Anyone on here actually got a decent man?

[ALMummy]

I am curious to know whether anyone on MN actually has a DH or DP who does all or most of the following:

1. Is faithful
2. Does not behave abusively towards you either physically, verbally or emotionally in any way.
3. Is fair when it comes to finances.
4. Helps with housework and childcare.
5. Is supportive about things that are important to you.

I ask this because I read so many sad stories on here and in RL my friends all seem to have utter pigs for partners and I am beginning to wonder if ANYONE actually has a decent relationship, do they actually exist? How common is it? Am I living in Cloud Cuckoo land to expect any or all of the above?

I tick two of those boxes...

no, i'm pretty crap. luckily my dh loves me!

Yes and i have been training him for the last 20 years No, seriously he's a star, although does sometimes air on the side of being a miserable git.

BTW - ALMummy - you sound far too good for him. I'm sorry you are having a hard time.

Definitely. Neither of us is to keen on housework but we manage to divvy it up. He's very keen on the childcare front though - puts me to shame actually. Very supportive of my various life missions. I'm such a grumpy old bag it doesn't do to do otherwise.

Always room for the odd moan though!

Perhpas I'm too selfish to tolerate crap behaviour.

Mine ticks all of the boxes. He is a star and I really don't know why he puts up with me.

Yep I do mines great, although sometimes he needs a little boot with his share of the housework, but we both work long hours, and he's very good with the kids, especially in the morning

because I'm smugly with my perfect man

Yes, me (I think). Only been going out a year and we don't live together, but he is an absolute blardy sweetheart, as far as I can tell.

Yes. I realised this the day I met him. I had previously lived with a toad, and been out with enough frogs to recognise a prince instantly. 9 years and 2 kids later he is still the best partner and hands on daddy that I know of.
And he puts up with MEEEEEE that has to be worth a few medals for above and beyond the call of duty.
And now I need to get off this thread and hide it so he won't get bigheaded!

Sorry forgot to say that yes honestly I can tick all your boxes about him.
All my ex boyfriends I think would manage about 2 ticks between the lot of them.

Yeap, all of these plus he's gorgeous.

Yes, my husband is a lovely, considerate family man and has been a joy to live with

Agree that there have been some really sad threads on here recently.
because of them I have alternated between smothering dh with kisses for being so wonderful and eyeing him suspiciously

At the same time Flynnie?
Personally, I think it takes a certain type of man to cheat

Flynnie, me too There are times on here when you realize just how good you have it compared to other poor souls.

There's no denying he is a complete twunt at times but for the most part, yeah, he is pretty special

dh is a fab man! he comes with a few problem areas, a manual and troubleshooting guide- this usually gets us through although a remote control would be highly useful!

seriously- i think i'm lucky when i see what friends have or are going through. all relationships have wobbles- some more serious than others! dh however is my rock he supports me and never tells me i'm wrong (mainly because i am NEVER wrong )

i do, he is truly lovely, he does still annoy me sometimes tho x

i have a very decent man i wouldn't accept anything else.
he has ticked all those boxes over the years and i could add lots more to the list of things that make him perfect.
sadly he isn't able to do housework these days, but he is still very lovely so i will let him off

My Dh ticks all the boxes and he is a brill dad.
He is currently upstairs decorationg dd's bedroom while I am mumsnettting!

Mine does all of the above and does them very well. He cooks, he gets up with the kids and helps me clean up even though he works full time and I work part time. He believes in marriage, fidelity, and the family unit as more important than anything. He believes that the best thing he can do for his kids is love their mum and treat her right.

I sure hope he never has a "mid life".

My partner is a grumpy shouty old bugger quite often, but otherwise is a very nice bloke. And is utterly supportive of my work and career and general Right To Be Me.

I'm slightly gobsmacked by some of your points, actually. Especially the ones about 'fair about finances' and 'helps with the housework/childcare'. I think it's really sad that those are even issues. Mr Inferior doesn't 'help' - it's his house and kids just as much as mine, I rather think.

Yes. Mine ticks all those boxes.

But then I wouldn't have married him and had children with him if he didn't.