MIL changed inheritance

[deargodno]

FIL sadly passed away a few years ago from a terminal illness and had arranged will, inheritance etc with MIL before he did - they agreed on everything together as to what the kids would inherit after she died, as everything of his went to her.

The 5 adult kids were set to have everything split equally between them in this arrangement. 2 children were biologically his, 3 were not but he raised them and wanted everything split equally.

Last year MIL fell out with one of the kids and quietly had everything changed. Now the majority goes to the 2 kids she likes the most, 2 in the middle get less, and the one she fell out with gets a lot less.

My OH is now one of the middle tier inheriters. We assumed everyone else knew about the situation but we recently found out that she's not told the other middle inheriter that she's changed the will, nor the one at the bottom. We think this is because she knows they're likely to be upset about it - she has an established history of favouring certain kids over others just generally, and it does upset my OH because he knows as a kid he was left out of things and never given as much time or attention.

We are not super close to the others - would you tell them or not? We don't care about the money because we have a good income, but the other middle/bottom don't and also have kids to think about and plan for. (The 2 top inheriters are already in the strongest financial position in their day to day lives).

We have encouraged her to tell them multiple times but she's had a year to tell them and not done it, and is evasive when it's brought up.

But then again maybe next year she'll fall out with someone else and change it all again?

I guess my question is, if you were one of the kids where your inheritance had been changed unfavourably, would you have wanted/expected someone else to tell you about it if they knew you didn't know?

This is predominantly a British site and I assume that the will is under English and Welsh law. The will cannot be contested here because it is uneven between children.

Sorry you have taken it this way. I only feel sadness. Its just further depressing when your nok die and they don't express wishes as talking about death is taboo.

My mum wasn't at all religious but we did her a religious service because she never wanted to talk about death. Never wanted to talk about poa until in hindsight, too late because she died before it went through.

I see my mil doing the same thing to dh but ultimately that's never going to be my problem.

I think the Englist attitude to death is unhealthy, but it doesn't make me angry, just sad. I think I could have prevented my mums death I'd I had poa but I didn't and although that added to the pain at the time, it's done. She had a horrible end and I have to respect that was her ill informed choice I had no power to prevent.

Not what I would choose for myself. I see dhs parents I their 70s being cagey, no idea if they have poa for each other etc. I can see a either
A) dh dealing what I had to deal with
B) being able to do nothing know nothing and any care being choose by the state

I just don't think it's ideal really.

if I knew a potential inheritance was actually going to cost me money more than I was inheriting then I would be taking action now to limit that liability. Can the commercial properties be sold or repairs carried out before so you don’t end up paying for an inheritance that isn’t even yours. Has anyone got power of attorney as sounds like she might need help

Some people just shouldn't have been mums x