No HW, I think you are definately better of for maintaining your dignity and not socking her in the gob! Imagine the office gossip "well, it's no surprise he had an affair if he's been living with that!" or along the lines of
I'm all for maintaining dignity. When I 'row' I 'row' eloquently and dignified, I don't raise my voice, I just frustrate the hell out of whoever is trying to 'row' with me by using long words that they don't understand I love a good 'row', it's such fun!
Right HW, here is my take on things. Yes, you still have this anger, yes you may well have buried some of it in the beginning BUT, whatever the reasons the bottom line is that this is something you are feeling, it is something that you have control over byt changing your train of thoughts, your way of thinking, it isn't something that will be solved by physically taking revenge. It won't change anything. The affair will still have happened and OW will still exsist. All you will have served to do is lower yourself. I think you have handled everything in such an admirable way, (just as I would have done too) there is no way that I would give SG's the satisfaction of knowing the impact she had made on me and on my life, absolutely no way!! You are punishing her in the best possible way by simply appearing to dismiss her and get on with your life, rebuilding your marriage. Imagine if you were the OW, how would you feel if you were on her side of the fence looking at you? I know how I would feel! Infact, I think I would be living in fear that one day you were going to blowup and come and smack me in the gob!
I think you need to continue on the path you are already on. I also think (and forgive me for this cos I may be wrong) you need to work on your self esteem and self worth a bit more. The stronger you feel, the happier you feel, the less anyone can hurt you. Thats my secret. I have never been as happy with 'me' than I am now. I have waited a very long time for this day to come but it has been well worth the wait