Boyfriend following "Anti feminist" women on Instagram and twitter

[Applepop]

Would that worry you? We've been together 3 and a half years.
He has only just started following/ sending me stuff from these people.

We are supposed to move in together soon and I'm a little concerned about it, it's not Andrew Tate level ( he says he hates him)
I'm not sure if I can put the accounts on here ?

He's never he has never expressed anything misogynistic to me before

"He's in a house share"

@Applepop oh of course he's in a house share OP. A man who has issues with 'feminism' has absolutely no issue with leaching off a woman? Give me a break! And give yourself one before allowing this waste of space to move in with you. I am yet to see a single one of these 'anti-feminism' men able to take on a traditional 'masculine' role in their lives and relationships. Such as being the sole provider.

He's moving into YOUR house and he's spouting this nonsense at you? The absolute gall of it. Tell him if he's all for traditional values to get off his arse, get off social media, and make enough money to keep you and a family in comfort, safety and security until the end of his life and he'll be welcome to be as 'anti-feminist' as he likes.

I am so tired of these nothing men making out like we're the problem.

Hmmm, why don't you guys wait until he's finished uni to move in together?

Or he should be paying his share of bills out of his student loans.

Not sure why you're in a rush to support him through uni.

Twitter handles are, by definition, public. So you absolutely can tell us the twitter handle that this account is linked to. If, outside of twitter, you know this person's real name, adress and work details then no, you could NOT share those.

The problem is that these "jokes" are not funny unless on some level, you agree with it. Was it shakespear who said, "never a truer word spoken than in jest"? or something similar?

As for you paying the bills while he finishes uni... hahaha. that sounds like a terrible plan. Is he at least going to be paying you EXACTLY the same amount that his househare costs now including rent, bills and food?

"You're right that there is some debate about exactly what feminism is, and there are some nuances in the definition. But I have never, until your posts today, come across a single person who identifies as a feminist and who thinks that feminists today want men to be more feminine. Unless you consider it being more "feminine" to believe that no, it's not your god given right to get that job, that woman, that sexual gratification just because you are a man.

Again, I think you're consuing feminists' issues with toxic masculinity (which absolutely is a thing) and so-called "feminine traits". Because again, if you think feminists want men to have more "feminine traits" in the form of actually doing their share of parenting rather than assuming a woman will do it, then perhaps you're right. But the point for most of us is that these shouldn't be considered feminine but rather just normal, healthy behaviour of adults who are parents."

@OhBling I completely agree with you. This 'masculine' and 'feminine' nonsense is destructive to both men and women.

I couldn’t agree more. He would NOT have time to spew this junk if he were working hard and being a ‘traditional man’. He sounds like a child with too much time on his hands and a penchant for using a woman while he's building himself up. The reality check will be once he's squeezed her dry, he will leave her because she will serve as a reminder of those days when he was 'useless'. It happens far too often.

He’s sending you the sexist crap for a reason. And he’s just about to enjoy using you - you’ll be financially supporting him.

Do not do this. Do not move in with him until he has a job. Don’t be a complete mug. I guarantee if you move in with him and support him you will regret it.

If he loves and respects you, let him stay in the house share until you can move in together on an equal footing. If he stops sending you sexist bullshit that is and understands how beyond the pale that is.

Exactly what @Girlmom35 said.

You have to be ready to ask questions, be prepared for answers you might not like and be prepared to push back if you get woolly replies such as ' it's a joke' ' I'm only joking ' ' you're too sensitive '.

In simple terms a guy who enjoys been humiliated by a women, probably more so a fetish of some men, it can get darker but I'll just share the basic to you..

He’s sending you misogynistic nonsense, it hasn’t occurred to you to ask him why, and you’re moving him in to cocklodge.

Unless you wise up rather quickly, we will be reading your post in X years about your sexist cocklodger who does no housework, expects you to pay the bills, but also lectures you about a ‘woman’s place’. You’ll be saying things like ‘there were no signs of any of this before we moved in together’ and ‘I don’t know how this happened’. 😒

Tell him:

‘Since you have these views, I’m happy to move in with YOU. Have YOU pay all the bills and give ME an allowance to work less and be comfortable.' He will vehemently refuse because he can't.

That's how I responded to one of my earlier boyfriends when I was 20. Flip the script.

Don't let him move in until he has a job!
That is an advice to anyone of any gender!

Of course, he will pay nothing. He’s probably half-decent in bed and will use this to his advantage.

I echo your thoughts.

Likewise, I have never seen one of these men step up to the precipice and provide. Heaven forbid women to reject their advances because we manage just fine without them.

The Instagram - I don't think is too bad,I just find her really annoying for some reason

Not sure what MGTOW is

Oh dear I see that a lot of you think moving in together right now it a very bad idea.

Unfortunately I've already said he can so I can't change my mind now and leave him with nowhere to go can I ?

Soy-boys and simps🙄 Are you a 14 year-old boy?

It's ok not to 'identify as' a feminist by name... I guess. But what the OP says her boyfriend is following is anti-feminist. Against women having eqality? No thanks. Bin him, OP. He's giving you a little taste of what he really thinks of women.

"Likewise, I have never seen one of these men step up to the precipice and provide. Heaven forbid women to reject their advances because we manage just fine without them"

@ClapKissBang exactly, and thankfully the younger generation of women do not seem to be falling for this incel bullshit. Every so often I see a variation of a particular meme on social media with young women asking the questions of "what house?" and "what gold?" when men say they want a housewife and do not want to be with a gold digger.

It's been a long, long, long time since I have met a man who has been able to be a sole breadwinner. There isn't a single one in my circle and I know some pretty well off people.

He can return to his flat share. Tell him something has cropped up.

What on earth is an anti-feminist woman? I don’t have Instagram or anything like that. What kind of things are they saying?

Yes you can. He is attempting to train you by sending this bullshit to you now just as he is about to move in. With no job and no money. Come on OP, do yourself a favour.

Even though I listen to a lot of content that contains ideas I don't agree with, I understand why you're concerned, and it's wise to be,given that you're a woman and you're more vulnerable.

I've had a look at what you've posted and it really doesn't look good. These (usually) attractive female influencers seem much adored by men who feel hard-done by, and are sceptical of the 'feminist agenda' as they call it. They're looking for confirmation of what they want & believe in - which is a feminine, delicate looking woman who is far more pre-occupied with advocating for men's needs & interests than she is her own.

Tread very carefully. A lot of women who end up posting on Mumsnet seem to have had children with men that had very 1950s ideals, thinking they were on the same politically when the men just kept quiet until it was too late for her to back out.

How depressing.

Of course you can change your mind. You can change your mind at any point. Student or not, he is a grown adult and responsible for himself.

It might be better to wait until he has a job, so you can start off on a 50/50 basis.

Are you afraid he will kick off if you say no to him?

Well, she’s a good-looking woman with a large following - most of whom are men, including your boyfriend. It takes a particular type of man to appreciate content like this and begin to indoctrinate their partners.

They are usually pretty, young women who are pandering to fragile male egos and working to undermine and misrepresent what feminism actually is while still enjoying all of the bounties of feminism's work, such as having a career, a bank account, being able to drive, access to maternity healthcare etc etc. It's pathetic and baffling in equal measure.