WWYD? BF moving didn’t tell me

[ShockedAF]

Been with bf 3y.
We live next door. We see each other most days and have done for the last 2y.

Recently he’s been on tidy spree, saying he wants to declutter his life. I was over there last night seemed normal.

Today a For Sale sign has gone up. He’s at work. Photographs already online at the Estate Agent.

He’s texting as normal. I feel sick and shaky. I’ve gone ice cold.

He’s decluttering me out of his life isn’t he?

My plan is to just block him and never speak to him again. WWYD?

Weird thread from the start

99% of women would ask their boyfriend wtf is going on not type on mumsnet WWYD

well it would be confront the fukker of course not hide away
now he’s told you he’s in financial trouble but doesn’t have to sell the house mmm thats either he sells or not mmmmn which is it?

so the ball is in your court and your dumping him I take it after your long chat last night.

I think you need therapy so sort out why you’re a push over. That isn’t normal behaviour after 3 years in a relationship to hide and want to block him right away. He also needs therapy to find out why he can’t be open in a relationship too and lives on secrets and lies.

Your not married you dont live together your not partners just boyfriend and girlfriend.
Its up to him what he dose.

Said with a huge lack of empathy.
Poor OP is really distraught here and you're kicking her.
Have a word with yourself.

This happened to me with an ex. He decided that he couldn’t afford the rent anymore and was going to move in with me instead, after a few months. Safe to say he very quickly became an ex and he ended up back at his parents 🤣

He sounds like a spineless shit op, sending hugs x

I didnt read the whole thread cba.
Words to myself to just say what i think and not sugar coat it.

What a weird thread. Is communication dead these days?
I'm old enough to remember that to dump someone you told them in person or maybe over the phone, none of this ghosting, blocking or putting your house up for sale 😂
People seem to have very odd, uncommunicative relationships.

He may not have expected the for sale sign to be put up. Some people specify to not have them but then the agent ignores that request and puts one up anyway.

This 💯

“fuck off and keep on fucking off” is golden - I will be using this.

Well done OP, better off without him! Hope you can get a lovely holiday soon.

Totally agree

What makes you think 99% of women would ask their BF what's going on?

@ShockedAF “He didn’t apologise. He tried more gaslighting saying I would have ‘gone mad’ no matter how he told me”

Versus you finding a sign on his lawn that will make you “less mad”? What age is this dude? 16?

I bet his financial problems are worse than he has told you, and that he plans to put stuff in storage and move in with you - temporarily of course until he buys a new place..................

Wow he sounds awful OP - so sorry this is happening. I was wondering whether he actually confirmed on the phone he was breaking up with you? Obviously you know exactly what you’re doing as a result of this, but wondered whether he said he was leaving the house and you? Or is he expecting you to want to carry on the relationship?

Well that's utterly charming.

Thank you.

No - I wouldn't want to look at his horrible, lying face either, phone is much easier.

No he seemed to think it changed nothing with us and it wouldn’t stop us seeing each other if he moves. I just ignored that because nothing would have made me move away from him. He’s chosen to sell as it makes an investment cheaper for him but he didn’t need to sell - that’s if I’ve got the truth - probably not.

Mostly he was just absorbed with himself and what a hard time he’s had this year and is still having. To be fair he has had some really horrible things going on.

But I said ‘You have to stop blaming all these other things now. This is your behaviour and your choices. Which is fine, but behaving like this has had consequences on me’. He went quiet and then tried a little joke.

I’ll really miss his company but I think I’d be an absolute mug to carry on seeing him now.

Indeed you would be a mug to keep seeing him. For him not to discuss his plans with you in advance and making up nonsense about decluttering.

It's over. And because he's just too odd to be bothered with.

Ignoring and blocking him is making his life easy isn’t it? He just carries on with his moving preparations and doesn’t have you to deal with. Also I think blocking is childish. I would knock on his door and say, “I see you’re moving so bye and have a nice life”. It’s hurtful for you but at least you can have the last word. I wouldn’t let him say anything either, just walk off or the gaslighting will start.

This sounds truly awful and I think you are handling it quite well. I think you went cold because of the shock, you shut down.

Do you think he views your relationship as a FWB and therefore he doesn't need to consider your feelings on what he chooses to do, whereas you view your relationship as solid and long term where you think of each other?

If he’s having financial problems and wants/needs to sell his house thats his decision OP, his circus, his monkeys, I’m not understanding the outrage about a difficult financial situation he got himself into, I do understand your anger regarding him not telling you but it sounds like you would have been quite angry had he told you. Looks like this dude plans to continue seeing you just wants to downsize to some place in the same area? I’m not sure who is acting stranger you or him.

I would be torn between demanding to know abd completely ignoring the elephant in the room.

I’m afraid I think you’d be a mug to carry on seeing him too. It’s not just the shock of seeing the For Sale sign, though that was so dreadful and totally thoughtless of him, but the fact that he hasn’t bothered - or hasn’t wanted - to involve or consult or even tell you about something so major to the lives of both of you. You would never be able to fully trust him again. At least, I wouldn't.