Is this the behavior of an adult man?

[Adri4]

Hi there! We met on a dating site. We talked for 2 months, he said that he fell in love with me, compliments every day, that he was afraid of losing me, that I am the one whom he wanted all his life and he wants kids with me. We live on different continents, he said he wanted to come see me after he saw me on a video call. At first he said that he would come in 2 months, but now he says in 4 months. The guy constantly wanted to talk to me via video, but I have work, I have other things to do, I can get sick, I’m a living person, but he continued to insist, although he saw that such pressure was stressing me out. Moreover, there was no trust in him, if he were really in love, he would have come to see me long ago. Relations began to get worse. Then he disappeared for 2 weeks, came back and said that he had a lot on his mind. I forgave him, but the relationship cooled. Trust is gone. He admitted that his ex showed up, but he just talked to her and gave her advice in a difficult situation, although she wants to get the relationship back but he said he doesn’t want her in his life, she cheated on him. One day he asked if I could talk via video today, I said that I could in an hour or tomorrow, he replied, “choose it yourself, im home”, later I texted that I was ready to talk, he said that he would be home in 15 minutes, he came and texted that he was ready to talk, after 5 minutes I called via video call, and he picked up the phone without a video call, just like a regular call and said that he had to get out, he was in the car, and said “sorry it didn’t work out today, let’s do it tomorrow.” I turned off the video, then texted “I thought you’re home” “next time be more specific in time”, he wrote “you are very difficult” I replied “yes, you can’t handle me, find someone easier” he replied that he's done talking to me and blocked me. Is this the behavior of an adult 43 year old man?

He lives there , I checked his social despite that we didn’t exchange our social , I did research myself

and you've never met a single man like this in the UK, or matched with someone like this online? Not once? I mean, it's not a hugely high bar. DH and I didn't talk children on day one, obviously, but it was pretty obvious pretty quickly that he wasn't looking for a bit of fun but rather a proper relationship that would lead to marriage and children. And certainly, there was never any huge pressure to have sex on day 1.

And I think that's not THAT unusual.

Yes, we did FaceTime but he wanted more and more , that’s why he got mad

Wow. And you obviously believed all of that, immediately and without having even met him.

You're a scammers dream @Adri4

So he was after a cheap thrill?

Yes, you’re right

I'm sorry, but you are still being very naive. You can't verify someone's existence from a social media account. Social media accounts can be cloned, friends can be 'stolen' and pictures from other people's accounts reused.

OP, you are not in a relationship with this man and you never have been. He is a stranger from the internet and you know nothing about his life. He almost certainly isn't who he claims to be. He is literally just a random bloke.

You do sound very vulnerable and very gullible, I'm sorry. Cut him off and stop trying 'meet' men in this way until you've worked on boundaries and trust, because at the moment you have too little of both.

Ah. This lovely man got mad?

Who does he think he is, getting mad with you like that?

@Adri4 "checking his socials" means nothing. Many of these people set up fake and elaborate social media profiles for the sole purpose of scamming others.

What kind of work does he do?

Anyone can put up a fake social media page by the way. He's either a scammer or some creep looking for a thrill. Either way, he wasn't in love with you and this wasn't and isn't a relationship. You sound very naive.

agree

Sounds like a scammer after a passport.

Exactly :)

“You're a scammers dream”, hope not anymore) I haven’t experienced something like this before , never talked to guys on dating sites

I think so …

Yes, thank you , I’m done with such ways of talking

Because no one who wasn’t vulnerable would believe his bullshit.

When we started talking, he didn’t ask about my job and neither did I… then I did some research on LinkedIn, found out that he’s a salesperson , sale products around the US. But then he confessed that bc of his injured he left his old job (sales) and now do Uber , and asked if it bother me , I said I don’t mind about money … and really I don’t.. And yes I’m beautiful but probably not that smart…

What on earth kind of injury stops you doing sales but means you can drive a cab?

Exactly!!! Girls , my thoughts about him were just like yours … I saw every flags , every lies but something made me talk to him!!! And bc this injury he allegedly could not come … he said he had bad shoulder injury and he needs to do shot and after that he needs 2-3 months to recover that’s why he can’t come now …

Have you ever had a relationship op? With an actual real life person rather than online?

This whole thing is just weird. You say you are not vulnerable but you clearly are if you fall for stuff like this. It doesn't sound like you are ready for a relationship op

Yes, just once

It really is plain as day that this is almost certainly a scammer, who is doing the same thing to several women - but I still don't think you're accepting that, @Adri4?

You're not the first, and you won't be the last, but I think you do need to accept that at the very best, least likely, case this 'relationship' would go nowhere - but there's every chance this is not a relationship at all.

If you blocked him, how did he manage to contact you again? You need to make sure he can't.