Yes, can't ignore the big stuff! But sometimes when I think about what could be the 'big stuff', I feel like I'm overthinking it and overcomplicating it. Neither of us have kids or a complicated ex or assets situation, so I genuinely might be making a bigger deal out of little lifestyle things.
It's normal to have scars and as a result worry a bit once you start getting seriously into someone, right? Especially with kids involved. Guess there's just a fine line between staying grounded and relationship anxiety - sounds like very much the former and all positive for you though! Are you usually a slow mover when developing a connection?
My last serious ex was emotionally very complicated (the type that pulls away and goes to his man cave when he is worried, instead of being able to share it) and I probably have some scars from that/ look out for similar behaviours.
Mr WorkCrush is very different. He opens up without me even asking. He seems... uncomplicated in the best way.
It's a strange month for us. We are both pushed to the limit at work and unable to message/meet til the evening. Every day when he gets out, he immediately messages 'can I see you?'
And we meet but because we're so worn out and on the edge, we probably spend the first 15 mins just unloading on each other before we relax a bit and actually enjoy it. It's an odd situation to be in so early on, although I suppose it's not bad for building emotional closeness and psychological safety.
Having said that, I don't want to overburden him and actually still keep it fun and relaxing between us. So I'm feeling pretty horrific this morning and would love to see him, but just feel like we aren't 'that far along' yet. I know I can be a bit much when I'm like I am today, just feels weird having to think 'if I do this, the other person might not receive it well'. Whereas 1-2 years into a relationship it's obviously very different.
The point I'm making is that while this early stage is so exciting and happy, there's also times where you need to hold off doing what you feel like doing as it might be 'too much, too soon'. Also you're constantly finding out new things about the other person that can make you readjust. Weirdly, the more we get to know one another, the more we realise we are quite alike - both having thought we're a bit unconventional and would find it hard to find someone aligned with our life choices.
Anyway, I'm just leaning into the happy and secure feelings and have decided to 'just enjoy the ride and don't put pressure on it as there's actually nothing to lose'. But I can feel myself craving his company, and I'm usually quite independent, so I'm certainly falling and it scares me a bit.