Anyone on here actually got a decent man?

[ALMummy]

I am curious to know whether anyone on MN actually has a DH or DP who does all or most of the following:

1. Is faithful
2. Does not behave abusively towards you either physically, verbally or emotionally in any way.
3. Is fair when it comes to finances.
4. Helps with housework and childcare.
5. Is supportive about things that are important to you.

I ask this because I read so many sad stories on here and in RL my friends all seem to have utter pigs for partners and I am beginning to wonder if ANYONE actually has a decent relationship, do they actually exist? How common is it? Am I living in Cloud Cuckoo land to expect any or all of the above?

All of the above - in fact doesn't "help" with the childcare - accepts more than his responsibility with the dds. Very patient as a dad. Brings me drinks in bed every morning.

100% faithful. Generally gorgeous. I would feel mean moaning about him on mnet (I don't judge those that do, our circumstances are different I am sure).

Yep. So far, so good. Been together for 7 years.
DH has always been faithful, as far as I know .
He's never been abusive towards me in any way - he's a very gentle person by nature and always treats me with care and respect.
He's extremely fair and forward thinking re: finances.
He does more housework than I do (despite the fact he works full time and I am a SAHM!) and he is devoted to our son and will happily do his fair share of wiping bums and getting up in the night.
He's the most supportive person in my life (well, alongside my mum ).
He supports me whatever I choose to do and he is basically like my number one fan, big brother and lover rolled into one (sorry, that sounds odd, but you know what I mean..).

God, I love my DH.

I count myself extremely lucky. I went out with some right wasters tossers twits in my younger days.

PS agonybeetle I LOVE your name!!! are you training your children up to be in a jazz band?

My dh is lovely. Has just spent an hour getting unsettled dd to sleep. Looked in, they were both snoring together

He is my rock & I am his.

Yes to all your questions - I have a great DP. Though I do feel we arrived at where we are with a lot of work... we split up early on and when got back together it was on a different footing. We know a lot now about how to keep talking and all that - that took time to learn.

I think we do both have moans to make about each other and we do have rows, but not often.

However our closest couply friends have just split up - and I thought he was a lovely man too but he has cheated and ruined everything. it's really shaken us and made us realise you never really know how good your relationship is. You just have to keep trying.

My dh scores a big fat YES to all of those, (he is just a teensy bit on the tight side with his wallet but, not at Xmas or Birthdays).... and no, he does not have a brother for the rest of you.

mine's fab

[slight issues with number 4a housework - needs direction but brill with 4b]

and he gets on with my mum

Yes to all of those.

I have a whinge and blame him for not doing enough with #4 but i do as little as him tbh.

Just texting him (he is in the other room ) to tell him i love him

1. Is faithful yep
2. Does not behave abusively towards you either physically, verbally or emotionally in any way. yep
3. Is fair when it comes to finances. very
4. Helps with housework and childcare. yes
5. Is supportive about things that are important to you 90%

i have a decent man.well,he is decent in the ways that matter to me

my motto was always 'youve got to kiss alot of frogs before you meet the handsome prince',although i had actually given up by the time i met dh.

DH is a star kind, supportive & sexy hubby and a fab father to dd. Am v. lucky woman and will tell him more.

1. Absolutely
2. Deos none of those, but can be a bit moody sometimes, and we do have the odd ding-dong but it's usually blown over within an hour or two.
3. Yup, everything 50/50 now I'm not working
4. Does all the cooking and tidying and childcare when he is here, but as he works away and I'm on my own for four out of seven days, it works out pretty even.
5. He is incredibly supportive of me and my things, and is helping to fund my new business venture from the sale of his old batchelor pad.

and he tells me I'm sexy (even though I don't feel it) and makes me laugh and understands my depression, and brings me a cup of tea in bed every morning he's here, and buys me the most beeeeoutiful exotic flowers for special occasions. He is grand really

my DH ticks all the boxes you describe
sometimes he gets lost in a book/s (he's an academic) and I have to boot him back into the real world but he is always very co-operative to be booted and re-join us

Mine too, I am soooo lucky
We drive each other mad sometimes but I wouldn't be without him for the world! He ticks all the above boxes, he's lovely!

Yes.

Well I dont know how to look at this. Happy that good relationships exist or depressed because mine is so crap . I must admit it has given me food for thought though and maybe a bit of a push.

Mine ticks all the boxes and I dont let him do the housework as he works really hard and I am currently a SAHM.

He loves me to bits as well and says I am gorgeous and sexy (even tho I know I am a bit overweight!)

.....and he does 99% of the cooking!!

and he walks round the shops with me if I want to go clothes shopping....

.....and he never comments on any money I might have spent or ever complains....

....we are polar opposites but sooooo right for each other and I really love him.....

Your last comment was interesting ALMummy as you are the OP.

What is wrong with your DH? Are you together?

My husband is my best friend and I feel very lucky to have him. Yes to all of the above 100%. I got married at 19 and we have been together 24 years this year, I don't know what I'd do without him.

Yes to all but 2

We are together collision but is a complete pig tbh. I have posted about him quite a few times with name changed because I feel embarrassed that I have put up with so much crap. Put it this way he does none of the 5 points. He loves his kids hugely but thats it. I haveave spent a life being told that relationships need to to be "worked at" so thats what I have tried to do. Know a lot of unhappy couples as well and I sort of thought that most relationships were like that but I see from all of your posts that this is not the case.

Yes here too. I knew him years ago when I went to school with his sister and fancied him then.
Met up again 9 years ago got married and three kids later we are still very happy (most of the time )