Crush on a married man

[Quynhoi09]

I haven't started it! So don't judge me, I didnt even know he was married when I started to crush on him.

So he is a driver and I work in an office and we meet sometimes 4 times a day to every 2 dáy, depending on his workload.

It all started with his strong eye contact. We keep going like this for 4 months already. He is 10 years older than me, green eyes and so confident but mysterious and playful.

It all started when I caught him staring at me and holding my gaze. I mean, he rarely looks away first even now.

He is also clumsy and nervous around me and we often talk and joke and smile when we meet and we like to spend time alone together just talking and staring deep into each other's eyes and the attraction is so obvious that 2 of his other colleagues that also work as drivers started teasing us when they saw us, on different days.

He stare at me when other men come to talk to me as well.

The thing is I asked him out once over text and he said he doesnt have time because he has a family and told me to find someone else.

I did agree and took it as a sign to finally move on. But it didnt end here like I thought. When we meet 3 days later I tried to ingore him but as soon as he meet me he said "Im not upset. Just dont send me texts like that anymore coz if my wife sees she will leave me" and that was it all.

And after a few days I comepletly ignored him, not even look at him, he started lingering around me, like he doesnt wanna go and then he tried to approach me to make jokes or greet me first. Sometimes he also calls me to help him with work related things.

And when he saw me staring at him again he held my gaze for a few seconds, it made me melt. And we keep making eye contact again now , especially before he leaves he will stare at me until he pass me from his car everytime.

He followed my tiktok and sent me a greeting as well when I followed him back.

Sometimes I have to even call him for work related stuff in the evening and he'd tell me that he got home and he'll take my call, why isn't he scared of his wife at home lol.

And why he does all these things if he claims to love his wife so much?

Did you ever had a situation like this? How did it end?

mysterious and playful ... finger down throat!! Enter Mills and Boon.
He sounds utterly creepy. He's just messing with you. Rise above it.

You sure it's just the block they've been round a few times!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣.

Op stop reading into things he's clearly tried to make it clear he's married and let you down gently in hoped you'd jog on. But sounds like he has to still communicate with you at work for work reasons so doesn't want to be really awkward around you!

He's a driver and he's married. Being a driver means he is travelling around, so isn't that wonderful that he has a wife at home but gets to play around with his oh-so meaningful smouldering looks while he's away. Yawn!!!

Maybe spend some time thinking about why you’re into someone unavailable.
is this a safer option?
Learn your attachment style and work with what you find.
leave him alone, it’s only going to end in heartbreak and upset.

I get adverts for this reading app, it claims to be all about "romance and fanfiction". The sample they show you to read is always from the genre that I call "werewolf porn". It reads a lot like the OP 😂

When does school start again?

This is a joke right?

Stop being trashy and grow up

Are you very young @Quynhoi09 ?

Have you read this in the latest novel you're reading?

#ThisDidntHappen

This is 100% a troll. Fuck off loser "lol 🤣"

Sorry op but if this is real then it's pretty clear all these married blokes are chatting you up because they can see you lap it up and they think they might get an easy lay. It's nothing to do with how attractive or nice you are.

He likes the attention but it will never go further, he's made that clear.
You can either continue in the same way with the knowledge that this is all it will ever be. Or you can stop responding to him and let it peter out.
Either way there's no point in hoping it will go further.

OP, your writing style is quite odd. Do you read a lot of cheap romantic fiction? Tbh, you sound very, very immature and slightly off kilter. Your fantasy is all in your head. Sorry to be harsh, but if this guy and other drivers are hugging and giving you attention, it's probably because they see a vulnerable, lonely youngster, not realising they are dealing with an unhinged bunny boiler. Go play with people your own age or start another hobby.

For people like you, all I can hope for is karma will bite you one day.

Have some respect for yourself and his wife.

Married men for me are absolutely no go
(married myself, so...) and slightly off-putting.

Behave your self. He’s flirty and it’s banter and you are taking it too far.

Let’s hope that when you’re married your husband doesn’t have a colleague 10 years younger than you trying to shag him. That would be awful wouldn’t it.

You sound very young and immature, I wonder if you're just very inexperienced with men and relationships in general. You may be reading too much into this man's actions and body language. Maybe you lack confidence in yourself, and are seizing every little gesture and nuance as a sign that you are a femme fatale?. Give yourself time to learn about men, do not indulge in pointless flirting with married men, as others have said you will get a bad reputation. This man has made it clear to you that he is not available. There will be plenty of single men who have good intentions towards you, wouldn't that be a better prospect? .

^ this.

You need to stop indulging your own fantasies, it isn't good for the workplace. It all sounds like a power play on both sides for different, insecure reasons!

Wow
Get some morals
Stop breaking a marriage
But do you have any standards even
You have been a child and you have seen your own parent
Imagine another girl texting your dad whilst he is with your mum and your mum ends up being a single mum and having to raise you child alone and you having no dad really in your daily life.
So because of strong eye contact you are happy to destroy a mother's life and a daughter's life and who knows how many children he has. And ruin his life.
stop being a selfish homewrecker and go find someone single.
Its probs a nice ego boost each day for you knowing he is checking you out and you can tease as you please. You probs feel over the moon .

Seriously I'm really proud of the driver. Disgusted at you. Seriously. Imagine ruining a three year old girls life by trying to get with her dad.

Grow up.

Get your ego boost from somewhere else.

And why he does all these things if he claims to love his wife so much?

Because he can and has found a woman stupid enough to play along.

I say stupid because you will get nothing but heartbreak from playing along and strongly urge you to cut it out right now, for your own sake.

Find something better for you to think about. Good luck.

Hopefully when you are older and married with children you will have a husband who gets his thrills from sleeping with lots of younger women ( who he doesn’t actually give a shit about) . Karma.
It’s easy to attract men when you are young, available and have low self esteem. It’s very sad that you would care about an ego boost more than your self respect. Because these guys are only after sex and they don’t really care where they get it from .

Because I am assuming you do all the eye flirting and are very flirty with body language.
Here's a thought and this always works
Ask how is wife and kids are and ask what his children are called. Keep your conversations about his family.
When you are holding eye contact and flirting and probs dressing to impress with the extra glass and pointing as walking past and all smiley when he flirts then that's why

I'm clumsy, anxious, make strong eye contact (due to my invisible disability) I am also very friendly, smiley, affectionate, jokey etc... with everyone I'm friendly/close to as thats my personality.

It in no way means I fancy them or want to leave my DH.

You have read far too much into someone just being friendly, you are still convinced after straight up being told by him to stop because you are crossing lines. If you where a man this would give Incel vibes.