AIBU for expecting him to pay?

[fl00b]

My partner moved in 6 weeks ago after our son was born. Since then he hasn't paid, or offered to pay for anything towards bills or rent. The past week I've had to send him over £100 too as he's had no money for petrol or food at work. I also pay for all his food at mine. He used to live with his mum and pay her board.

I've received my first wage slip from work with my maternity pay on and I can't live on such a low amount whilst supporting a house, 4 children and him. I'm also not entitled to any benefits because he lives with me and works.

I hinted to him that I might need him to start helping out by showing him my wage-slip, and his words were that I could explore going back to work for 2 days a week (my son is only 6 weeks old) then I think the penny dropped for him and he offered to give me some money. However deep down I feel awful for taking off him which I know I shouldn't, but I don't know how else I'm meant to survive.

Yanbu for expecting him to contribute ti the cost of rent/bills/fuel. Just like every other adult.

Why would he be exempt from that?

"Steve I'd like you to contribute 50% of the bills while we're living together."

"You'll have to go back to your Mums then. Then I'll claim benefits so I can feed my children, bye".

You refer to him.as partner. Well if it's a partnership he needs to step up.

Why are you hesitant about not dealing with this together??

Of course he needs to contribute. What's he spending his wages on if not giving towards living at yours. He's taking the piss massively. Tell him he pays up or he can piss off back to his mummy

FFS. Why are you enabling this lazy freeloader? You are not his mummy. Send him back and start claiming maintenance.

Why do women get pregnant by man children

@Jollyhockeystickss , because they have unprotected sex with them.

Maybe there should be a MN guide to 'How to spot if a man is a man child'

Is this even a real post??

He’s a catch…. NOT! Kick him out now! Stop being a mug.

Jesus fucking christ, stop being so bloody wet! Why on earth would you feel bad for expecting a grown man, a FATHER, to financially support himself? You should be disgusted with him that he hasn't proactively sorted out bills with you.

I give up, so many women seem absolutely determined to fuck themselves over.

I have reported it for not being genuine. I am awaiting a response.

What a strange thread. You don't think you should be asking the father of your child to contribute towards the bills, whilst he lives with you rent free? Why do you feel bad about asking a grown man to pay his way? And why hasn't it occurred to him to pay maintenance for his son?

I wondered about that

You're not taking off him. He's supporting his family, as he should be. He has a new baby whom he should be parenting equally. Obviously the older children who are not his should be supported by their own fathers but he ought to be paying half of the rent and bills for the house he lives in and half of costs towards his own children.

Why are you paying for everything, AND then lending him money on top? Where the hell is his own money going?

Gambling addiction?
Alcohol/drug addiction?
Prostitutes?

He needs to be paying more than 50% btw because you’ll have lost benefits with him moving in. If he doesn’t want to have to provide for your other children then he moves out.

What a load of shite😂

Fuck "hinting". Why can't you have an open conversation with this man about money? And if you can't do that he shouldn't be living in your home.

OP, you are an adult woman with four children. You need to be able to talk to your partner about money and agree something fair. He needs to pay to his own living costs and contribute to those of his child, and to support his child's mother while she's on maternity leave. What are you thinking of, letting him move in without making any arrangement?

If this truly is real, then fucking Hell. I've no words.

I reported it half an hour ago and it's still here,so MNHQ must think it's genuine.

It's funny there's no update from OP though. 🤔

Am guessing op not coming back 🤔

You've got yourself a cocklodger, OP. Throw him out.

wouldn’t call him a man. you just took a kid from his parent’s home. time to send him back

@fl00b Partner?!! I'm more of a partner to you than this man and we've never met. At least I'm not making your life worse and costing you money.

He either gives you money or you tell him to leave and you claim CSA.

Tell him he needs to move out. You shouldn't have to tell an adult man you've had a child with that he needs to contribute to your life together; nor should you have to sub him money when he is working, you are on maternity leave, and he's not contributing anything at all to the household financially.