Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Stay at home mum of 1 child? Frowned upon?

487 replies

Spudulanky · 11/09/2024 09:15

Why do other people/mums care?!

The child is school age.. its gossiped about.. but why??

honestly why???

OP posts:
MorvernBlack · 13/09/2024 20:13

vickylou78 · 13/09/2024 09:25

But the ops child is at school she isn't looking after the children during the day. She just doesn't work

I'm not sure what the relevance is to your reply? I didn't mention anything about children being at school or not.

SouthLondonMum22 · 13/09/2024 20:48

YOYOK · 13/09/2024 18:10

Let’s assume the child is awake from 7 am and SAHP drop them at 9 am (2 hours), collect at 3 (don’t count those hours they’re at school) and they go to bed at 7 pm. That’s 6 hours a day the child is awake and active and needs care. You can see why it’s hard to juggle it all!!

Which can be very similar for someone who works too depending on their work hours.

spaceshooter · 13/09/2024 21:14

How do you know they are gossiping about you?

Viviennemary · 13/09/2024 21:54

Nocheezesforusmeeses · 11/09/2024 13:24

How much time does being so sneery take out of your day?

As much time as being smug I suppose.

YOYOK · 13/09/2024 22:49

SouthLondonMum22 · 13/09/2024 20:48

Which can be very similar for someone who works too depending on their work hours.

Yes, of course. You could work part time (both parents) and make it work. The sticking point is the long school holidays though. It isn’t easy!

vickylou78 · 14/09/2024 07:38

MorvernBlack · 13/09/2024 20:13

I'm not sure what the relevance is to your reply? I didn't mention anything about children being at school or not.

You said you worried your DD wouldn't be able to stay home with her babies. This is different to the op who's children are school age and out at school during the day.

acontinuouscharity · 14/09/2024 11:17

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Tryonemoretime · 14/09/2024 11:45

Threesmycrowd · 11/09/2024 09:59

To be honest i wouldn't have thought twice about it if i met you in person but since you've brought it up here you have piqued my curiosity! And I wonder if curiosity is part of the reason for the gossip - if you only have one child and they're at school all day, what do you do with your time? It sounds lonely and boring to me. Maybe if people knew you were a SAHM and a passionate daily breadmaker/needlework artist/literacy volunteer they would have less to say and more to relate to (in principle at least)!

I was a SAH mum because my husband worked extremely long hours (out of choice) and we both wanted me to be a constant in our children's lives. I'm not judging anyone else, but this division of labour worked for us. I was never bored. I met up with friends, joined various groups and was actively involved with our church. We had quite a big age gap between baby 2 and 3 so was also involved with different things related to their age groups. I was extremely privileged to be able to do this and my husband was privileged to come home after a long day's work to an ordered household. All our food was home cooked and 2 out of 3 children were happily reading by age 3 in a programme I devised for them. The 2nd child wanted to do early ballet and gym instead. I didn'tforceany of them to do things they didn't want.. I did go back to teaching for a short time when number 3 was at top end primary but then decided to tutor instead. Now retired.

MissTrip82 · 14/09/2024 12:08

We have an ordered household and high-achieving children.

We both work full-time.

We have meaningful work that is vital to the community. We worked long and hard for the academic success and career progression we have enjoyed as senior doctors. We both share our responsibilities as parents, including our responsibility to provide financially for our children. We both value being able to work to support ourselves and our beautiful family.

I suppose we all take different paths in life.

I don’t imagine anyone is jealous of me; I find it incredible that anyone thinks I might be jealous of them.

Wetherspoons · 14/09/2024 14:53

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

You're a CF with the spam 🖕

BunsHun · 23/09/2024 17:31

Nothing like a mean spirited woman being anti-male even though his was one of the only kind and sane comments. What exactly was the issue with his point? Women do need to lift each other up and it's a shame that we shit on someone just for pointing it out. At least men know how to interact with each other without there being a passive aggressive competition. It's 'women' like you that make other normal women not want to make friends with you!

SilverQuill · 16/12/2024 12:12

So much petty bullshit on here...the school playground mentality never really goes, does it ladies?

New posts on this thread. Refresh page