Husbands food preferences driving me crazy - NEW THREAD

[Jessa85]

NEW THREAD for those following my thread from yesterday!

I will post the update of my conversation with my husband in a second.Original thread

I think that you should take more than 50% from the joint accounts. He has more savings and investments and a bigger salary and you will need to be able to pay the girls' and house bills until settlement is agreed. I think (not a lawyer), that as the accounts are joint, you can take as much as you want, legally.

You can tell him that you didn't do it to be vindictive but to ensure that you could look after the girls and the amount would be taken in to account in the settlement.

Just found this thread and read all of the OP posts.

Fucking hell I think you are incredible!

You have got this!

Has he even been in touch today? What’s the latest lies on where he’s at, what he’s doing etc

I think you should report him for financial abuse, then go for the throat when you get your financial settlement

And to think this all started with the arsehole husband refusing to eat creamy chicken dishes, chunky vegetables, salads and soup...

Wonder if the OW has clocked what a manchild he is over food yet?

She’s got the McCain smiley faces next to a bottle of plonk ready for the Big Return. Daft woman.

Hope she doesn't forget the ketchup.

Steady on El. That’s a bit off menu!

I’d move the savings now. If he is really thinking about separating this weekend he will shift that money. Don’t let him get there before you.

He has notifcations turned on for bank transfers, he will see it as soon as I do it. I need to wait until the right moment, which will be before Saturday.

I think expecting him to do housework after he gets home from work and you've been there all day is a bit much. My partner and I both work and we wouldn't dream of doing any housework on weekdays beyond loading/unloading the dishwasher and maybe washing up something that's hand wash only.

😂🤣😂

Cancel the cheque

I think that boat sailed more than one full thread ago, honestly.

@Jessa85

I'm not sure what your plan is (and not asking), but I'm assuming (again, not asking) that you plan to communicate to him once he's back that he isn't welcome at the house. If he is going to find out you want a divorce before you move the money you run the risk of him 'getting in there first' and either taking the lot or freezing the account. So best be ready with your finger on the trigger once you've told him.

Do you know if the airline he flies has wifi? If not, chances are he'll be 'out of mobile service area' in the air and you can move the money without him getting the notice until he lands. Of course, that will give him a 'head's up that something's up'.

One way you can tell, if you can 'see' him on your 'FindMy' and iPhone, is that if there is no mobile service FindMy will only show his last known location. My son flies frequently for work and he's explained to me that if it shows him at the airport when he's actually in the air it means there's no mobile service on the flight. I guess I'd asked him if he'd missed his flight one too many times lol.

Good luck, you're a real champion.

Oh, also, you may want to move that over to your Monzo account at some point if your 'usual' account is at the same bank as his. My son was advised that he should have NO accounts at the same bank to avoid any 'slip ups'.

Wishing you the very best of luck! I've read your entire thread and feel very invested! Please update when it's all over. Xxxxx

OP works FT. RTFT.

I also work full-time so I don’t understand why it’s my responsibility 🤔

I think you’re doing great OP!

One small thing, you mention calling your solicitor a lot. Be mindful that they are on the clock and will be charging you everytime you ring. Try consider things and research before you call them….. or you will get a massive bill!

This.
It's you and your two girls. You should take more than 50%.
To get any penny from him will be like getting water from a rock. Whether you take 0%, 50% or 75%.
He will not play fair. And he will not get told off or even hugely penalised for not playing fair.
Divorce is a very unfair game. Some will say a dirty game. And it is rarely that the naughty ones come worse off. They seem to get away with it.
Be aware he will be nasty.

No, you never take more than 50%. That is half of the joint asset and that's the 'starting point'. It will be up to the courts if they want to award additional funds.

But I'm sure @Jessa85 's solicitor has already told her this.

She cannot and shouldn’t take more than 50% at this point

@Jessa85 I’m sure you’re on top of this, and I completely understand that you don’t want to jeopardize anything that might benefit you right now. But have you sought legal advice specifically regarding the financial and emotional abuse?

Even if you’re not planning to take action at the moment, understanding what evidence you’d need, the process, and the potential implications could put you in a strong position should you decide to move forward later. It might feel like a distraction if you’ve ruled it out for now, but having that knowledge could help you make a fully informed decision down the line.

And if a conviction were to happen, it could be disclosed through Clare’s Law—a little Brucie bonus for this or any other OW😀

mmm, I'd be checking when his flight leaves and then doing the transfer. It's unavoidable that he will get the notification when he lands, but I think the first sniff he gets of you being ahead of the game in anyway, he will empty the account.

Solicitor said 50% so that’s what I’m taking 😊

I have taken advice and I didn’t want to post on here exactly what’s happening but my solicitor is looking at every bit of information I have given.