My boyfriend said my vagina scares him ??

[Meeemeee88]

I feel really upset over this and it’s stupid I know . But basically I’ve had three babies ( including one with said partner ) I’ve suffered from terrible self confidence issues regarding my lady part ( have a slight prolapse and obviously it’s changed a lot since births etc like no matter how much I do pelvic floors it makes no difference) so I feel like it’s horrible and there’s not much I can do about it , HE KNOWS all this . Anyway while I was in hospital last week my partner out of nowhere just said “ my vagina scares him !??” What the hell does that mean ? He wouldn’t elaborate just said it’s MEATY !?? Wtf . I’m now really annoyed to the point I don’t even want him to touch me now . AIBU ???

Than he would say that wouldn't he? Saying that it "scares him", and is "meaty", aren't concerned comments.

These are horrible and hurtful comments and he's a dick for saying them. Can I ask how long ago did you give birth and was he there?

I just wanted to say try not to worry if it was a recent birth that your pelvic floor exercises aren't working etc. I feel like it took a whole year after I gave birth to be fully back to 'normal'. In any case he sounds extremely immature.

Then ditch him. You don't need this. There are plenty of men out there who wouldn't ever dream of saying something so hateful. x

I am shocked at the amount of comments on here suggesting that OP should leave her partner and the father of her child because of this. Christ! It's hurtful OP but talk to him and find out what's going on. LTB seems a bit much.

You can't unring a bell can you? I'd be booting him out

But in your other thread you talked about having 3 kids with your ex-partner. Where did this gross boyfriend come from?

Good grief, he sounds like he is 13 years old!
Completely immature and to be honest also misogynistic. Your partner is supposed to build you up not tear you down. Please don’t look to yourself for the problem. The problem is quite clearly him. You don’t have to put up with this, you really don’t. If he needs lessons in basic decency and respect, he is not for you. You deserve better.

Or play him this when he takes his pants off

https://youtube.com/shorts/fP3F-_U0jTY?si=zuXZCPQZtO4DX2Ex

Yes I know . I actually do have another baby with another man on top of my 3 children . I didn’t want to give exact details on things to full extent in case someone I knew saw my posts . My current partner is extremely private about things . He would go absolutely nuts if he knew I was posting my personal life on here

I have the most gorgeous, luscious, generous labia and I am thrilled about them.

More to play with and enjoy for those given the privilege to come near me in an intimate way.

All vulvas are unique and great. Any man that has anything negative to say is seriously misogynistic and clearly doesn't actually like you as a person.

The only person you should be with is one who feels lucky to be in that room with you.

So he sits and stares at your vagina does he? No he doesn’t. He didn’t know what it looked like in detail before and he doesn’t now. No man spends so much time down there to remember all the nooks and crannies.

I’ve been married 25yrs, had 2 children and had a vagina trauma during the first birth. I can see where they stitched me up if I study the area but I only looked once after my stitches were removed and that was almost 20yrs ago. Just asked DH and he just shook his head and said he doesn’t spend much time looking!

Honestly I don’t think I could ever forget him saying that to me. I’d have to end it.

Yeah if he’s looking in detail he’s not working hard enough to pleasure you. He is NOT a keeper. Dump him.

He might be good looking but he’s an ugly prick on the inside. All show and no substance. It’s great you don’t live together. Dump him and have him take the baby on the weekends.

The awful thing that no one tells you is that for 80% of women in menopause those flaps reduce massively in size and shrivel. So in just another 10 years you’ll be glad of your meaty vagina because it’ll protect you somewhat from shrivellage!

Those women who changed themselves to be all things to porn will be in pain and very very dry because there’ll be nothing there to shrivel up and I can’t imagine how things go why you’re pretty much flapless. It must be killer. I guess vaginal estrogen might help but all the same, au naturel is surely better if you can get away with it!

Your partner sounds like he’s playing mind games. Does he want to be a dad? The fact he’s rejecting you sexually is ok (we don’t always feel like it) but nor explaining and just walking away is a very poor way to treat someone, especially given what he’s said.

It sounds like he’s criticising you for having children. He wants your muff intact? Should have thought about that before getting you pregnant. He’s really very very immature. Unfortunately 33 is still so young for some men these days. Utterly shallow fools.

This isn't the right thing to do but if it were me I would completely ignore him totally and if he wants to see you say you are beyond offended and will not entertain his behaviour, just leave him until he can apolagise or explain, I wouldn't talk to him or explain anything, I would just blank him..

Bollocks to him. Bodies change. It's natural.

He is not worth your time and he is certainly not worth your tears.

That's a revolting thing to say. I'm so sorry. You deserve better. He's a twat. Please don't put up with this. It's better to be single than with someone undermining your confidence, especially in such a personal attack. Ugh.

Well unless it looks like Brad Pitt he really should keep his mouth shut.

Yes, and so does sunrise, driving and the prospect of responsibility.
Brilliant.
Get rid.

He’s scared of you. He’s knows you can see through his bull. He hates that.

If someone said that to me, I'd assume they were gay.

Here's hoping he will grow up one day. Best wishes to you and your kids. :)

It's from porn @Meeemeee88

Go and have a look yourself. Probably a majority of women have issues and insecurities about how they look. It’s very helpful to realise how ordinary we are with our non-porn parts.

When you say pelvic floor exercises aren’t helping - helping with what? Appearance? Function? It might be worth seeing a specialist physiotherapist, for advice. I wasn’t doing PFEs correctly, and contributing to some of my problems.

There have been plenty of comments about what your dp said, but at the end of the day, how you are affected by a comment like that is related to how you feel about it. What he said, how he feels and the reasons for his comment (immaturity, insensitivity, a desire to humiliate,etc) are all important but none of those things are as important as being at peace in your own body.