Stingy restaurant behaviour has given me the ick

[HazelSchmazel]

This afternoon, I went on a second date with a guy I met on Tinder. Wasn't too sure after the first date, but I thought I'd give him the benefit of the doubt.

We had a nice meal and the bill was in the region of £50. When it was time to pay, I placed £30 (cash) in the middle of the table on the basis of £25 for my share and a £5 tip (our shares of food and drink were pretty much 50/50). He then proffered my £30 to the waiter, together with his credit card and said 'put £20 on my card'. So the poor waiting staff get no tip and my £5 effectively goes into his pocket!!! Uuuurgh - instant ick!

I should have said something, but I just wanted to get the fuck away from the knuckle dragger asap! Plus I was temporarily deaf from the thunderclap of my fanny slamming shut.

Now snuggled up with my cat, a bar of chocolate and am planning a Netflix binge, together with a future life of celibacy. Bliss!

Anyone else with a story of financially induced ick?

oh come on 🤣

You don't owe him anything Op but maybe it would be a kindness to educate him rather than ghost him. Point out eating the same meal means the same price- so you don't pay £30 and he pays £20. Then ghost him

Nonsense, tipping is generally a given even in the UK, and even more generally is considered good etiquette. His share should have included enough to cover a tip.

Some people are just tight and it's really unattractive.

Did you tell him that a) he owes £5 for the rest of his meal and b) he owes £5 for a tip?

He didn't.

His half was £25

Lol

No it isn’t- I eat out with loads of different people in different places and very very few tip, it’s more usual not to tip. Add to which hardly anyone carries cash anymore.

A lot of people are earning the same as waiting staff and not being tipped, so they don’t feel the need to tip- it’s odd to tip someone who is making the same as you is the thinking.

Yeah urghhh… BUT my mind goes totally blank in these situations esp early days dating. I’ve nearly left without paying at all and have def not left a tip (on top of service) through general distraction/anxiety… could it have been that?

People who can afford their weekly shop but never put something in for the foodbank, give me the ick. Or when you do, they comment something negative about benefit scroungers or spending on booze instead of feeding kids.

Tbh I would be turned off by the 50 50, going dutch, that's what I would expect from a friend, not someone I was trying to impress in a romantic way during early dating. I'm old fashioned though but if a guy suggested , shall we split this , that would be a turn off.

Same 😂

Well that's a stretch!

He should have paid his full share of £25.

Ok he doesn't have to tip, but he's not entitled to take £5 off the OP and only pay £20.

And it's extremely presumptuous to think there might be another occasion when only on a second date.

And now we know why he's single.

Tell him you’re still deaf from your thunderclap!!

He didn't split. He paid less. I wish you would have told him, OP.

Really?! I’d feel terrible letting someone else pay unless I knew I would def be returning the favour on a follow up date. I always split. Or take turns once into things a bit deeper

How would it be 'out of fairness' to let the other person pay more? You make it sound like you'd be doing them a favour?!

Haha, poor you 😅

Never understood tipping in restaurants

I don't tip the cashier when I go shopping

I wouldn't go on a 3rd date OP, but I think ghosting him is a shitty thing to do.

Where’s chivalry gone?? I have an 18 year old son, he honestly for 80% dates he takes his girlfriend on.

He was awful for not paying his full share and pocketing £5 off of you but you can’t assume someone is going to be adding a tip to the bill, it’s not necessary and a lot of people don’t do it.
When putting the money down I would have said this is my share plus £5 for the tip.

Do you think this guy sounds like the type to donate to a food bank?