No Children at weddings AGAIN!!!!

[cathers]

Can't believe it. Opened the post this morning to find wedding invite number 3 for this summer. Yet again 'UNFORTUNATELY NO CHILDREN ALLOWED!' stipulated.

That now means that for three weekends in may and June we will have to choose between the wedding of 3 close family / friends or finding a babysitter for 12 hours at a time!All weddings are over 150 miles away.

Is this the current vogue to have adult only weddings? Personally find that some weddings without kids can be stuffy and v formal. Much prefer old fashioned celebratory sort! Any one else finding this?
What are you doing?

I was stunned when we were invited to our best friend's wedding and they said 'no kids' Our dd is their god-daughter and she adores them. She is very bemused why she can't go. I said it was for grown ups only, and she said 'but I went to Sally's wedding' and I didn't really have a good reason why for her

Oh yes - and they are all worded

'Unfortunately we are not able to accomodate children'

What the f* does that mean - say too many people / dont like kids / too expensive ..
not asking DS to move in with them.

I said no children for the evening part of our wedding, but only because the evening entertainment was not child friendly and the only kids who we knew at the time were my cousins, and total PITA And I knew that my aunt would enjoy the evening out by herself.

I don't like going to weddings either so if anyone wants to bar my DS that is fine. £100 saved on outfit, £50 on present, £200 on hotel and travel.

Maybe they don't like kids.

So don't go.

A very salient point, lapin. We were dragged to countless weddings as kids and even if there was 'kid's entertainment' they were all boring as hell.

it gets old after about an hour.

didn't get good till we started pinching booze.

A dinner party is a few hours in the evening. A wedding might be an entire day and could involve staying away. Much more difficult to manage.

But as has been said, you don't have to go.

DH, DD1 (aged 2) and I were invited to a wedding in November.
Unfortunately DD2 (8 weeks at time) was not allowed to come "because if she was invited there would be too many children at the wedding"
My cousin was happy to invite our noisy toddler but not a young baby who would have slept to his wedding. Just wonder if they'll change their opinion now they've just had their 1st?
Needless to say we didn't go or buy a pressie either

I would hate to take my kids to a wedding, i never have, even if theyve been invited. There is no way they would sit through a 4 course meal and the bloody speeches without spilling something / crying / fighting. By the time the disco started they would be knackered and we'd have to leave early.

No, they would get on my nerves, much better without them imo.

Most of my friends have had child free weddings, and rather than being stuffy and formal I found the adults to be having a whale of a time without their kids!

Oh, just don't go. It's such a hassle to organise all day childcare, lose a weekend with the kids and spend half the time ringing to check they are okay.
We once had to fly somewhere for a wedding, pay for a relative to fly to us to babysit (no local family)for the weekend, and were told how nice it must be to be childfree. Not for 48 hours it wasn't and not at an additional £200.

Haylstones -
I'm going to a child free wedding in october but as I'm a bridesmaid and due to give birth in september they have obviously made an exception for me! Sending you home cos you can't bring your breastfeeding baby in!!! Horrible.

But it depends on the type of wedding doesn't it?
if you're going for the full on hour in the church followed by 3 hour of photos by which time everyone is gnawing of their own arm in starvation and then you still have to sit through dull speeches then heh I agree, what sane children would want to be there. But if it's a more light hearted affair than children can love going.
agree that sometimes it's great to go to a wedding without the kids, I think what upsets people is when NO KIDS is put forward to vehemently, and with it the suggestion that they'll spoil the 'perfect' day.

My DH's nephew got married recently and the brides family stipulated no kids under the age of 10. This pissed off my SIL's family immensly and half of them didn't turn up. My DD is 12 so attended but if she was under 10 and not allowed I don't think I could have gone.

I agree with Katierocket. I don't mind when my DSs are not invited to a wedding - if the invite just says "Tommy and DH", then I assume they're not invited and that's fine. I don't get invited to their friends' parties so I shouldn't assume they are always invited to my friends' parties but I find the peculiar custom of putting "NO CHILDREN" on an invitation particularly rude and unnecessary and, thank god, I have never received one or I'm not sure how I would react.

It's all a bit Chittychittybangbang-ish though isn't it?

We had a lovely BBQ garden party with extended family and kids and a separate kid free day for our vows with late night meal for a few close adults - we invited everybody to both, and outlined what was involved in both days. Babies were allowed on both days!!

Lots of people said it was the most enjoyable wedding as we seemed to have a ball both days.

We would prefer not to take our kids to a wedding they are to young
We would end up taking it in turns outside watching them playing than at the actual wedding
Nor would i be offended if the kids werent invited .If we could get a babysitter then we go and if we cant we don`t.

If my kids were going (2 and 5) I would be constantly worrying about whether they would sit still in church (would they heck) entertaining them during that boring bit between the ceremony and the dinner (which they would be unlikely to eat) and having to miss the speaches as they would be bored stiff by then and need to run off some energy.
And yes just as the disco hots up it's time for bed as they will still get up at 06.00 more grouchy after a late night.
And as a lot of couples get married later now the majority of friends are bound to have kids of varying ages. As other people have said not only expensive but multiply the noise of my two by a few...

do you think littlelapin?

I would think if there names weren't on the invite, then they are not invited!

Now that I think about it a bit more, I think it is tough for people who marry late-ish. When I got married (a long time ago) there were no children at the wedding because I didn't know anyone who had young children. If I were to get married now and have the same people for the reception there would be 50% more guests because of children and we wouldn't fit into the venue.

I had the wedding that I wanted, late on a winter's afternoon followed by a meal in a cosy venue with fewer than 100 guests. If all my friends had kids I would have had to go down a completely different route and had a totally different wedding.

Yep we've just had an invite like this too-i felt really angry (esp as the couple have lo who'll be going and is only 3months older than our ds!) I'll still be bfing too but luckily venue only half hour away so going to get mil to sit then leave before night do starts...

It just gets my goat,badly, and it reeks of bridezillas with their 'wedding organiser files' with swatches of the dress material pinned in so they can pick the right shade of sugared almond to match it.... Urgh, i feel ill at the very thought but each to their own