Most men working in Finance or Law in city of London are narcissists?

[PoliteEagle]

I am dating with an intent to find a serious relationship. I live in Kensington in West London and most of my local dates are finance or law guys. While they are very successful, their personalities are let's say ... difficult. All of them either had full blown narcs traits or at least being very selfish. A friend of mine says they are all like that and I should skip any guy working in Finance or Law and dont waste time with them. I will remove lots of people from my pool by doing so, but my experience so far confirms her words.. Would you agree that most men working in Finance / Law in city of London are narcissists and not really suitable for a relationship?

You seem confused and dogmatic, @PoliteEagle. Perhaps think about why you seem to be meeting with little success in dating, and why your attempts to dictate other posters’ responses to you on here aren’t going down a storm.

Perhaps think about why you are keeping posting nonsense

I don’t claim to have it. I have it. Not the money like you claim to have but I am able to financially support myself and contribute towards my family (I earn nearly 70k in a meaningful professional job despite having a toddler and a baby on the way). I have husband who loves me who I didn’t have to desperately seek out for material gain and children who I don’t exploit for access to his money. We are equal partners financially, in terms of our relationship and in terms of our parental responsibility. I don’t value living in Kensington, going to the gym or having manicures over my career or the people I love. It is deeply sad that you do and perhaps that is why things are pretty empty for you right now beyond Hinge.

ps The lawyers and city boys you are meeting on OLD won’t leave their immediate area because you are a hook up option, not potential wife or mother.

Yes I accept all that but people want different things from life. For me I wasn't at all career minded and being a SAHM and bringing up our 4 children was very important to me and I loved the fact I was married to a man who could support me and our children financially and provide a really good standard of living.

Which is absolutely fine- don’t get me wrong I have nothing against SAHM. I know people want different things in life, circumstances differ and I understand just how hard it is looking after young children full time- when I am not working I find it very rewarding but also absolutely exhausting. If being a SAHM works for you and your husband is able/wants to have financial responsibility for your family then that’s entirely your decision and I respect it completely.

However that’s very different to the scenario the OP is proposing as I assume you and your husband met, fell in love and then made mutual decisions for the benefit of your whole family. The OP has no husband. She is not even in a relationship. She is not in love. She is not expecting a child. She wants a husband and children with a man she doesn’t know (any man) based solely on the criteria of location, status and salary. Love and family don’t appear to come in to it- or if they do they are nowhere near as high on the priority list as maintaining a certain aspirational lifestyle without having to pay for it.

you sound very jaded. I highly doubt you are happy in your family and career. Happy women do not sound like you, they sound happy.
And you know what? tomorrow even not your rich husband can leave you and you can end up on hinge as well haha. By the way you sound it will come very shortly!

@Givemegoldensun You've been horrible to the OP. Truly vile. Why? Because she wants different things to you? She’s not hurting anyone and if you don’t like her, you could have just come off her thread and left her alone.

You can’t lob bile at someone for multiple comments and then be outraged when they finally bite back.

Happy women don’t sound like you either, op…

@PoliteEagle I am dating with an intent to find a serious relationship. I live in Kensington in West London and most of my local dates are finance or law guys. While they are very successful, their personalities are let's say ... difficult. All of them either had full blown narcs traits or at least being very selfish.

Given that the overwhelming majority of men do not work in either finance or law, is there any reason why you are specifically targetting men who work in these fields for dates?

It seems like a really strange criterion to apply to your dating life: "must be a man who works in finance or law." Really weird. Currently I am not dating, but I would place most importance on a person's character, their worldview, how compassionate they are, and how they treat other people.

Dating should really cover people from all jobs and professions, rather than limiting things right down to two specific fields of work.

Yes many are. You have to ask what draws them into those positions. Finance is a bit vague tbh- you could be on the phones selling insurance, or a day trader. It differs.

No doubt that certain careers attract narcissists- anything with power and deception and superior complexities/saviour complexities/ self promotion

Pilots (notorious)
Police
Sales
Military
Certain Academics
Certain Medical Roles.
Law
Politics
Entertainment

These are at least amber flags.
Go for engineers or a tradesperson. You want a problem solver and fixer

Yes, agree with this, this is my experience too.

Smart men in law and finance who are worth it can spot a gold digger from a mile away. Simple as

Go for engineers or a tradesperson. You want a problem solver and fixer

Not sure a plumber is going to be able to keep OP in the manner to which she wishes to become accustomed.

Wow. you don't even have children yet and your telling other woman they can't be happy with a career and a family. She doesn't sound jaded at all, she sounds normal.

I love my children and I love my career, no it's not always been easy to have both but I feel so lucky to have had good employers who value work life balance.

If that was true, it would confirm that OP is truly disconnected from the real world.

Tbh, I didnt want to go this route, but this woman kept attacking and insulting me for 3 days in a row despite me asking her politely to stop. My patience is limited unfortunately

i just said you may end up on apps as well. So your condescending attitude to women who are on apps can turn against you as you may end on them sooner or later. And yes, if you read relationships thread it is common to men to have affairs and most of the time women are clueless and taken by surprise like i was contributing 50% for finances and household what else he needed? Maybe ability to listen? not to be judgmental? be kinder to people. You reap what you saw. If you keep personally attacking people, dont expect receive flowers back

You have revealed yours starting from your first message. And yes faith is the only thing which is left to you, would it be enough it is another question

Exactly and I kept asking her to stop attacking me. She didnt listen. Now she is unhappy that I attack her back.

Are you God to judge me? Your arrogance knows no limits.

i am not limiting. I look at all men with similar education levels and many professional jobs. Just getting most likes from those likes presumable because of location. I appreciate that this thread has been quite long but I expained it several times