Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Does your partner mind you going out?

178 replies

Emeraldiisland · 30/08/2024 01:37

I very rarely go out on my own. This will be the first time since having DS. I have been invited to an ex colleague's birthday party on Saturday.
I checked DH was free to look after DS and everything was good. Except since then he's made a few comments about me going out. I even caught him moaning to his mum yesterday.
He doesn't go out loads either but has been out more than me since having DS and I never complain about it.
I asked him if it was because he sees it as his money as I'm currently carer to DS so not bringing in any money but he denied that. However he's still making me feel like I shouldn't go out and keeps asking what time I'll be home at and telling me not to drink too much and checking exactly who's going, all things that I never say to him.
Part of me is tempted to cancel Saturday but I know I'll regret it if I do. I just need to find a way to get DH to stop nagging me. Does your partner /husband make you feel guilty if you want to go out? If so how do you deal with it?

OP posts:
Daleksatemyshed · 02/09/2024 18:38

Sorry Op but you're posts are making this sound worse and worse- you went out once after two years and he begrudged you that. Going out again in two months time is not making a habit of it.

Starlight1979 · 04/09/2024 09:07

Emeraldiisland · 02/09/2024 07:17

I honestly don't think he's cheated on me because he's been disgusted by his friend who did this a lot (not friends any longer). So I don't think it's that.
He tells me I'm the best that ever happened to him and generally he really affectionate but when I upset him he's like a different person (with me., he's always good with the kids).
Things are still not back to normal but I showed him photos from Saturday that my friends had taken and I think he believes me now.
I haven't told him they invited me out for Halloween drinks though. I'm not sure I'll go to that though, I don't want to get in to the habit of going out loads.

Oh my god I cannot believe that people live like this and think it's ok.

I showed him photos from Saturday that my friends had taken and I think he believes me now.

Believes what exactly?!?!?! That you didn't cheat on him?!

That is so strange. What did the photos "prove" @Emeraldiisland ???

I haven't told him they invited me out for Halloween drinks though. I'm not sure I'll go to that though, I don't want to get in to the habit of going out loads.

It's twice. In two years. I went out twice last week and DP didn't even bat an eyelid.

OP, he is making you feel bad about going out so that you don't do it again. Or at least, you don't want to. Because it isn't worth the upset and arguments.

You know that's not normal don't you?

Nanny0gg · 04/09/2024 15:49

Emeraldiisland · 02/09/2024 08:12

I never said I didn't trust him. Posters were asking me if it was possible he was cheating so I was just explaining it's highly unlikely..
Saturday night was my first night out in over two years so to go from that to twice in a couple of months is unreasonable.

No it's not!

The sooner he gets used to it the better!

New posts on this thread. Refresh page