DP unreasonable late nights

[Somethingwaswrong]

Hi I am in the process of moving house and me and DP are staying with my mum for 6 weeks while we exchange on the new house. Not ideal as my DP is not the easiest to live with and likes his own space, as does my mum so I feel stuck in the middle. Anyway. My partner usually stays up til 2/3am playing video games and would usually do this in his home office but is continuing to do this while we share a room at my mum's. So I have to sleep from around 11-2am with an eye mask on and hope he doesn't wake me. The noise of the laptop alone is waking me up let alone him walking around making a snack, going to bathroom etc. I have asked him to come to bed earlier as it feels really unfair but he said he can't sleep and he is being as quiet as he can. I'm fed up being woken up every night but not sure what the solution is?

Where has the OP said this?

The thread was posted 24h ago and they are at her mum’s for six weeks. So it’s unlikely exchange on the new place is happening tomorrow, say.

Her whole future plans are changing - she doesn’t have to do it in less than a day to appease a MN sense of drama.

The first post was bad enough!

Then it just gets worse

And worse

And worse.

More flags than a golf course!

Do not get pregnant

Do not get pregnant

Do not get pregnant

My eyes have been well and truly opened so have a lot to figure out

The fact he is being rude to your mum should be enough. He is staying in her home and can't even be civil because he resents staying there? What sort of childish logic is that? Frankly, he is an arsehole and you need to get rid. Your mum and sister will be over the moon, trust me.

Put yourself first and make your mother's life easier at the same time. Good luck.

Just make sure you do so before you exchange contracts. Much easier & cheaper to pull out now than in 6 months time when you've moved in & the property is in joint names.

Just count up the cost of Stamp Duty, EA & solicitors fees when you sell and worse of all, if he drags his feet, all the mortgage payments you'll have to pay because I bet he wont pay his share if you split.

Plus, I bet the reason his own mother doesn't want him back is less to do with her being a clean freak and more that she knows he's an arsehole too.

Yes we have a few weeks until anything is getting signed so I'm thinking to have this discussion at the weekend when he has time to move somewhere as he also works from home so don't feel I can just throw him out midweek with no notice.

You can. But you can also choose to end things in a way that preserves your sense of fairness and the proper way to behave. However, and it's a big one, he has been eating away at your boundaries for a long time so don't let him wheedle more out of you. Please.

I'm afraid you'll lose your mojo and give him yet another chance.

I can guarantee being sleep deprived every night is enough motivation to tell him to get lost, as it begins again tonight!

If he plays that poor me where will I work card, you say somewhere you’re not being a jerk to your partner, taking all the good space without a second thought, and being an asshole to the kind woman who offered you to live there. You’ll work it out.

He can spend some of his inheritance on an Airbnb!

If only he had this much consideration for you and your sleep op, or for your mum. Honestly tell him to leave tomorrow, he won't be homeless will he, he has family that he is very close to.

this too. He's not exactly penniless is he. he can get a hotel worst case scenario.

Blokes with jobs and savings aren't going to live on the street. He'll be fine. But with just 2 women in the house, do you feel safe to have this conversation? Do you need to speak with your mum first to come up with a strategy? Do you have backup if needed?

Good luck op . He may offer to change but remember he's only doing it because you are ending it. Not because you asked him to, not because it's the right thing to do. One thing I have learnt in my fifty years on this planet is people only change for themselves not for others.

Genuinely. It also sounds like he will be much happier living his own way without having to consider actual feelings of actual other people as well.

Good luck OP, let us know how it goes!

Christ! Do not buy a house together and get him out of your mother's property pronto.

You will deeply regret being financially entangled, deeply.

His beyond selfish behaviour booms immaturity and a signal you should run for the hills. You'll have a life of misery with this one.

Spit on, @Cm19841

Let him go back to his mum's!

works from home, well right now he is working from your mother's home ! and he can do that just as easily as from his mother's home / a hotel / an airb&b or a short term rental...

If OP wants to wait until the weekend, she can. It’s a massive change in her life plans, it’s ok to take a moment

Good luck OP and I sincerely hope that in the interim you've nicked the router cable at bed time.

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