

you dated, you got married.

did that not inspire you with confidence

Oh yeah sorry I forgot that if one man dates you and marries you that magically fills you with enough confidence to never want to improve your appearance ever 🙄

marmaladeandpeanutbutter · 31/05/2025 21:50

It’s your body so your choice. I personally wouldn’t but everyone is different and plenty would. He is very rude.

justanothermanicmondayyyy · 31/05/2025 21:51

to all the seething bitchy miserable women on this thread, your husbands that you haven't shagged in probably 8 years are probably looking at women with fake lips and tits on pornhub. Rather you than me!

YANBU OP at all. Don't let these oil paintings bring you down.

Glowingup · 31/05/2025 21:51

OonaStubbs · 31/05/2025 21:48

OP what your reaction be if your DC came home one day with botox lips?

Who the fuck gets Botox in their lips? At least get your treatments right. If it’s a minor child, that’s not legal and I’d be annoyed. If they’re an adult I’d respect their choice. But do note that the OP’s DH is not her dad. In case you thought he was.

gamerchick · 31/05/2025 21:52

We don't know they're women. There are a lot of men on here we don't know about.

Canarybutterdaisy · 31/05/2025 21:53

How much did you have injected? Where I've known someone had their lips done, something like 0.5ml isn't noticeable once the swelling goes down, whereas 1.5ml is usually pretty obvious. Most people who say they've never seen natural filler are just unaware and thinking of the overdone/bubble pout looks.

Its your body, but if you know he feels a certain way you can't have expected to surprise him and have it go down well.

SpringTime2023 · 31/05/2025 21:54

My guess is that you hoped that he wouldn't notice, but that they would give you a confidence boost.

Lip filler always looks a bit eek initially (which is why his reaction was as it was), but then settles down massively.

SO many people get it done, it's only really the OTT examples that people judge negatively (just like filler, Botox). I'm sure your lips will look great and natural in a few days/a week, however it's obviously hard to hide it to your partner until then!

MN is full of very judgy people tonight it seems!!!

Glowingup · 31/05/2025 21:54

gamerchick · 31/05/2025 21:52

We don't know they're women. There are a lot of men on here we don't know about.

The only men who have a problem with this to the extent that OP’s DH does are the super controlling ones who don’t want their partner getting too attractive in case she leaves. Also the types to sabotage weight loss efforts.

HobbyHorse30 · 31/05/2025 21:55

Itsrainingthankgoodness · 31/05/2025 21:46

I dont think the fillers are " beside the point".

I understand that it's OP's body and her choice. But she has done something drastic by having lip fillers and it will change her DH's physical attraction to her and lower his estimation of her as a person. So I think it's understandable for him to be upset.

Show quote history

“Lower his estimation of her as a person”

That’s hilarious. She’s had her lips made bigger, not pissed on the kitchen floor 🙄

CinnamonJellyBeans · 31/05/2025 21:56

I'd go back and get more added just to show him that he has no control and no say whatsoever.

Jibberjabba · 31/05/2025 21:57

It’s no surprise he reacted like this, I personally hate the look of fillers and if hypothetically my DH decided to have them I would struggle. Stating the obvious but we do kiss with our lips so imo its a big thing to have done if your other half isn’t keen

Canarybutterdaisy · 31/05/2025 21:57

OonaStubbs · 31/05/2025 21:48

OP what your reaction be if your DC came home one day with botox lips?

Botox lips? What?

LivelyMintViper · 31/05/2025 21:58

Just out of interest , is there anything he could do regarding his appearance that would make you embarrassed , annoyed or uncomfortable?

Itsrainingthankgoodness · 31/05/2025 22:01

HobbyHorse30 · 31/05/2025 21:55

“Lower his estimation of her as a person”

That’s hilarious. She’s had her lips made bigger, not pissed on the kitchen floor 🙄

Show quote history

Well I'm afraid having lip filler done makes a statement about a person.

AzureShark · 31/05/2025 22:02

The only men who have a problem with this to the extent that OP’s DH does are the super controlling ones who don’t want their partner getting too attractive in case she leaves

But that's really not true, is it?

Do you seriously believe that every man thinks pumped up, fake lips are the epitome of attractiveness?

I think plenty of men would be absolutely gutted if their oh did this without warning.

saltandvinegarchipsticks · 31/05/2025 22:02

Glowingup · 31/05/2025 21:54

The only men who have a problem with this to the extent that OP’s DH does are the super controlling ones who don’t want their partner getting too attractive in case she leaves. Also the types to sabotage weight loss efforts.

Show quote history

If it’s obvious filler I wouldn’t feel my partner was making themselves more attractive…

I agree OP can do what they like to their body but the consequences might be that their partner finds them less attractive or unattractive, and that’s the rub. But she’s made her choice. Her partner shouldn’t keep banging on about it and sulking, but if he wanted to back off from the relationship that would be understandable.

Booboobagins · 31/05/2025 22:03

@Blackjack2002 its your body you can do what you want. Your DH is ooo.How childish and controlling of him.

So what can you do? Reduce the swelling. Google what to do. I think you'll find they look great once settled, just make sure most of the filler is gone before you get a top up otherwise you'll get a trout pout ;)

Ive seen some stupid replies to this! Women should shut the f-up if all they are doing is tearing down another woman! Noone is interested in your opinion.

Good luck with DH.

Carodebalo · 31/05/2025 22:04

It’s your body, but he has to look at it, and he has to kiss those lips. If my husband had done this I would be really upset too, especially if he knew I’d hate it. I would let things calm down, and let the swelling go down, and then calmly discuss it. Please try to think how you would feel if he did something to his body that you’d hate the look of, and see if that helps with the discussion?