New Partner Wet the Bed

[NewManIssue]

That’s it, basically.

I met someone about a month ago and it has been fantastic really good fun no issues at all, we’ve done absolutely loads together, met friends of each other and an adult child, and have lots of planned.

He came over yesterday afternoon because we were both off work and we went out for a walk had a few drinks. He made us some food. We had a few more drinks and we were both pretty drunk, I will admit.

The morning when I went over to give him a hug as the alarm was about to go off the bed was soaking, I presumed with sweat…no particular smell at this stage.

I left my bed open to air with a view to stripping the sheets after work, however when I went back in there the whole room reeked of urine and there was a huge stain and it has gone through my mattress topper and my mattress is still soaking wet as are the pillows.

I’ve never experienced this before, Although I know it can be something some men do when they are drunk…

I feel like it’s something I need to speak to him face-to-face about which I could probably do tomorrow when he finishes work at about 9:30pm but otherwise I’m unlikely to see him for a few days.

I feel a little awkward. I don’t want him embarrass him however surely it’s not the first time even if this is the first time with me since I’ve known him.

It’s not a dealbreaker initially, however if it’s a regular thing, it’s definitely a dealbreaker. I think I’m just gonna have to say, I had to sleep on the sofa tonight…the bed was still wet and it wasn’t sweat - which we initially assumed…

If anyone can give me any advice or have experienced this, please shout!

Bloody typical it has been going amazingly well, For the first time in my life, I’m with a man who is more keen on me than I am him (guards up still 🤣)

I agree completely.

For some reason people on here really seem to be enjoying sneering at loss of control of a person's bladder.

Nobody chooses to wet the bed. There's an issue behind it. Even alcohol addiction is a medical problem (although it doesn't sound like he has an alcohol addiction) .

Doesnt mean it's 'ok'. But sneering and laughing and poking fun and calling him all manner of names all through losing bladder control is rather malicious.

I don't get the being gobsmacked at his embarrassment and trying to cover it up either. I think that's a very normal human response to extreme embarrassment. I can understand it I'm afraid.

How he will react when confronted is the clincher. If he admits it and apologises and offers to rectify the damage then it shows responsibility. But I do get why he didn't immediately spring up and say "whoops, wet myself! I'll just strip off all the sheets " . He was probably beyond utterly mortified and vehemently in deep shame, of course he's naturally going to try to go into "denial". It's not 'ok' , but it is understandable.

Oh heck,
Been waiting , trying to stay awake to hear about the pissing chef

Hope he gets cooking quick so he can go home asap

Never refreshed a page so much 😂👀

I'll be honest - I don't think OPs posts and updates are painting her in the best light either.

It's becoming a bit of 'mean girls' entertainment.

I think perhaps it would be best if he reimburses you what you're owed for your damages and both go your seperate ways for both your sakes.

@NewManIssue completely get where you are at but have had a friend do this at this age for the first time - and he was mortified. It hasn’t happened since but occurred when he relaxed after a few stressful months. Just keep an open mind until you get the facts.

Might be place marking 😬
Could it be prostate related? Sorry if this has already been raised…so to speak

Years ago when I was 18 I had a boyfriend who I slept with once .This happened he wet the bed , he also used to become anxious if we went in a pub and I would have to order the drinks while he disappeared turned out he d been badly beaten all through his childhood by his father . It s not always what it seems

Could he have a water infection maybe !!!!! 🤔

Is this how desperate some women are? A bloke you’ve known only a month pisses in your bed yet is worthy of a second chance? That is terrible! First of all,he knew he’d done it. No way he couldn’t have known. Secondly,if he does have some “condition” where it’s a symptom,you would give someone a heads up that it could happen. You certainly wouldn’t ruin someone’s mattress and not say a word! Text him a link to a new mattress and then forget him

I really feel like everyone is laying into the poster......... thats unfair.

She is shocked as she has not experienced this before & she is working it out in her head because it is a rather vile thing for someone to do & she is thinking on how best to handle it.

I've been in that situation with someone, and it is awful working out how to handle it. I at first was completely shocked and felt sorry for them.....BUT I soon realised it was a regular occurance .......& that they had to go..... it is horrible & wastes too much time and is costly.

I think he will have done this before and in my experience it has become so normal that , they actually get up and leave the mess. I am so sorry but it does happen.....the person that did it in my home did the same & just left the mess....his mother had normalised it for him. Unfortunately his mom had excepted his bed wetting and had always cleaned it up, I was initially kind and thought he had a problem - but in all honesty, I respect that from your posts - you will not let this pass & you should either break it off or only stop at his home - that way you will not have to do all the cleaning up .

In all honesty , after experiencing this , I know it will only get worse...

I once slept with a guy who was epileptic, he got over excited and had a fit in my bed. Once he'd gone home I realised he'd wee'd the bed and not said anything - weeing wasn't the issue as he couldn't help it but pulling the duvet over the wet patch and not saying a word was a major deal breaker!

I’m glad to read more recent commenters seem to be a bit more understanding. Sometimes MN can be way too harsh imo. I think it comes from a place of wishing to support OPs almost unconditionally, but it’s not always helpful to immediately hate on the other (unrepresented) party!

At the end of the day, my life would be very different today (I would not have my DH or my gorgeous DD & DS!) if I had chosen not to forgive DH (then bf!) after he shat on me back in ‘07.

@bettermumthanyou you’ve got a weird idea of foreplay

Where's the lie? It said she assumed it was sweat

Has @NewManIssue , solved the Jimmy Riddle?

No shit, Sherlock!

Oh come off it!!!! Don’t be ridiculous. If someone knows they have a weak bladder and that this happens when they drink too much and they still do it regardless, it’s their own fault 💯

Hope the conversation goes OK!

There is no evidence that a) he has done it before b) he was drunk c) he was 'expecting' it to happen.

She’s already said her daughter is in her 30’s. They don’t have little kids.

He will face had cocaine. Guaranteed.

Don't go round spreading malicious misinformation. That's uncalled for.

Never mind the honeymoon, your dance can be to 'I feel it in my fingers, I feel it in my toes...'

Hope he replaces the mattress and the bedding