I called the police on my daughter in law and it's gone wrong

[feellikechickentonight]

The other week I was walking my dog and I ended up walking past my son and daughter in law's house, as I walked past i could hear her going ballistic at what I presumed to be him. The house isnt too far back from the path and the bathroom window was open, hence being able to hear everything.

I listened for a minute or so and she was absolutely relentless, calling him awful names, for context he is physically disabled and some of those insults were related to his disability, I couldn't hear him responding in kind, just pleading with her to calm down and fearing for his safety i called the police and they said they'd check that everything was okay but couldn't give a time.

I went home as I had an appointment, i was also very angry at what I'd heard and was worried if I confronted them that it'd make the situation worse. A few hours later I got a phone call from my son asking me if I'd called the police, when I said yes he then got very terse and said what the hell was I doing, that they were having a very heated discussion about something, he confirmed that the police had been round, they'd spoken to him separately as I had told the police what I'd heard his wife screaming at him.

Anyway the police were happy it was a domestic dispute and they left, I've been told by my son to stay away from him and my grandson etc, my husband and other son have said that j completely overreacted, some couples have a row but it's better than not ever arguing and then one day just exploding. My daughter in law is said to be absolutely furious.

I'm heart broken, how do I fix this? I had hoped that the police would get social services involved due to them having a child and giving them a kick up the arse but it seems have backfired.

It’s heartbreaking to read that your instincts were right. I hope your DS and DGS will heal from this.

She does, but she won't. People like @MooMoo74 don't have the intelligence to accept when they are wrong. But she's humiliated herself by her nonsense and we all saw it.

I am sorry but kind of relieved to see your update op. It’s dreadful but let’s hope your son has had his eyes opened to how serious this is now. Two phone phone calls to the police in one week is not normal. I hope him and your dgc can heal with you.

And to all of the abuser apologists and downright vile people who gave the op stick for simply trying to protect her son, you should hang your heads in shame.

Like others have said, I'm horrified but also relieved by your update. Your son and grandchildren are going to be looked after and protected in the way you couldn't do on your own and now I hope you will all get support. Well done OP. Sending you and your family lots of love.

And yes, looking forward to the heaps of apologies from those who slated you for calling the police on an abuser.

yes , I’m also wondering where the apologies are but as you can see they have fled.

Hope he can make the break, OP.

I wouldn't trust her family. When push comes to shove they will turn against your son.

You knew OP. You trusted your instincts and did what you needed to for your son and now the neighbour has made a report and she has been arrested, your son has a chance to get out of this relationship, knowing you are there for him. Thank goodness your grandchild is at your house.

This thread has been one of the worst I’ve read on MN, sexist, victim blaming and vile towards OP.

Yep - and not ONE of those saying mean things or questioning the OP has had the grace to come back and apologise.

I'm sorry, I thought you were stirring, but I understand better now. I think if you had been open in the first post about what she was shouting, people wouldn't have been so judgy. Knowing someone else had called the cops on your DIL may have encouraged the neighbor to do the same. It also carried more weight being there were 2 calls, 2 events, etc. I hope things get better for your son and grandchild, and you as well..