Just realised this about DH. is this normal?

[Cactustoy]

I've always looked very young for my age but as I'm approaching 50 I can see it's starting to catch up with me!

I'm 7 years younger than my DH.
I've noticed that he criticises women on the TV (never men) about their looks, weight etc..
Just last night ' who's that chunky old thing'
This morning ' God she's looking old' - said about suzanna reid, who BTW looks fantastic!

He's not someone who thinks before he speaks but I've realised lately that it's made me more aware and scared of the aging process. I'm even considering botox!
I put a new top on the other day and he said something like ' that's nice, it makes you look younger'.
Am I being too sensitive? Do other DHs do this? Do they just think it and not say it?

He is a revolting old misogynist who needs to take a long look in a mirror. Vile.

I’d leave. I bet there’s a lot more to this.

He sounds like a wanker and if he got the opportunity he would trade you in for a younger model. If my partner made a comment like that I would be reeling off every minor flaw he has and to be honest I’d probably leave him if it continued because that’s a vile thing to thing but an even worse thing to say. We all have the odd mean thought about someone’s appearance, but those things are inside thoughts.

Ditch the bloke, and don't inject crap into your face for his sake (or at all).

It seems you've just accepted that living with a nasty man just is life.

Why not start widening your circle? - hobbies, friends.

And then hopefully will come the confidence to realise that life without him will be more pleasurable than life with him.

Your comment that it's just one problem among many doesn't suprise me at all, someone who is judgemental, shallow and misogynistic and happy to undermine the confidence of his partner is going to be widely problematic to be in a relationship with in many ways.

Never mind what he finds attractive, is he attractive to you as a person? Is he someone you want to remain in a relationship with? I certainly would not.

He sounds awful. From my own circle of friends and colleagues, the women have aged much better than the men!! Mostly because the women spend more time/thought on personal care and maintenance.

Thinking of it now, there are lots of pot bellies and receding hairlines on the men only. I’d never say anything about it though.

Sounds like your OH is massively insecure about himself!! Moron.

True I guess amongst that demographic. I don’t watch love island but I’m sure you’re right. And I do feel concerned about my nephews and nieces being exposed to all this.

I live in hope and do my best to call it out whenever I come across it personally (too often).

He's probably diverting from his own insecurity about him aging, and being a smoker, he won't be looking good by his age. Sounds like he's lucky to have you, probably knows this and is attempting to make you feel as insecure as he is in the hope that it makes you less likely to dump him.
I hope he just vapes these days as the smell of stale smoke is grim for a non-smoker, so I can't think how that would of initially attracted you.
You could do a direct question, something like " are you worried I might dump you as you get older as I won't, but if you are thinking you might dump me, I suggest you take a look in the mirror first". That should shut him up.
It's being magnanimous to say that the tena advert respons could be a general aversion he has to being reminded of the effects of aging, in which case, he should maybe respond the same to viagra adds or anything prostate, cancer or heart related. Would he respond the same to stroke adverts ( they come on occasionally)? He's actually got a higher chance of needing that advice given his lifestyle.
Deep down I'd say he's struggling with facing that at his age he could be living on borrowed time being a smoker. He's getting faced with his own mortality.

This bloke can't be bothered to look after himself to do anything to improve his own health instead he undermines his wife's self-confidence so that he can superior to her.
I think you need to start pushing back OP😈

I agree with you. Except that I think it's unfair to comment on men's receding hair lines, there's nothing they can do about that and I do feel for men that they have to cope with losing their hair and being ribbed about it.

it is entirely fair to say "well, Frank, your balding head and paunch aren't doing you any favours" when they have been spouting shit about what women look like.

Just to say it out of the blue when he doesn't do that? would be unreasonable.

I don't disagree. However, I think your retort contains more words than he is worth.
I would stick to 'shut it fatty' 😁

Just turn the tables and start making disparaging remarks. If he can do it, so can you.

A few "Crikey, that Tom Cruise is starting to look his age, isn't he?" or "You look a bit like that chap in the funeral plan advert" type of comments wouldn't go amiss.

My dh used to do this all the time, I brought it up with him and he doesn't do it anymore. Granted he never says anything negative about me, always compliments me, although I know I look as rough as a badgers arse most of the time.

And the perfect username! Excellent!

Your husband sounds like a first class wanker.

No it's not normal. He's a prick.

I would start subtlety criticising him if I were you he sounds like a real peach wonder what underlying resentments are really going on here

I’d make some comments about men you see on TV and how they are aging… see how he responds. I have a feeling he will quieten down!

My DP does the same - can't keep his trap shut. Opinions on ever woman's looks, especially newsreaders first thing in the morning.
He used to think he looked like Hugh Jackman.😂

Unless the botox is for him to stop him opening and closing his big gob, don't bother, I bet you look fine.

Got yourself a bit of a sexist shallow wanker, there unfortunately. I would be throwing in a few comments:

“ Have you looked in a mirror lately?”
”You’re no oil painting, either.”
”Whoa, steady on there, David Gandy”
”Smoking speeds up the aging process, you know”
….etc.

Don’t put poison into your face, kick the ‘poison’ out the front door?

Hilarious 🤣 and soo true !

We are the opposite in our household, I took him to my hairdresser the other week and literally asked them if he was salvagable. Mostly because he was bringing our average up by 5 years when strangers guessed our age 😂

I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting your partner to make an effort. I'd want someone to be honest and tell me when I'm letting things slide before they slide too far.