New Partner Wet the Bed

[NewManIssue]

That’s it, basically.

I met someone about a month ago and it has been fantastic really good fun no issues at all, we’ve done absolutely loads together, met friends of each other and an adult child, and have lots of planned.

He came over yesterday afternoon because we were both off work and we went out for a walk had a few drinks. He made us some food. We had a few more drinks and we were both pretty drunk, I will admit.

The morning when I went over to give him a hug as the alarm was about to go off the bed was soaking, I presumed with sweat…no particular smell at this stage.

I left my bed open to air with a view to stripping the sheets after work, however when I went back in there the whole room reeked of urine and there was a huge stain and it has gone through my mattress topper and my mattress is still soaking wet as are the pillows.

I’ve never experienced this before, Although I know it can be something some men do when they are drunk…

I feel like it’s something I need to speak to him face-to-face about which I could probably do tomorrow when he finishes work at about 9:30pm but otherwise I’m unlikely to see him for a few days.

I feel a little awkward. I don’t want him embarrass him however surely it’s not the first time even if this is the first time with me since I’ve known him.

It’s not a dealbreaker initially, however if it’s a regular thing, it’s definitely a dealbreaker. I think I’m just gonna have to say, I had to sleep on the sofa tonight…the bed was still wet and it wasn’t sweat - which we initially assumed…

If anyone can give me any advice or have experienced this, please shout!

Bloody typical it has been going amazingly well, For the first time in my life, I’m with a man who is more keen on me than I am him (guards up still 🤣)

Can't believe people are still defending him! It doesn't fucking matter if he's ill/an alcoholic/has a disease...he pissed the bed and KNOWINGLY LEFT IT FOR OP TO CLEAN UP, RUINING HER MATTRESS AND BEDDING.

That is completely indefensible...in my world anyway

Honestly I think you’re my favourite ever MN poster 😅. Not to detract from the fact that this is a real relationship and I honestly am rooting for it to be a one off resolvable issue - but that said you come across as so measured and calm but also hilarious and witty in how you’re replying to people/addressing the issue. Im so sad and have invested in this thread so hard that I’m counting the hours down to 2115 hours - don’t be late will you?! 😅😂

I would have some sympathy if he had actually been honest and tried to clean it up and offering to pay for a new mattress. As it stands though, nah!

Prostate. That’s how.

Can’t wait for the update! Might have to pause MAFS to read it! 🤣

@spacewitch99 Maybe he was so drunk and thought it was you who peed the bed! 🥴 He doesn’t want to embarrass you by saying anything 🥴

Yep, the guy opened a thread on dadsnet about his recent GF peeing on the bed, not addressing it and "should he dump her". Apparently he's going to have a chat with her tonight.

How do we know that’s it though?

@MoominMai🤣🤣 thanks fan girl I won’t let you down 🤟🏽

Not always. Can be a sign of lots of illnesses

I need to know how this goes.

Me too (bites nails) 😅

I’m going over soon. Bit nervous now ffs!

awaits update

You sound like a very reasonable person @NewManIssue . Hoping the conversation goes OK this evening and I'm looking forward to reading the update later 🙂.

'You know you thought you'd been sweating through the night on Monday? Well, it wasn't sweat, it was urine'

That seems like a reasonable way to start the conversation. Then just let him speak and see what he says. If he gets arsey or denies it, just walk away. Good luck!

I think this is a good way of wording it

OP, I met my partner when I was 25 and he was nearing 40. He was slightly overweight and has had prostate issues (thankfully nothing to worry about, but alcohol and caffeine are a HUGE issue).
He has always been good to clean himself pre sex, but I did have to suggest that he had to put pants (and we never discussed it but a pad) on afterwards as it’s something that isn’t ok to sleep without).
It’s embarrassing but he got it and never denied that he had a shit pelvic floor.
Together “we’ve” worked on it. He’s lost weight, has removed caffeine and really reduced alcohol. I wish he’d focus more on his pelvic floor in general as it’s so fuckibg important, and I can’t imagine any woman just shrugging their shoulders and carried on with it without trying to sort it.

The anticipation of his explanation....
As I'm baffled how it could even be a possibility that he wouldn't know. My son still randomly wets the bed about once a year, and he comes in to tell me as soon as it happens because it wakes him up and obviously doesn't want the feeling of lying in wetness, so I'll change the sheets/pjs (waterproof mattress protector) so he can go back to sleep.

Are you absolutely certain it wasn't the dog?
A few weeks ago my dog peed on my daughters bed the day after she went back to uni. Honestly she has never done it before and hasn't done it since.....

Good luck....

Same 😆

Waterproof mattress protectors…essentials. Not that everyone is expected to wet the bed, but sweat is not unusual at times even if it’s not enough to soak the bed .
If there is an accident or sweat, protector goes in the washing machine and you don’t need to pay for a mattress until you’re ready to change mattresses for age reasons .
Think of it as insurance

Awaiting update 👀👀👀

Wow - that is harsh!!! It’s not like he did it on purpose, show some compassion!!

It sounds like everything was otherwise going so well and the two of them were really connecting - it would be such a shame to throw that away so easily!!

My boyfriend was so drunk once that he shat on my leg while we were asleep in bed! To be fair, he didn’t try to deny it, and although it was gross at the time, we joke about it now.

Omg what's happening?

And that didn't give you the massive, massive ick?????

I don' know what's worse - that he shat on your leg or that he allowed himself to get so drunk.

Women are so forgiving of men compared to the opposite. Makes me mad!